Mariah Carey is really really good at throwing

May 29th, 2008 // 43 Comments

Mariah Carey threw out the opening pitch at the Yomiuri Giants vs Rakuten Eagles match at the Tokyo Dome yesterday, and let’s just say it was the most impressive display of baseball I’ve ever seen in my life. Lord knows why she became a singer and not a professional pitcher. Seriously though, you’d think she would’ve prepared a little before showing up. It’s like instead of practicing throwing balls, she decided to just break both her arms to make sure they wouldn’t function correctly. She could’ve dropped the ball and sort of nudged it with her foot and it would’ve been just as impressive.

superficial

  1. Stoney

    huh?

  2. Shep

    Well at least she looked good……… sorta

  3. BlackBanana

    Why am I not surprised that Mariah’s ball-handling skills leave much to be desired.

  4. fygu

    Can this ugly self absorbed bitch please die? PLEASE?

  5. nelliemosa

    What a bint

  6. HeidiHo

    That is why Jeter dumped her but not before leaving her with a little something to remember him by – Herpes.

  7. Man, the walking anime characters were a brilliant accessory to her cartonishness.

  8. asdf

    is she going to hunt anyone down because the flick showed up on youtube (on youtube)?

  9. Sport

    she is nauseating. Nice outfit for the ballgame.

  10. Irregardless, I LOVE this woman! No singer has ever approached her vocal range or level of artistry. And when she broke from Tommy Mottola she should what every woman should realize: you CANNOT let a man try to tell you what to do! Her life has been absolutely wonderful since she ditched him. Kudos!

  11. Sierra

    8 – nice.

  12. Rowan

    That is hilarious!!! Nice shoes, too, Mimi. LMAO!

  13. McBeef

    wtf??? how can anyone possibly suck that bad? for fuck’s sake.

    @10 – irregardless is not a word. you are a fucking moron.

    @10 – and you are not FRIST!!!, troll. you are a fucking 9 year old sack of dog queefs.

  14. nancy

    1) Did she even try?
    2) To: FRIST!!! … “irregardless” is not a word.

  15. tellin ya what I know

    She is so cute. She blushed after the throw flopped. Luv that MiMi.

  16. Nice

    She throws like a girl!

  17. Dick Bush

    “natsura wai kitsumoro ma kuti ….na heeeehuhuhuhuhuhuuhuhu”

    “natsura wai kitsumoro ma kuti ….na heeeehuhuhuhuhuhuuhuhu”

    “natsura wai kitsumoro ma kuti ….na heeeehuhuhuhuhuhuuhuhu”

    “natsura wai kitsumoro ma kuti ….na heeeehuhuhuhuhuhuuhuhu”

    “natsura wai kitsumoro ma kuti ….na heeeehuhuhuhuhuhuuhuhu”

    …the laughing will make her asshole pucker for the next decade.

  18. bossy

    I love mariah but nick should of teach her how to throw a baseball.

  19. bossy

    I love mariah but nick should of teach her how to throw a baseball.

  20. Learn English

    “Irregardless?!?”

    Please die painfully.

  21. Kelly

    This was pretty funny. I kind of feel bad for her though, it would be incredibly embarrasing. She needs to stick with singing.

  22. britney's weave

    does she realize she is not thirteen anymore? that outfit is embarrassing. she looks like she’s fucking off her rocker again. at least victoria beckham got the ball halfway to the plate when she threw out the first pitch at a dodgers game last year.

  23. WTF

    Leave her alone people! she just got old! hahahaa lmao.

  24. lunavesta

    well at least the crowd wasn’t booing the hell out of her like still-president bush…

  25. tallytastic

    lol. wtf,

    she does know she was supposed to aim for the pitcher, right?

  26. chopper

    I’d lay good money that’s the first time she ever touched a baseball in her entire life.

  27. wat

    why cant women throw baseballs? whenever i try to rape them they throw whatever they have in hand directly at me. fast too. it hurts.

  28. Kim Kardashian's Deceased Father, Esq.

    In Mimi’s defense, you rarely see Cy Young contenders on the mound in 4″ heels.

  29. tylor

    rofl!
    that’s how every girl acts when they throw a ball, and don’t throw it well.
    they look all cute and shy.

    but seriously.
    look at her damn heels.

  30. Margucha

    O_O
    i have nothing to say. im just in shock
    ………………………………………………………..*please die*………………………………

  31. She looks like a hooker. Seems her fake nails snagged the ball…of she’s just that pathetic at any basic human activity.

  32. Kim Lard-ass-ian

    How fucking lame?? Did she want to appear the most pathetic cretinous slut in the entire world? She achieved it.

  33. Kim Lard-ass-ian

    How fucking lame?? Did she want to appear the most pathetic cretinous slut in the entire world? She achieved it.

  34. ph7

    She better at catching balls than throwing them, apparently.

  35. spencer pratt

    I like the little bouncy thing she does after she throws it. And yes, the heels

  36. Spam Artist

    Irregardless, I think she is hot and y’all y’all suck.

  37. wooshga

    Nice – (FYI) She is a girl.
    McBeef – Sucking is probably the best thing she does, and don’t rely on spell-check , get an old-fashioned dictionary and check spelling, before you call someone a moron, so what’s lower than a moron…..oh yeah, dog queefs.

  38. SevanSins

    I could have called my IT Dept, they could have come over, fixed my computer, found out, I’ve jumped their so-called ‘firewall’, yelled at me for browsing too much Superficial, fixed my computer again, found all my downloaded nipple-slip photos, re-installed the firewall, have me change my password yet again …all before that ball reached home plate.

  39. Duffy

    Couldn’t they just get Whitney Houston to do it? I bet she throws 80-90 mph.

  40. wooshga

    Duffy- Whitney might do an 80mph slider, but it would take 4 lines of coke. They might get suspicious if they see her playing an imaginary piano all the way out to the mound.

  41. sensualeye

    I thought it was cute. She does need a new stylist but she didn’t look bad though.

  42. WhoCares...Really

    Mimi’s outfit was waaay too ‘young’. However, her legs and face and hair were fab. As for her ‘pitch’, she should definitely restrict it to singing, she throws worse than a girl, she throws like an idiot. Any, forget about her, WHO was that gorgeous hunk of pitcher she wasn’t aiming for?!? That’s who the f- she shoulda married. I mean if she was going to do the bizarre deed, anyway. Why settle for a scrub like Nick Cannon? So that he can be called “Mr. Carey” by all of us who genuinely reject the idea that he is worthy of any woman of any merit, whatsoever?!? That guy looks like a freakin’ kid standing next to Mimi. She looks like she could be his mother, or at minimum his (much) older sister. And she IS beautiful and hot when she needs to appear so. Problem is she lacks the sufficient quantity of class to pull off most of the looks she attempts. The hoochified Mariah is so yesterday. Go for class, sister.

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