Matt Damon Defends Teachers Against Asshats With Admittedly Nice Boobs

August 2nd, 2011 // 153 Comments

Matt Damon knows what I’m talking about. Bourne Identity won’t even look down.

Apparently Matt Damon did more than just hilariously spray himself in the face with suntan lotion at the Save Our Schools rally in Washington D.C. yesterday – Frankly, I would’ve dusted off my hands and proclaimed my work done. – he also agreed to an interview with the libertarian who got their ass handed to them when they decided to make up facts because they seriously want the Department of Education abolished. “Getting dumber as a nation will solve all our problems.” What an incredible, innovative position to take. Via Mediaite:

Things got off to a shaky start, with Damon disagreeing with the interviewer’s take that the lack of job security inherent in acting acts as an incentive for him to work hard:
“So you think job insecurity is what makes me word hard? I want to be an actor. That’s not an incentive. That’s the thing: See, you take this MBA-style thinking, right? It’s the problem with ed policy right now, this intrinsically paternalistic view of problems that are much more complex than that. It’s like saying a teacher is going to get lazy when they have tenure. A teacher wants to teach. I mean, why else would you take a shitty salary and really long hours and do that job unless you really love to do it?”
The camera person then asked Damon, “Aren’t ten percent that are bad, though? Ten percent of teachers are bad.” Damon’s mom looked baffled. “Where’d you get that number?” she asked.
Damon struck back: “Maybe you’re a shitty camera man.”

Of course, the important thing to remember is that the first amendment took place here: The cameraman expressed his views, Matt Damon expressed his counter-views that he should go fuck himself and the entire world got to have a laugh. And not at this video. I’m talking about at our idiot-box of a country that somehow has a prominent political party running on an anti-education platform because it frees people from the intellectual wastelands of religion and/or cost a few bucks out of their paycheck. Because when you’re stroking out in a hospital, you want to make sure an illiterate moron is handling the pills. Not to mention, you get to watch the rest of the modern world pass America by as we content ourselves with Baconators, farting mall cop movies and not knowing how magnets work. And, seriously, what more do we need at this point that getting smarter is going to fix? I say we go full retard, and then we’ll stop noticing things that are wrong because that’s how you get ulcers. I watched that on a YouTube video somewhere. Without reading.

Photo: Splash News


  1. Veronica

    Thank you Matt Damon.

    A teacher

  2. Lazy teacher

    Those who can, do. Those who can’t, teach.

  3. Matt Damon Teachers
    Commented on this photo:

    We spend more per student than all but one country in the entire damn world (Luxembourg IIRC) and yet we’re barely middle of the pack when it comes to education outcomes. But yeah let’s just keep on rewarding teachers with the best salaries and benefits in the world, because obviously they’re doing everything right!

    Superficial Guy, stick to commenting on side boobs and Tara Reid’s plastic surgery, it makes you look smarter.

  4. sickoflibidiots

    Yea…let’s spend MORE money on education. It has really worked so far.

    Money is not the problem. Unions, Political Correctness, Wasting the day teaching gay heros instead of math and reading etc. THATS THE PROBLEM.

    The US is 2nd on the list of education spending in the world YET we can’t compete with the world when it comes to test scores.

    So let’s throw MORE money down the hole and see what happens. What’s the definition of insanity again?

    • Not you

      And spending more money on prisons has made the US safer too, right? We spend more on prisoners that we do on students and yet the US has the 8th highest crime rate in the world. Hmmm, must be the police’s fault we have so much crime (insert sarcastic tone here).

  5. Deacon Jones

    I mean, is it me, or isn’t it fairly obvious that the main reason the GOP constantly attacks the DOE and college educations is because their base and religious fanatics have a lower IQ across the board?

    Dumber people = easier to tell them what they should THINK about the news.

    • krutboo

      Yes we have low IQs – you said it. As opposed to the Democrats who constantly bash corporations who hire tens of millions of Americans, pay our salaries, etc. With 9.2% unemployment and a sluggish GDP, it takes a genius of your caliber to be a supporter of a political party that majors in class warfare and pseudo-socialist demagoguery. Thanks for vindicating every thought I have ever had about liberals.

      • Not you

        And businesses never, ever do anything wrong that drags this country into the recession in the first place, right? You must be a Wall Street employee.

      • Deacon Jones

        Hey, is fighting for worker’s rights worse than building a Creationism Museum with a caveman riding a Triceratops?

      • Obvious

        No educated person reporting less 250K in annual income would ever vote republican.

      • cc

        Like Exxon? Companies that rake in billions yet spend decades in court in an effort to reduce fines that punish them for their malfeasance?

        Or the investment banks that brought the economy to it’s knees and snuck out the back after having paid themselves 100s of millions?

    • cc

      Yes, it is obvious. The GOP and their most ardent supporters don’t just accept ignorance, they aspire to it. They find it an admirable quality, not something to be corrected. You’ve only got to look at their most influential subsetm the Teapartiers, to realize these statements are self-evident.

      (BTW, great post SF writer. Keep holding that mirror up.)

  6. Matt Damon Teachers
    Not you
    Commented on this photo:

    I am not a school teacher and I think Damon is right. It is a complex problem and the answer that it must be the teachers’ fault is overly simplistic. I would argue that you have to also blame parents, administrators, school boards, and state and federal politicians as well.

    If you want to compare school spending with other countries, look at per pupil spending. The US ranks fourth. I would also not that we spend more on prisons in the USA than we do on schools. If we follow Phaid’s argument, the fact that we spend more on prisons than other countries means that we should have less crime as well. Apparently, we have the 8th highest crime rate in the world. Hmm, must be the police’s fault we have more crime.

    By the way, Queen4hart, the median teacher salary in the USA is only around $40k (the average is about $47k), not $76k. In my state, which is 51st in the nation for teacher salaries, the average is only around $37k.

    • Phaid

      Not You: We spend more on prisons because we incarcerate more people per capita than any other country. Your comparison makes no sense.

      As far as per student, you are right, my statistic was outdated: Denmark, Austria, and Switzerland all spend slightly more than we do per student. They all outscore us on academic measures. We also spend 20% more per student than Japan, almost twice as much per student than France, Germany, and the UK, and yet we score in the bottom half of industrialized nations in student reading level and math proficiency, while they all consistently score well above us. So, clearly, our system is not working, and entrenching it by allowing teachers to gain tenure only creates more obstacles toward fixing it.

      • Not you

        The point of the analogy was to stress that is overly simplistic to blame teachers just as it would be to blame the police for high crime rates.

  7. Armando

    Was created in 1979 by Prez Jimmy Carter (nuff said) How the fuck do you think people were educated prior? Before we had the industrial revolution, the boom of American business, and the Space age and moon landings, since 79 high school grad rates have fallen every decade while teachers free rides have gone up and up and up. Kids are taught about gays, trannys and condoms and commies – American Civics though is banned and flying the fuckin American flag or saying the Pledge of Allegiance is banned in someplaces. UNFUNDED PENSION LIABLITIES are approaching 100 trillion dollars and they include a group or workers who work 8 months a year and bitch about it

    • Kurt



    • Knippy

      Can you give me an example of what schools have banned the pledge of allegiance and the American Flag? Oh you can’t? That’s what I thought.

    • MasterKat

      Quality of education went down when women suddenly had more options than 1) be a secretary; 2) be a nurse; 3) be a teacher; or 4) be a house wife. My test scores put me in the top 1% of college bound students in the US my senior year of high school. If I only had one of those 4 choices, I’d be a teacher.

      And since you think the good ol’ days were so great, I’d just like to inform you that the adult literacy rate In 1870 was 20% Yeah, let’s go back to that.

      Stop glorifying the past. The 1990s was our heyday so far. Every decade since and before it has had glaring social, economic, political, and/or humanitarian problems. Slavery, child labor, no women’s suffrage, killing off the Native Americans, civil rights abuses, massive debt, etc. Open a history book. The current problem is that America has a comparative disadvantage producing things that require unskilled labor. We have the resources to hone highly skilled labor but we’re not using them. Companies hire engineers from China, India, Japan, and Korea because they are smarter (more educated) than we are. Education is key.

  8. It’s amazing to me how people criticize teachers all the time. Where would you all be if you hadn’t gone to school or had at least one good teacher?

    The long hours include correcting papers and projects after school or at home, after school help and before school help. In most districts, schools are in session until the end of June. Teachers do not become teachers for the vacation time. Most teachers actually have summer jobs and part-time jobs year round. Some teachers spend the summer tutoring previous and future students. Teachers are also require to keep current on all education aspects. They are attending night and weekend courses, that they pay for out of their own pockets.

    I’m sure there are bad teachers out there just as there are bad bankers, politicans, lawyers and doctors but no one is sitting around complaining about how much money they all make. In fact, most teachers have taken pay cuts in the recent years because of the economy yet they are still there teaching. If they did not truely want to teach, they could have left the job once the pay cuts happened but they stayed.

    Why don’t we all turn around and look at our state and local government? Many are over-staffed and paid more than teachers.

    And for those of you wondering, I am not a teacher. I just don’t understand why people criticize teachers all the time. Most of you probably don’t even know a teacher or have children in the current school system.

  9. This video shows me two things.

    1. Matt Damon is smarter than I ever expected. He reacted to the questioning with a quick and poignant response and put the questioner on the spot.

    2. Matt Damon is an idiot. He thinks tenure doesn’t make teachers lazy? He thinks people teach because they “love it”? I know a LOT of teachers and universally they hate their jobs, but don’t want to give it up because they love the time off. He’s an ultra liberal douche who doesn’t let facts color his opinions.

  10. MIkes

    If private schools had to take on all the poor and disabled kids that the public do, they’d have the same problems. If teaching is so great, where are lines of super-qualified people waiting to take their jobs? I agree, though, that the Dept of Ed’s ‘paternalistic’ top-down system fails to address the real challenges of teaching ‘everyone’, not just the well-to-do, able-minded, and kids with parents that care.

    • Shmidtler

      If teaching is so awful, why isn’t there a single solitary school in the country with a ‘Help Wanted’ sign in the window?

  11. Laissez Les Bon Temps Rouler

    I send my kid to private school. I went to public school and had to teach myself how magnets work. Thank God I did, because now I can afford private school for the betterment of the spawn. I watched the video of his speech and Damon had a great point: public schools are fixated on standardized testing now that we’re raising a generation of Mr. Robotos who lack the ability to critically think. Only having the test drilled into your head is almost worse than knowing nothing. No good will come of it.

    tl;dr – It’s all fucked and I’m moving to Sweden.

  12. abs

    @welldoneson Out of curiosity, how much interaction have you had with the DOE? Do you work in education? If so, in what capacity? I’m wondering how it is that you feel comfortable being extraordinarily rude and condescending, without backing up your claim with any evidence. Please, tell us what tghe DOE is really about, as you assert that it’s not Dall

  13. abs

    @welldoneson Out of curiosity, how much interaction have you had with the DOE? Do you work in education? If so, in what capacity? I’m wondering how it is that you feel comfortable being extraordinarily rude and condescending, without backing up your claim with any evidence. Please, tell us what the DOE is really about, as you assert that it’s not “all about education.”

  14. The Listener

    I have to agree that both Matt Damon and the reporter made valid points. When I was in school, I had some teachers who you could tell clearly loved teaching by the way they would teach and work hard with each student and let you stay after class to finish a test and even answered questions you had. And these teachers were not so old they would have tenure. I’ve also had other teachers who were clearly just phoning it in. I don’t know whether they had tenure or not.

  15. Matt Damon Teachers
    Commented on this photo:

    The median teacher salary is not $40,000 according to it is $51,674 and that means half earn more than that. In Ca, I have a friend who has been a teacher for 10 years and earns 70k. The Pensions are outrageous. 90% of your salary….retiring in their 50s. This is all for 8 months of work.. There was a time when education was top line here. Then we had libtards slowly chip away everything that worked… replace it with their social engineering.

    • Not you

      Sorry but my statistics come from the Dept of Labor. I think I will trust those over Libtards? Of course it is their fault as they are they only one’s that have any control over education policy (insert saracstic tone here) Policy and hiring decisions start with local school boards, then state government and then the federal government. Which leads us back to my original point – it is all of our fault for letting this happen. To blame only teachers is simplistic scapegoating.

  16. blah

    I’m against whatever position that girl supports… she looks like a smug b*itch.

  17. Matt Damon Teachers
    Commented on this photo:

    I work @ a community college in So. Cal. and most everyone here is over payed and have full benefits which we don’t pay into. Our state is broke mostly because of this problem with state employee unions. They do need to get rid of tenure, I see way to many of the admin, faculty, and classified staff get their tenure then slowly get lazy and comfortable. Matt’s mom might not be that way, but she is unfortunately the exception not the rule. He is a loud mouth idiot that does not know of what he speaks.

  18. Matt Damon Teachers
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah, the much-anticipated Truth is finally out: Damon be Baldin’.

  19. Matt Damon Teachers
    Commented on this photo:

    Baldo, the new Member of the Jackass Crew…

  20. A teacher

    The US Department of Education gets billions pf dollars a year and doesn’t teach one student. Get rid of it

  21. A teacher

    The US Department of Education gets billions of dollars a year and doesn’t teach one student. Get rid of it

  22. toolbox

    the fish writer completely and utterly bested by his readers on this topic, love it…Damon is a complete tool and hasn’t had to set foot in the land of reality for quite some time, which suffice to say most that agree with his “opinions” never bother to entertain little things like “facts”.

  23. Flatulissimo

    More political commentary, please. This is better than Wonkette, because there it’s all a lefty circle jerk in the comments, while here it’s funny AND you get to see the misspelled thoughts of retarded right-wingers when they get offended that somebody somewhere is trying to teach a kid something.

  24. MasterKat

    Everyone on this forum can read and write. Why do you think that is?

  25. Dan

    I don’t think the platform of libertarian types is that there should be no educational system. I think they think there should be some choice injected into people’s decision so that they get the best deal possible for themselves and their kids. It might be hard to understand, but they are trying to come up with ideas to make the educational system better – their ideas are just different than yours.

    Also, people doing jobs out of the goodness of their hearts is incredibly naive. If I had it my way I would be drinking and screwing loose trashy women – because that is my my true passion *gazes up and to the left*.

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