Mary-Kate is jealous

Mary_Kate_Jealous.jpgModel May Anderson has reportedly gotten under Mary-Kate Olsen’s skin by hitting on her ex-boyfriend, David Katzenberg. Olsen and Katzenberg broke up last year, but apparently that didn’t occur to Olsen when she was heard launching into a shrieking diatribe on her cell phone as all classy 19-year-old girls do when other sluts get all up in their business.

Clearly sweet young Mary-Kate is just insecure. But I have good news for her, she has nothing to be insecure about. If I may, allow me to speak from experience. I once dated a beautiful runway model who just happened to also appear in two Sports Illustrated swimsuit issues, and let me tell you, it was a chore to sleep with her. Don’t get me wrong, the sex was wild, but the only way I could get through it was by pretending she was an anemic broomstick that frequently dressed like a hobo. That’s what every man really wants.

I mean, who would possibly pick this over Mary-Kate? It’s disgusting.