New couple Marla Maples and Andy Baldwin took a page from the Heidi and Spencer book and posed for pictures on Laguna Beach. You might recognize Andy from ABC’s The Bachelor: Officer and a Gentleman and Marla from, well, Donald Trump’s bedroom. It should be noted that 31-year-old Andy is a Navy physician and was recently voted the best Bachelor ever. The guy can probably afford to be picky with the ladies, so what does he do? Dates 43-year-old Marla Maples. I’m no psychiatrist, but I’m pretty sure Andy has an Oedipal complex. That’s fancy talk for: Dude hates his penis.
Photos: www.pacificcoastnewsonline.com
ZoomBoy | April 4, 2008 at 2:38 pm
His boardshorts are too high, what is he 55?
Wait…
cc | April 4, 2008 at 2:38 pm
first!
FromOutOfNoWhere | April 4, 2008 at 2:39 pm
what the dumb f@@k, in two years she will look like his grand ma. He’s definitely messing with that just for a secure paycheck after the navy.
Zim | April 4, 2008 at 2:42 pm
Technically, an Oedipal complex is fancy people talk for: Dude hates his eyes.
Sambo the Ass Pirate | April 4, 2008 at 2:43 pm
looks like some MILFy goodness if you ask me.
Jim | April 4, 2008 at 2:44 pm
please please please please PLEASE! keep going with the old ladies in bikinis. For the last story, over the weekend, how about Kathy Bates in a thong?
havoc | April 4, 2008 at 2:45 pm
She’s cougarlicoius……
He’s a naval physician?
Boy, when they specialize they really do specialize!
.
frooty | April 4, 2008 at 2:46 pm
sweet beachyness! check out her abs!
Barack | April 4, 2008 at 2:47 pm
He has an extremely caucasian way of carrying himself on the beach.
steve | April 4, 2008 at 2:48 pm
If I were her age, I’d be ecstatic to be banging her.
If…
talula | April 4, 2008 at 2:50 pm
He’s hot but he’s obviously wayyyyyy into himself that many women would leave him after banging him.
Conscience_Found | April 4, 2008 at 2:51 pm
Thanks, I enjoyed looking at her beaver bump.
Jesus is going to fry me for that one.
Gregor | April 4, 2008 at 2:51 pm
This woman has the sexual power of a lioness. Look at those flanks. She’ll suck out his youth and be boning 17-year old boys when she’s 55.
Laura | April 4, 2008 at 2:55 pm
Uh.. it’s only a 12 year difference, what’s the big deal, they look the same age. Women age better than men, and live longer, anyway, it’s a perfect match. My mom is 10 years older than my dad and after nearly 40 years they’re as happy as ever.
Audrey | April 4, 2008 at 2:55 pm
I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t be criticizing if the man were that much older than the woman. I know this site is called the Superficial and all, but let’s stick to the fashion and leave out the sexism and misogyny.
Randal | April 4, 2008 at 2:56 pm
Fish is stumping Randal today with this garbage!
First, we have some African American with stuff on his teeth making wine.
Then, we have some woman that looks like Hulk Hogan with breasts.
Now, we have this no-name, generic, “I pump iron at the gym” flop.
Seriously, I’m on the road to becoming bitter and mean… like the rest of you chumps.
Randal
You go girl | April 4, 2008 at 2:56 pm
Can you imagine going from watching ugly old fat Donald Trump taking off his clothes, to watching that studly young doctor get naked! I bet she thinks she died and went to heaven.
deacon jones | April 4, 2008 at 2:57 pm
God, if you’re going to date an older brood, at least date one that dresses skanky, like some divorced Long Island chick, not Susie Homemaker with the 1985 style fucking two piece
Randal | April 4, 2008 at 2:59 pm
We only got four minutes to save the world!
Randal
Auntie Kryst | April 4, 2008 at 3:05 pm
I thought Tom Brady was tapping that Brazilian granddaughter of some Nazi war criminals?
combustion8 | April 4, 2008 at 3:05 pm
he’s cut, she’s old.
Grunion | April 4, 2008 at 3:07 pm
Randal
can we make it 2 1/2 minutes? I gotta shit first.
Trover | April 4, 2008 at 3:08 pm
This dude was so boring and stupid to watch. He was a plain vanilla bachelor, not sure why he was liked the best. Listening to him talk, you’d think his brain was getting frozen mid sentence. And he is a doctor. I wouldn’t want him operating on me. And if he wants to hit The Donald’s sloppy 3rds, more power to to the loser.
The Laughing G-d | April 4, 2008 at 3:10 pm
One day you will all be old, more so those of you who live with hate in your hearts. I, on the other hand, release hate freely. Check the name, I am always laughing!!
Elliot_Spitz_On_Her | April 4, 2008 at 3:10 pm
She looks surpisingly good for a Medicare recipient.
FRIST!!! | April 4, 2008 at 3:10 pm
#14 – Laura – give your dad some truth serum and the first thing he’ll tell you is that he died a little every time he had to lick your mom’s pancake tits and loose, gray-curlied drooping gunt.
Alyssa | April 4, 2008 at 3:13 pm
I would pay money to watch them have sex.
jesus | April 4, 2008 at 3:14 pm
Hey #15…
You know the site is called thesuperfical huh? But then you go on to rail against exactly what this site is, and is called? You are so fucking stupid I don’t even know where to begin. Why don’t you swing by godhatesfags.com and say you love the site, but you wish there was a little more gay friendly material.
Idiot.
fygu | April 4, 2008 at 3:15 pm
He’s drop dead gorgeous. I would even consider going on that hideous show to get a shot at doing something sexual with him. Marla looks good, certainly way better than that disgusting woman who won the show. God, was she fugly (Tessa was her name I think)
fygu | April 4, 2008 at 3:18 pm
Hey Jim, #6 I’d like to see some Angela Lansbury bikini pics too!
minniememe | April 4, 2008 at 3:18 pm
reminds me of those photos that are already in the picture frames… from the ’70′s
Truth Speaker | April 4, 2008 at 3:19 pm
She looks a helluva lot better than Heidi Montag. Damn, I’d gladly nail good ol’ Marla.
Captain_Insano | April 4, 2008 at 3:24 pm
#14: I’d have to completely disagree with you. Men age with distinction and generally look better with age, women just look more old and tired.
Ugh | April 4, 2008 at 3:28 pm
I met her before, and she’s a stuck up bitch. What’s a nice guy like that doing with old lady thighs? Oh, and wasn’t it freezing yesterday in Laguna Beach?? Notice no one else is out there on the beach
Elliot_Spitz_On_Her | April 4, 2008 at 3:28 pm
#14 & 15 – Will you two play tonsil hockey while I make a sperm deposit on your intertwined lips?
Elliot_Spitz_On_Her | April 4, 2008 at 3:30 pm
#14 & 15 – Will you two play tonsil hockey while I make a sperm deposit on your intertwined lips?
Faggity Faggot from Fagopolis | April 4, 2008 at 3:31 pm
SHE’S UGLIE AND OLD AND DOESN’T MEAT MY PERSONIAL STANDARDS :P
HappyYummy | April 4, 2008 at 3:33 pm
:( what happened to tessa??
Sheva | April 4, 2008 at 3:36 pm
Marla likes the beach. As I recall, she was banging the body guard on the beach at night when she was married to Trump.
So she’s holding it together somewhat although she looks like she needs a little more leg work.
But hey, she’s still banging body guard types out on the beach.
The more things change…
Ted Mosby | April 4, 2008 at 3:36 pm
Marla looks great. I would most definitely hit that.
This guy though must realize that he isn’t hot shit because Marla did claim she had the best sex ever with the Donald.
woodhorse | April 4, 2008 at 3:37 pm
If Dina Lohan had a transfusion with the blood of twenty virgins then she and Marla would look alike. They both have chipmunk teeth. As a matter of fact, I picture both of them sitting on their haunches and chipping nervously away at some nuts. Like that guys’ nuts – the one grimacing and hiding his empty nut sack.
Picky and Proud | April 4, 2008 at 3:39 pm
She’s a bit long in the tooth. A guy like me, thirty-something, good job in data entry, no STDs due to limited number of partners, the acne’s most cleared up, high speed connection (at work) and a wide screen TV (at home), can afford to be picky. I would never do Marla! My woman would have to have a PERFECT body and be younger than me.
Sauce for the Goose | April 4, 2008 at 3:41 pm
And Ted, you know women NEVER lie and tell a man that he’s better in bed than he actually is! Especially the rich ones. Women are even more honest with rich men that poor men.
OC Dee | April 4, 2008 at 3:47 pm
She is a nice looking lady and it is obvious that she knows when to push herself away from the plate.
Cash | April 4, 2008 at 3:49 pm
Wait… I thought he went with the smart asian doctor lady. Guess she finally reclaimed her brain after spending some time away from his Guy Smiley grin and ditched his ass. Isn’t he a Navy officer? Shouldn’t his ass be on a boat somewhere defending freedom, not chasing menopausal women?
IKE | April 4, 2008 at 3:53 pm
Cut the guy some slack. He’s not marrying her…..just hittin’ it for a bit. She’s doable, so why not?
ph7 | April 4, 2008 at 3:54 pm
Nothing less sexy in this world than an old woman who was once hot.
Copyrighted | April 4, 2008 at 3:55 pm
#14 Ummm, That’s just completely wrong, but go ahead and keep telling yourself that. I’m sure you’re quite the cougar.
Just me, or does he have a bizarre looking torso?
morga | April 4, 2008 at 3:57 pm
great legs
Vince Lombardi | April 4, 2008 at 4:01 pm
It should be a Federal law – or at least an NFL rule – that every 43 year old woman looks like *that* body RIGHT THERE.