Matt Damon is pregnant

March 10th, 2008 // 53 Comments

Matt Damon is pregnant again! Whether his wife Luciana Barroso or Sarah Silverman is the father is up for debate. People reports:

The current PEOPLE Sexiest Man Alive, 37, and his wife, 32, stepped out Sunday night at the Empire Film Awards in London – with Luciana glowing (and sporting a baby bump).

While some might worry that the pregnancy will impact Matt Damon’s announcement he’ll do a fourth Jason Bourne movie, I have some exclusive news*. It turns out our boy Matt is working a De Niro. The fourth film is entitled The Bourne Reproduction. Breast milk meets danger August 2009.

*Pulled directly from my ass.

Photo: Getty Images
superficial

  1. jimmy

    first

  2. Thia

    i’m f***ing matt damon!

  3. Dave

    first

  4. Ted Mosby

    She’s fu*king Matt Damon

  5. I’m f***ing Ben Affleck.

    I really don’t find Matt Damon sexy.
    Has he always had a fivehead?

  6. D. Richards (Hungry.)

    Nope: Wrong again.

    Matt’s wife suffers from horrid indigestion. The ‘bump’ is the result of months worth of feces, trapped inside of her large intestine — growing.

  7. Jennifer2

    Yes she is pregnant. I’ve seen about many sites such as (BillionaireCupid.co m) about this and I’m just wondering, is anyone else tired of hearing about her? I know I am! She’s just a person, like you and me, so what. She got pregnant. Millions of people get pregnant a year. No offense, but who cares? I really don’t like Jamie Spears so hearing all these questions about her is getting annoying.

  8. leelee

    lol at number 6

    who would wanna fuck her or him i mean ewww

  9. cutell

    cute couple. BTW, She wrote blog on a celeb dating site recently named “Searching Millionaire dot com”. It attacted many fans. Is she feeling lonely?

  10. Chauncey Gardner

    That’s Matt Damon’s wife? She’s not very attractive, is she?

  11. Auntie Kryst

    Wow, Jennifer2 way to step up your spamming copy. Completely wrong celebrity, but good snark. Tell your overlord that I approve, and you should get a second bowl of rice today.

  12. Anexio

    Wow, his wife is really atractive in a just crossed the border in a sort of way.

  13. fergernauster

    She is pregnant and they are both average looking.

    I am craving a POGO!

  14. There’s a “born” identity joke in here somewhere…

  15. I always thought Matt had a vagina..

  16. will

    LOL@11

    Kill yourselves, spammers. No one gives a fuck about your stupid ass sites.

  17. HILL

    he has to, Jimbo, because I KNOW sara silverman has a penis

  18. killer

    Matt has a huge forehead.

  19. Lisa

    If you want to know more about them,you can come to “S e e k i n g R i c h .c o m “.And you can find rich,handsome boufriend or cute girlfriend here.Of course,it is true.

  20. Lisa, you’re right! I think that’s where Star found her 19 year old line cook that lives with his mom. Of course it it true..

  21. oh please

    how is it the sexiest man alive is seen out in public with a wetback in a second hand 80′s prom dress?

  22. Lisa, what’s a boufriend?
    Sounds voluminous.

    18: Fivehead.

  23. Dear Mr. D. Richards

    I would imagine the same sort of bowel obstruction you describe occurs with you only involving congealed semen? No offense at all intended just curious.

  24. I see he abides by the old adage and song lyric “if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, choose an ugly woman to be your wife…”

  25. sweet mamma

    i wish i was fucking matt damon ……….

  26. sweet mamma

    i wish i was fucking matt damon ……….

  27. @25 & 26, Why, do you have a penis like Sara SIlverman??

  28. Jennifer Hammond

    God, his wife is ugly. She looks just like every other mexitrash tramp thats here in this country illegally. He couldnt breed with someone more attractive than that thing?

  29. AC

    Damn you guys are brutal. Maybe she’s got a great personality. And she’s not Mexican, she’s Argentine.

  30. carx

    matt damon is married?

  31. D. Richards (Mr.)

    #23? Are you telling me, or asking me — because if you’re asking me, I could say that my anus is a cake-fest of rotten semen absorbing in to my blood stream; but I prefer to have my male patrons ejaculate in my eyes.

    Aren’t you so cute.

    Yeah, #11, I thought the same thing. But then I thought that #7 could potentially be a genius. It’s either she is a genius and is fooling us by acting like an asian spam-blogger, or, more appropriately, is an actual cyber-tool.

  32. absolute2

    Good for them. I am big Matt fan.I saw his profile on millionaire&celeb dating site “WealthyRomance.com” last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship he is looking for on that site.

  33. Spammers must die.

    It’s cool he’s breeding with a real person instead of some coked-up female stick bug who spend the entire pregnancy living on cigarettes, Slim-Fast and the semen of directors. The kid’ll be cute.

  34. sweets

    hope she gets into shape after no 3

  35. sweets

    hope she gets into shape after no 3

  36. Vinnie (yo)

    She was hot before she started shitting out kids. But Matt’s a good Boston boy, when you pick a latin for her juicy ass and freakish lack of sexual inhibition, you stick with her when she becomes a lardass. It’s a matter of honesty – everybody knows they blow up into fatties later in life, so an honest man doesn’t pretend to be surprised and disappointed.

  37. mamadough

    well he obviously has a low level of self esteem…fo sho.

  38. Gerald_Tarrant

    Is Ben Affleck the father? I saw Ben and Matt’s profiles recently on ArentThoseTwoFagsStillBeefingEachOther.com

    And just to make it sound authentic spammerish:

    Matt hair under does fifty happy billionairerich . com

  39. Hecubus

    Wow she’s …. she seems nice. I’m not even gonna say she’s ugly but she looks like she should be married to an overweight insurance salesman named Keith or something. She looks like your boss’s wife dolled up for the office party. I wouldn’t have pictured her married to ‘the sexiest man on Earth’ but then I personally always thought Matt Damon looked like a retarded incredible Hulk so I dunno.

  40. Keith from Allstate

    I’d bang her on the buffet table. Please pass the jelly.

  41. BecomeALegalCitizen

    #28, I hear ya. But see, NOW she can stay here in our country and not have to worry about border control coming and taking her back to her dirt farm in Mexico. Now SHE is the one who can hire all the illegal immigrants to cut her lawn and change diapers. See how that works???? Shoot, I bet the green card is coming in DAY now!!!!!!

  42. becky w.

    #29
    doesn’t matter if she’s from argentina, she’s still not white and an immigrant. if it ain’t white, it ain’t right.

  43. Claire

    #28 # 41 and # 42: You are a bunch of racists retards..

    MANY PEOPLE will choose to be latin and wait tables over having your pink and fat asses, red and swollen noses after a bear, driving a mini-van with your cellulite body wrapped on LL Bean dull clothes and holding those gigantic and ridiculous cups of frappu-nasty, while YOUR wives/husbands DREAM of screwing YOUR gardener/nanny on a daily basis.

  44. ubershann

    #42- Wow, i haven’t heard something that blatantly retarded for quite some time. I forgot assholes like you still existed. Seriously, shouldn’t you be marching around in a sheet somewhere like f*cking your cousin?

    #41- There was no reason she couldn’t stay in this country before getting pregnant. Let’s overlook the fact that she already has a child with Matt Damon, and the fact that they are married, but she was legally in this country when they met. She had a job, paid her bills, and is someone I’d prefer to have in this country than a small-minded prick like yourself. Too bad we can’t take away your citizenship, but I doubt any other country would want you.

    As for how she looks, yeah, she’s not looking so hot right now. But it’s nice to know that Matt Damon chooses relationships based on something other than whether or not the girl could pose for playboy.

  45. dariodali2

    La Chacha!!!! De Matt

  46. Anexio

    Hey #44, ubershann….

    You got is all wrong, you take the time to point what she did right but you failed to point out what she did wrong, so I’ll do it for you.

    1 – She’s mexican donkey fucker and she should have kept her job at La Ducha De Oro in Tijuana.

    2 – When she goes to Mass at St. Briigit’s in South Boston she knows all the catechism stuff but Father Tom will still kick her fat ass out because she smells like chiles and chicken.

    3 – You’re a d-bag.

  47. LIN

    what a pity!HE has a g/f. but i saw photo of his posted on site wealthydater dot com. i just don’t know why he did that

  48. Loser_Matt Damon = Ugly Lucy

    Luciana is soooooo ugly with no class at all.
    People from Argentina are usually very cute with close relatives in Italy, Germany and Spain but because she is Indian is like that. Is not her fault if Matt Damon chose her as his wife. HE IS THE IDIOT with no self esteem.
    M. DAMON YOU ARE A LOSER I DON’T RESPECT YOU ANYMORE.

  49. Choocher

    In the interest of life imitating art, Matt, I propose Beaner Identity, in which you drive this mutt off a bridge then replace her with Vida Guerra. No one will know the difference, and imagine all the Good Will Hunting for loose change and broken crayons between those pillowy ass flaps.

  50. alex oz

    shes not blonde , she not anorexic, she no suckdick fo movie , she latina, she s not dumbloook, she snot fakin matt damon !!

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