Mariah Carey has a baby in there

June 2nd, 2010 // 54 Comments

Considering she’s looked it for I can’t remember how long, it only makes sense that Mariah Carey would eventually get pregnant. That being said, in no way am I suggesting she finally let Nick Cannon have sex with her. Ha! Who even thinks like that? RadarOnline reports:

When contacted, Mariah’s longtime rep Cindi Berger gave a rather cryptic comment.
“I’m not at liberty to discuss Mariah’s personal life at this time,” the publicist told, a statement that did not outwardly deny the pregnancy.
Said our insider: “Mariah and Nick want to keep the pregnancy quiet as long as they can.”
Which could explain why Mariah never got out of her Rolls Royce convertible during a road trip with Nick along the Malibu coastline on Saturday.
She was hiding a baby bump!

Or ribs in the glove box!

But seriously, it’s a scientific fact Mariah Carey is batshit crazy, so I can’t even imagine what the hormonal onslaught of cheating menopause with a pregnancy will do to her. If she doesn’t start walking around in a bear costume, it’ll be a goddamn miracle.

Mariah Carey Hates Your Eyes – 11.5.2009


  1. jim eh

    Meh, I wouldn’t hit it, she’s been tainted.

  2. Que

    Que grande por que si.

  3. Marcella

    Whatever. That bitch has some blubber in there.

  4. Oh Shit, I Said Fuck.

    It’s annoying when fat chicks think they’re attractive. NOBODY WANTS TO SEE THAT! BITCH, PUT THAT AWAY!

  5. cherry

    there’s absolutely no way that was natural. I’m guessing IVF. and I’m not suggesting it was Nick’s either. I’m sure the baby will be whiter than a nun’s caboose. if she’s even preggers.

  6. Anonymous

    Moo cow.

  7. Nome King

    She took her time having a kid. Isn’t she around 41?

  8. She looks like a cow. Does she have a couple of babies in her ass too?

  9. stinky mcpoop

    Her stomach fold is frowning at me, and that makes me sad.

  10. Rican

    Calling Captain Ahab!!

  11. Jimmy

    A baby?!?! She’s got a litter growing there! Mariah’s always been a large woman inside a smaller woman’s body, but she’s starting to blossom into Aretha Franklin!

  12. Why so sad?

    @9–hilarious. I was saddened as well.

  13. dfdfd

    Frightening – this bitch doesn’t have the patience and selflessness to raise a child. I’m a normal, well-adjusted human and a crying infant at 2am night after night nearly sent me off the deep end. Granted, she’ll have 1000000 hired nannies and the kid will be spoiled.

  14. i am

    i have to jack off now

  15. Nero

    I’ve only one explanation for her pregnancy folks:Sherman tank stampede.

  16. Tek

    Mariah’s looked pregnant ever since Luis Miguel dumped her crazy ass, and that was like a decade ago.

    Nick Cannon left Christina Milian and later Selita Ebanks for this. A 40-something year old crazy fat chick. I don’t care how rich she is, that’s a FAIL (it’s not like he’s Kevin Federline, he’s rich too.)

  17. Jones


  18. Darth

    Which Turkish oil wrestler is responsible for her pregnancy?

  19. sam

    Christ. When the neckline of your suit is so low cut that your fat rolls show when you bend over, it is TOO LOW. I’m going to pretend I didn’t see that side boob. And if she is wearing real diamonds at the beach (and she probably is), she is an idiot.

  20. Her body looks gorgeous, so curvy…

  21. Chris

    She’s just fat.

  22. A beached whale just came in. The whale has lost her high pitch vocal talents.

  23. Listen girlfriend, put on a one-piece suit and stop trying to be ALL THAT. You ain’t got it.

  24. Ben

    I think Cindi Berger is confused. Mariah didn’t say she was pregnant, she said she had a baby in her stomach … and a pizza, two Cornish game hens, a bag of Funyuns, 7 Twinkies an Iowa license plate and 117 ounces of PBR.

  25. Andy

    She looks like she’s having a WHALE of a time.

  26. RasputinsLiver


    Hey! Bitch was a porker to begin with.

    Now add some hundred extra pounds of junk food to satiate the cravings and you’ve got tha makings of a land lubber’s version of Moby Dick.

    Good fuckin’ gawds that skeeze is fat!


  27. Objac

    An overweight woman and a skinny black man having a baby? Naw…

  28. Just Cause


  29. netstarman

    Have you notice that butterfly tattoo on her lower spine is starting to look like a Boeing 747?

  30. FAT PIG!

    What a fat pig. She’s gained something like 40 lbs since her younger days, but she still tries to sell people on the idea that she’s some young tight thing. In reality, she’s looking more like Aretha Franklin every day…

  31. bar room hero

    looks like a fuckin wildebeast…

    It’s not 1992 anymore…slag

  32. Rachell

    lol to the guy that wants to make sex with this woman lol. and LOL @ 10.

    What has possessed this woman to wear this swimsuit? There’s no support for her national geographic saggy titties and it just looks gross…

  33. I’m going to pretend I did not see that side boob. And if he is wearing real diamonds on the beach (and he probably is), he is an idiot.

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  35. She should take herself well

  36. A&F

    good ! beautiful ! click my name please !

  37. good ! beautiful ! click my name please !

  38. good ! beautiful ! click my name please !

  39. good ! beautiful ! click my name please !

  40. good ! beautiful ! click my name please !

  41. captain america

    The Devil Must Be In Her Too, folks!!
    I’m absolutely sure…………

  42. Fuckston

    Where the fuck is Greenpeace? Someone has to de-beach this behemoth before it starts rotting and begins to attract seagulls and/or Jessica Simpson with one of those giant wall forks.

  43. Wishbone

    Two hour video shoot, followed by 14 hours of photoshopping…….

  44. rican

    Didn’t know Nick Cannon was into bestiality.

  45. gossipsgossipgossip

    She looks fine! She might just need to invest in a pair of Skineez!

  46. James

    She wears the exact same type of swimsuit that all fat blob women wear.

  47. KAG

    Man, that is one fat ass. To bad her head is to big to look down and notice she is fat.

  48. ahh what happened to the baby her husband

  49. Come come come to me baby husband

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