Mariah Carey made Nick Cannon wait until they were married to have sex

November 9th, 2008 // 59 Comments

Nick Cannon is a giant sack of dumb. Apparently, he agreed not to have sex with Mariah Carey until after they were married which is unbelievably retarded. Nothing like going to your honeymoon suite to find out your wife has a penis, and you didn’t sign a pre-nup. Might as well start writing those alimony checks out to “Frank” and save yourself the rush. The Daily Mirror reports:

But Mariah says hanging on for that two months from when they met in February to when they tied the knot in the Bahamas in April was well worth it.
She adds: “It’s not that we had NO intimacy, we just didn’t have complete intimacy. It’s just me, and my feelings.
“I definitely don’t want to push it on anybody else. But we both have similar beliefs, and I just thought that it would be so much more special if we waited until after we were married. And it was, and it still is.”

Kids, listen up, not having sex before marriage is probably the stupidest idea in the history of man. That’s like not eating your last meal before going to the electric chair because you think they serve lobster tails in the afterlife. NEWSFLASH: They don’t. (But I hear there’s a Long John’s.)

Photos: WENN

  1. oshkoshb'goshdamngosh

    I just thought I’d stop in and say “FIRST”.

    See ya’ll later…

    Oh, and Nick Cannon’s a fag.

    and Mariah’s fat.

    Ok, I’m done.

  2. JSTFU


  3. Virgodoll

    If she was going to lie, she shud have stated she was a virgin b4 marrying Nick, either ways no one believes her

  4. Googolygoo

    She is so boring and uninteresting I actually lost IQ points for reading this. Why, again, do we care about “just” her or her “feelings?

  5. Sport

    She is so spent. Who gives a fuck. High maintenance irrelevant diva who dresses like a whore due to her insecurities.

  6. I commend Mariah for this decision, and I respect Nick Cannon even more now. The only sucker is “YOU” Superficial writer. All of ya are.

  7. Ralph P

    This just in: the wedding reception will be held in Mariah Carey’s cavernous vagina.

  8. Smart Person

    Did she just say she dated him for a whole 2 months before marriage? LOL

  9. xxi

    SPORT – you hit the nail on the head, buddy.

  10. Mariah Carey is a freaking annoying idiot, and she must hold some kind of world record for human self-absorbency.

    Two months?! Even if that was true it’s hardly anything to make a fuss about. And what does “didn’t have complete intimacy” mean? Is that some kind of crazebrity code for “dry humping only” or “anything goes that doesn’t have pregnancy potential”?

    Not to mention the general retardedness of spending your life acting like a ho, and then feeling like the Virgin Mary herself for “sort of not being totally intimate” for two months.

    This reminds me of the time I found out that people doing the 30 Hour Famine were allowed to eat boiled candy and drink fruit juice.

  11. I watch stuff


  12. Vince Lombardi

    He musta been the only one, then. Half my team is getting penicillin as we speak.

  13. Sueme's Buttplug (fell out)

    Yeah all blacks and part blacks are cool no matter how criminal and insane they are.
    Mariah is a worthless old hag with a giant ego and tons of money for making squeeky noises and boring songs.

  14. #13 this is about Mariah and Nick not me, and I don’t have a butt plug ok hater. Lame ass attempt at trying to poke fun at me though.
    I however did like the young, more natural Mariah more. She’s actually prettier with her natural curly hair, and with as little make-up as possible. When you have a pretty look why go and mess with it. If it ain’t broke don’t fix it…just relax and let it float.

  15. Sueme's Buttplug (fell out)

    Sueme, if you don’t have a buttplug I would suggest you get one and STICK IT IN YOUR MOUTH!
    Of course you prefer her more natural partially negroe hair cuz it is more like your own nappiness. Kinky and pubic-like. Very very primitive. Human evolution has left you behind (which is why black women have a trailing behind to remind them).
    Hater? Nah, just idiots. I actually find dumbasses like you amusing. Sort of like a pet.

  16. “Kids, listen up, not having sex before marriage is probably the stupidest idea in the history of man.”

    Wrong, it’s a great idea if both are virgins. BUT, that doesn’t happen very often these days.

  17. #15 that’s just fine with me, because everyone has an opinion so you’re entitled to yours. I will never plug my mouth, because this brain has a lot to share with the world. Don’t you agree though that natural is better? I mean you don’t want to get a date home just to discover that what you thought was in the package was real just isn’t real after all do you? The funny thing about you is I have no idea why you have fighting words for me. I have nothing against you, and if it’s okay with you I’d like to share my opinion too. Anyhow just like I prefer my own nappiness I also prefer brunettes to stay brunette, and brown eyed people to stay brown eyed, and for plastic surgery to go to hell. So there goes your silly little theory right out of the door. Man you must be having a bad day, and decided to choose me to take your frustrations out on. It’s all cool baby, and I ain’t mad at ya. You wouldn’t be too concerned about me and my comments if you really knew me as a person. Generally Im easy going. Any whooooo go ahead babe…have fun talking sideways about me. It doesn’t change anything but the time on the clock.

  18. Sueme's Buttplug (fell out)

    You really need to have a used butt plug in your mouth whether or not YOU want it. I guess this concept is over your head.
    Natural is better? Like black women not humanizing their hair? Letting it remain short and fuzzy and chimpish is better? Really? So the entire race of black “women” or does as we call em down here disagree with you.
    I know why I have fighting words for you. I just don’t like you. Plain and simple. I don’t like smelling nasty farts and I don’t like reading idiotic drivel. There.
    I am having a great day! I know that Obama will be out and disgraced in short years (or less) and our next Pres. will be…

    PALIN all the way!!!!!!!!

    OH, I wouldn’t like you as a person. So don’t try flirting with me. I only like attractive white humans. Animals like yourself are for pets, not lovers. Sorry not interested.

    Talking sideways? I am being straight up with you, stupid. I just don’t like you and wish you would shut up!
    In fact SHUT UP!

    When I speak you listen and don’t backtalk Massah Me, bitch.

  19. Mama G

    Okay, firstly, Mariah is a lesbian. the marriage is a sham, its all for show to raise his level of stardom. Can anyone really believe any of these celebrities have real marriages. They dont! they are all for show.

  20. I get it #18, and like I said it’s all cool baby. You don’t have to like me, and as a matter of fact if you want to hate me that’s fine as well. I don’t have to pay for it, but you will. Let me tell you a little something about afro hair that Im guessing you don’t know. If you’ve ever seen a black woman with their hair all matted to their head then they just don’t know how to take care of it properly. My afro doesn’t look that way ok, and it can be worn in various ways. I really could be a bitch all day, but what the heeee? Why do that when life is going just fine. Are you mad because Mccain didn’t make office? Im sorry that happened, but that wasn’t soley my fault. Obama wouldn’t have gotten into office if there were not enough whites voting for him. So my point is…for every person that hates the guts out of a person like myself there will be another person who fancies me. It’s hopless isn’t it #18? You don’t even know me, but yet you’re sure how you feel about me. Im with a white man…just wanted to throw that one in there.

  21. Mike

    …Finding out you’re gonna be throwing your hot dog down a hallway forever… Priceless. For everything else there’s Mastercard.

  22. Sueme's Buttplug (fell out)

    Your are with a white man? I dare say he is not a man if he is with you. I guess you will have dem pretty babies. Take some of that shit color out of em
    Yeah I hate you and your kind and it feels great! Your Messiah will be gone soon enough. I am young and can wait. He may be gone very soon ma niggah!
    I wish I could say the same about YOU.

    Please for God’s (the real white one not the witch doctor one from the Congo) sake stop talking about your disgusting aborigine hair. I hate it when I go to a public restroom and see little animal hairs all over the sink. Your hair is really genetically ancient and not far removed from that of an animal’s. Yech!!!

    Don’t flatter yourself. I know enough of you to not like you. Try to get over it, loser. Where is your white savior/bestialist? Let me guess (fucking a pretty white girl), doing something productive? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

    You really are sad.
    I am really happy making you sad.

  23. What an insult! did she make dereck jetter wait or that Mexican singer? Futher proff that all man are not created equal….Id spit on that pussy then stick it…

  24. SIN

    They had to wait that long for the infectious disease test results to come back..

  25. Do I have to spell it out for you. I don’t care how you feel about me or my hair. Im just happy to have hair. There are chemo patients who have no hair at all. You are so pitiful, and don’t even know it yet. How am I flattering myself? Im just spelling out the truth. We beg to differ with each other. I love me and my hair, and you hate me and my hair. You could litterally call me a nigger to my face in person, and still won’t achieve the reaction out of me that you’d be hoping for. How long have blacks known about racists like yourself? At least 100s of years right? So why now do you think I should care what your tiny little opinion is? It is you, sir or mam, that needs to get over it. Let go of the anger in your heart that consumes you. It only hurts you, because you’re thankfully not here with me right now to be able to cause in bodily harm to me… oh well. Better luck next time with the next nigga trying to get them sad and upset. Im a type A personality….so ya see it ain’t easy for strangers to get me all upset. NIce try though.

  26. oshkoshb'goshdamngosh

    Since when did this site turn into Racists Anonymous? Pfft. How lame.
    Going back to Bossip…

  27. Shannon

    Her head is always so up her ass it’s impossible to pull it back out.

  28. kuuuula

    new writers suck. maybe you should quit fucking dudes in the ass

  29. It is risky. What if her pussy tastes bad or she doesn’t do anal? You honestly have to wait until marriage to find out?

  30. Sarah Palin

    I wonder what he thought when he saw the curly tail. DOH!!!

  31. Ted from LA

    Oops. I signed in as Sarah Palin the other day to say that Africa is a beautiful city.

  32. Sueme's Buttplug (fell out)

    I thought I told you to shut up? The sass just bounces off those rubbery lips. (slow learners)

  33. jb

    i think if he got married and found out she had one hanging it wouldn’t matter.
    could you blame him?

  34. Alexko

    Wow, they decided not to have sex before marriage, but were so horny they chose to get married after only 2 months. That has to be the stupidest thing I’ve heard this month.

  35. Clem

    He married a chubby bird just so he could shag her and she’s wearing sunglasses at night.

    Oh yea, this is going to last forever.

  36. Blabla

    In my opinion I think thats what you guys think..
    its not true..i read in an article,man often mistake love for sex and
    quilty time is always sex ..You guys are wrong..!
    Sex is not the issue, trust understanding and all that shit is an big issue..!
    At least thy have something to look forward.if he love her, he is willing to wait
    and! if they were to have sex now, after marriage is just a bore..

    Meaning thy are having stategies for marriage..

    Anyway you dont need sex to show how much you need someone,having the person you love beside you is worth it..if sex is such an BIG issue just break and fcuk someone else…duh!!

  37. yleine

    Cute couple. They appear to be happy. But I saw his personal ID on millionaire & celebrity dating club^^^^^^MillionaireLoving. C O M^^ ^^^^ yesterday. What is he looking for on that site?

  38. Anonymous

    Yall are haters they are the most beautiful couple ever she wasnt a virgin she said it her self on some show shes beautiful and sexy besides shes not desprite like others

  39. This singing chicken-shit knew the blacks were winning?
    (GENERAL WARNING: even her TURD is unbelievible, folks)

  40. supersex

    sueme & sueme’s buttplug

    i think i’ll just fuck the both of you in the ass

  41. LOL

    @39. Anonymous
    I think everyone is WELL aware that she isn’t a virgin, so I’m not sure what your point is. She banged Luis Miguel, Tommy Mottola AND Derek-the-herpes-Jeter (who is rumored to have given the disease to Jessica Alba).

  42. Stan

    If a guy can wait 2 months and not mind no sex, then he is into masturbation too much.

  43. Sueme's Buttplug (fell out)

    Morning Sue. Howz vanilla ice today? Has he left you yet?

  44. amy


    i called it.

  45. Alicia

    Two whole months! omfgwtf!

  46. roses

    Sueme’s buttplug, you are obviously sad and very very bored. Please, do go and find a hobby and let people read reasonable comments in peace. Both you and sue are becoming very ridiculous. You have loads of time on your hands. Go and get an education.

  47. Queefer Bukakke

    I’d smack that bitch down on the first date and do her like it was the end of the world. Then I’d decide if there was going to be a second date.

  48. Sueme's Buttplug (fell out)

    Sometimes a nice person such as myself needs to eat. Then later there may be some digestive unsettling leading to a few nasty smelly farts. Then I shit away my food. Then sometimes I fuck and get vaginal mung and sometimes feces on my penis. Sometimes I mastubate. I do all kinds of things. I have a rich and meaningful existence on this glorious planet.
    I also love to make others as miserable as I can. You see, I was terribly abused as child and it manifests itself in my spineless attacks on nice innocent people like the unfortunate Sueme. This is a hobby. I do not want to educated as I revel in my own ignorance. It is indeed bliss.

    Now run along and drain some of the pus from your acned homely face. Don’t forget your grandma still loves you (she lies) of noone else will.

    Oh and SueMe, I will make you pay for Roses outburst. I will destroy you if you confront me. I promise to imbed my evil malignance into your subconscious if you are brave enough to face me here. ( I wouldn’t reccomend it, but hey, you are merely an expendable black “person” so it doesn’t really matter.)

    AIDS and hepatitis to you loves

  49. Queefer Bukakke

    Hey, Buttplug – Dude, your ignorance and little dick are showing through your writing. You need to stop typing and get back to screwing your mother.

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