Mariah Carey is cleavagey

October 24th, 2007 // 88 Comments

Mariah Carey launched her new perfume “M by Mariah Carey” at Macy’s in New York yesterday. She also stood next to a vase and showcased her healthy bosom. I’m sold. Order me 100 bottles. I don’t care if it smells like the sensual Living Tahitian Tiare flower. She had me at boobs. Will you accept a check?

Photos:, Getty Images

  1. HA HA HA…… Her face is like those smooshed kitty faces! I want to pet her head!

  2. HA HA HA Nobody can claim FIRST!!!!!!!! I fucking LOVE it!

  3. Gene

    What’s with all the makeup on her tits / chest. Are we putting putting makeup on our whole bodies now?

  4. Gene


  5. Superevil

    ….And still useless.

  6. Dick Richards

    I’d be willing to bet money that Mariah’s nipples are really fucking hairy.

  7. Gene

    Hairy Skoal cans…

  8. Dick in Bitch

    she’s starting to look like my middle aged aunt

  9. The bitch knows how to dress.
    The news vault has some pics of her in a purple number, Yummy.

  10. veggi

    Looks like she might be wearing Tom Cruise’s girdle underneath.

  11. freakwad


  12. jrzmommy


  13. Bigheadmike

    She seems so worthless to me. A Diva with no real reason. Although Boobs……….

  14. havoc

    Too bad she’s not “talently”……


  15. schack

    i bet she smells like candida albicans

  16. craigj

    Is it just me or does she have a nasty bruise on the top of her right boob, and what looks like a hickey at the top of her breast bone. Her breasts are giving me a bone. Nice legs too. Too bad she’s crazier than a rabid squirrel. Wonder when she’ll stop dressing like a skank though. My guess is 70.

  17. Meg

    The best part of this post is you were honestly mesmerized by her breasts…given an ounce of thought, she’s launching her perfume…she’s not standing next to a “vase”…that’s an XL bottle of the new scent!

    Love it!

  18. schack

    she is talenty- her voice rivals professional opera singers’ and her ornamentations are very tastefully and judiciously executed, unlike shistina.

    anyway- she made a lot of money because she put out popular albums back when people were still buying CD’s. lucky girl. lap of fucking luxury.

  19. Nikk

    I’m wondering what’s going to give way first: her girdle, that dress or her shoes? She must really think she’s smaller than she is…

  20. schack

    she doesn’t look like she’d be as good in bed as my brother, but she’d do in a pinch.

  21. “M” is short for “Mmm…. boobies”

  22. schack

    could that be needle-dicked nate speaking?

  23. I love how bitter people are when faced with a beautiful woman.


    Jealous much? Geez people.

  24. scorecard?

    Jimbo’s real name is Nate?

  25. needle-dicked nate

    the other day i had a gluestick in my pocket, and when my gruesome-tittied girlfriend sat on my lap with her big ol’ dumptruck ass, she hummed, “mmm, nate, i can tell you’re happy to see me.”

  26. moobs

    She has the typical Hollywood “i’m still a 17 year old girl in my mind” syndrome.

  27. needle dicked nate

    Schack, it would have been bigger if your fucking festering vagina haden’t made half of it fall off.

    Thanks you skanky whore. Hope those open wounds heal soon.

  28. needle-dicked nate

    awww, the old pencil-sharpener excuse

    the more you sharpen, the less pencil remains?

  29. JP

    As a red-blooded male, I can honestly say that whether she is crazy, conceited, obnoxious, or not; I would happily spend weeks, months, years pounding that A$$.

  30. schack

    well, I can’t help it that I have pus comin out my puss. I caught it from my brother when I was 12.

    Leave me alone!!!!!

  31. MariahLooksSmart

    Say what you want. Mariah is looking very intelligent. I want to award her the Nobel Piece Prize. As I hand it to her I’ll trip and my face will fall right into her mounds of Intelligence. Saved from falling by her bra. How smart is that?

  32. curiouser

    Hasn’t she been wearing the same dress (albeit different variations of) since, like, 1992? Jesus Christ, lady, give it up.

  33. nipolian

    This twot is crazier than a shit-house rat. Great set of fun bags though.

  34. FagHag

    Me like the small needle dick boys. They are so cute!

  35. Hey Schack,
    How’s it going?

  36. needle-dicked nate

    if anyone who has become acquainted with the aesthetic is in some sense unhappy, but anyone who hasn’t is a dumb brute, then someone with gruesome titties who denies or ignores that they are in fact obscene is just a moron.

    it’s like walking around with a cleft palate, claiming that all god’s children are beautiful on the basis of some brain-dead scheme of openminded equality

  37. needle-dicked nate

    some things are outright deformities, which place one entirely beyond the scope of the aesthetic, where the dumb brutes and fungi live

  38. schack

    that “pus” is the purulent substance called female lubricant, which, nate, i’m sure you’re so unfamiliar with that i’ll excuse your flagrant ignorance

  39. moobs

    JP – October 24, 2007 1:06 PM

    As a red-blooded male….


    First sign of insecurity is opening up any overly macho statement with this little fragment of an imagination.

  40. Time sucks

    what happened to her she used to be sexy

  41. JP

    dude. If you think pus is a normal thing in a vagina, you are seriously fucked up. seriously!

  42. greg

    39- wrong! that’s fucking disgusting. Pus is NOT the same as vaginal lubricant. You’re fucking sick.

  43. the highest compliment, maybe?

    The real “schack” is untrollable.

  44. schack

    what i was saying, greg and jp, is that nate is so unfamiliar with the wet female, that he mistook the viscous substance which betokens arousal for pus, another (admittedly) quite different viscous substance.

    44. that really is the highest compliment. i thank you, and i am honored.

  45. greg

    45- uh, that’s not what you said. shut your fucking pie hole. nobody wants to hear it. fucking skeezey twat. jesus, now I can’t eat my fucking lunch thinking about how you think pus in your fucking vagina is normal. *shutters*

  46. greg

    um i’m confused…. therefore….um…. shut your fucking pie hole…

    *brain sluices out of ear with a gurgle*

  47. schalack

    i believe you meant *shudders* you illiterate fuck

  48. D

    Would you all please quit arguing, i’m trying to masturbate.

  49. pie hole

    why is everyone being so mean to me?

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