For the three of you wondering, Mariah Carey is still married to Nick Cannon and even threw a birthday party for him last night at Pure nightclub. I guess he gets one public appearance with Mariah a month, and in return she’s allowed to drain the youth from him then sleep unfettered in a hyperbolic chamber. Not that that’s a bad thing because, damn! It’s working. At this rate, Mariah will look like she’s in her 20′s by Christmas while Nick Cannon will morph into Redd Foxx and finally experience the indirect thrill of people recognizing him. Dreams do come true!
Photos: Pacific Coast News
Roberto | October 8, 2008 at 5:10 pm
F1ST
Deacon Jones | October 8, 2008 at 5:14 pm
Mmmmm, I love when a curvy woman who dresses like a slut.
Now can she cook, that’s the question…
supersex | October 8, 2008 at 5:17 pm
second question
can she suck a dick?
MIKE | October 8, 2008 at 5:20 pm
Third question? Will she let me bathe her and douche her, then drink her douche water?
I really love this woman. I would do anything to get my dick wet in her pussy.
I would do anything to her she wanted, I would eat her pussy, eat her ass, WHATEVER.
Jackson'shole | October 8, 2008 at 5:27 pm
Hey MIKE are you into crazy chicks with extensive plastic surgery or something? You sound about 13 years old. This marriage has really lasted way longer than I thought it would. I still give it only til the end of this year.
Mike | October 8, 2008 at 5:32 pm
How about you make sense of what you are typing. Sound? I didn’t make a noise, I typed a few sentences, so how the fuck did you hear what I said to say I sound like I am 13?
Oh and by the way I am in my 30s, and have had a crush on her forever.
Plastic surgery or not, you have to admit she is looking fucking good, and very fuckable.
regulator | October 8, 2008 at 5:36 pm
you know things aren’t looking good when your wife’s guns are bigger than yours..
J.Rai | October 8, 2008 at 5:43 pm
HyperBARIC chamber.
c.bloom | October 8, 2008 at 5:46 pm
Fuck, you guys are great writers. had to give it up.
CaptainMorgan | October 8, 2008 at 5:47 pm
Not to incite the wrath of Mike (4), but I cannot stand this woman. Mike, she’s all yours!
Jesi | October 8, 2008 at 6:16 pm
What a fat b*tch
mike | October 8, 2008 at 6:27 pm
#11
FAT?
What the fuck? This lady just has meat. Which is sexy. What the fuck you want a skinny bitch with all bones, nothing to get your dick hard over.
pistolita | October 8, 2008 at 6:37 pm
she’s not “fat”… she’s just an enormous looking woman. NOT SEXY.
pistolita | October 8, 2008 at 6:39 pm
it’s night time, right? why is this bitch wearing sunglasses on her head?!
rolacWAHHHH | October 8, 2008 at 6:40 pm
Nice shoes, Nick.
P.S Mariah needs to retire from the public eye. I’ve never liked looking at her.
rolacWAHHHH | October 8, 2008 at 6:43 pm
P.P.S – She’s not fat or enormous, she just doesn’t know how to dress for her body type.
That body could take a pounding fo sho though.
HorribleJudgment | October 8, 2008 at 6:50 pm
Geezus, is she enormous! Mariah Carey looks like a pig. I can’t even call her FAT. She’s too enormous for FAT. She’s gone beyond FAT at this point. And what is even sadder, is the fact that this huge pig is trying so hard to remain relevant that she was willing to marry a guy that looks like he’s a teenager. She’s like an enormous sex predator.
Her legs are the size of x-mas trees! Christmas is coming up soon! Also, look at her face! There is something pig-like about it. It’s the face of a pig, with discolored shaped eyebrows.
ass hat | October 8, 2008 at 6:51 pm
Hyperbaric you retard.
Rough Daddy | October 8, 2008 at 6:56 pm
There she blows!!!!! wonder if shes into a little humiliation in the bedroom!
Needledick The Bug Fucker | October 8, 2008 at 8:03 pm
Bitch makes my ears itch
Sport | October 8, 2008 at 8:47 pm
she tries way too hard to remain relevant.
packinwood | October 8, 2008 at 8:59 pm
Who the hell is Nick Cannon and is he potty trained yet?
plastique | October 8, 2008 at 9:08 pm
She needs to get a sex tape out there soon.
She’s running out of time.
Kim1206 | October 8, 2008 at 9:24 pm
laugh all you want at her body or the credibility of her marriage – she’s pregnant:
http://www.howlegit.com/link/link_details/mariah-carey-pregnant
johnny | October 8, 2008 at 9:32 pm
Mariah carey gets hotter by the day.
johnny | October 8, 2008 at 9:32 pm
Mariah carey gets hotter by the day.
johnny | October 8, 2008 at 9:32 pm
Mariah carey gets hotter by the day.
nikuang | October 8, 2008 at 9:43 pm
They are so hot….
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britney's weave | October 8, 2008 at 10:05 pm
21: THANK YOU.
she is not twenty anymore. who is she trying to fool? oh that’s right… herself.
britney's weave | October 8, 2008 at 10:08 pm
21: THANK YOU.
she’s not twenty anymore. who is she trying to fool? oh that’s right… herself.
booyah | October 8, 2008 at 10:38 pm
I ain’t racist or nothing but Nick Cannon? Seriously Mariah, what do you see in that nichelodeon fag? Wow… What the hell does he do anyway?
therusskie | October 9, 2008 at 12:01 am
All jokes and nonsense aside, I LOVE the fact that she packed on pounds in like 2 months. LOVES IT! She’s not fat, but she was slimmer before. Ha! Married life will do that to you. Especially if you don’t shag. :)
gerard Vandenberg | October 9, 2008 at 12:30 am
He’s familiar with the news?
DVAC | October 9, 2008 at 1:32 am
fuckin haters. Mariah is bangin’. She can do way better than this kid, and most of ya who are up on here are hatin ass females that just wish you could be her. Get over it.
METHODZ | October 9, 2008 at 8:50 am
Fuck Her & Fuck him… No one cares. She has not done anything good in 5 years. He has never done anything but be a CLOWN!!!!
myhusbandcallsmesquirt | October 9, 2008 at 9:08 am
Why are guys so attracted to Amazons? I truly do not get it. She is a fucking AMAZON!
I am not sayin | October 9, 2008 at 9:50 am
Mariah looks all that great but, Jackson’shole doesn’t like women, it likes Samantha Ronsen… aka pear shaped zombies with full blown AIDS.
huh | October 9, 2008 at 9:51 am
36- how so? look at her shoes, and she is still smaller than that guy. Have you ever seen Brooke Hogan?
myhusbandcallsmesquirt | October 9, 2008 at 10:24 am
@38 Yes, I have seen Brooke Hogan; I think she’s an Amazon too. Height is not all it takes to make a person an Amazon. Look at the size of her head. She has an Amazon head and body. And she may be a little shorter than “that guy” wihout her shoes on, but she certainly is not smaller.
hacksaw | October 9, 2008 at 11:20 am
I’d hit it.
jay | October 9, 2008 at 12:13 pm
nick cannon can play the snare drum and can’t read music. I hope he is getting PAID to be her husband. That’s one thing she does have is a FUCK load of money.
gotmilk? | October 9, 2008 at 2:32 pm
uhh, nice wedding ring Nick. did you steal that from Melania Trump or did Mariah give you that when she proposed to you?
MaoChan | October 9, 2008 at 4:12 pm
Yes, she sleeps in a roundish, oval bed thing. Not a hyperbaric chamber. Hire some writers that know not to trust speelchekkk too much.
TAMEKA | October 9, 2008 at 6:39 pm
ALL YOU CRACKERS BE RASISTS AND IGNERANT SHIT
i read my moms playboy | October 9, 2008 at 7:35 pm
when will she start filming porn as im bored of her voice
snackmix | October 9, 2008 at 7:56 pm
She’s still a pig too.
STevec | October 9, 2008 at 10:19 pm
she still looks like Curious George
Mike | December 25, 2008 at 9:37 pm
HER gunz are bigger than HIZ WTF! Hope for both their sake the penis/pussy relation isn’t similar, but knowing how it is in the recording industry, and what fists/feet/arms/legs go into various orifices to get the deal…
istiridye inci | October 21, 2009 at 2:51 am
you know things aren’t looking good when your wife’s guns are bigger than yours