Mariah Carey Hates Your Eyes

November 5th, 2009 // 81 Comments

I’m gonna go out on a limb here and assume Mariah Carey was the creative director for this video because there’s absolutely no way somebody else made a business decision where the end result is her doughy torso in a bathing suit. To put things in perspective, Nick Cannon probably looked at these then punched his penis in a corner until he lost consciousness or was told to put on his tux and serve Mariah’s lunch. (I still haven’t figured out how their marriage works.)

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  1. sharon H

    She has always dressed like a cheap whore. She is very pretty and her curves are alright but her weight does go up and down frequently. However, she still packs herself into clothes that are 2 sizes too small so she ends up looking like a cow in rubber. Note that she is on her tiptoes because she doesn’t have her usual 5 inch heels available. She’s trying to make her legs look slim. It ain’t happening.

  2. Buffalo Dick

    UGH…… pic #13… gettin some Barney Rubble feet…. I would run like hell…

  3. Urbanspaceman

    She’s built like a sausage…with breast implants.

  4. Creepy Older Guy

    OMG! I’m loving it! I hope she balloons up 600 pounds. She’s been grazing too long.

  5. sunshine

    RE:#50 – you are hilarious! hahaha

  6. turd the third

    My god I am not sure which is uglier… her or those swimsuits. She hasn’t got a fuckin stitch of fashion sense. She is well on her way to looking like that ugly-ass coco chick. I am suprised she didn’t have a dozen or more pizzas on the ground all around her.

  7. lola

    She has a beautiful feminine body. I hate her music and the way she dresses, but this woman is NOT fat. I weigh 110 and think so just in case someone is wondering.

  8. See Alice

    Being morbidly obese is unhealthy . Mariah is MORBIDLY OBESE

  9. JoeDog

    This post and most of its comments are proof that this site is run by a jealous woman or a complete fagot. She still looks hot to me. Better than most of the pigs posting comments here probably.

  10. Don

    @84 If Mariah is morbidly obese, what would Mo’Nique be considered? I’m just curious. She’s not fat to me. I’d still hit it. Repeatedly.

  11. See Alice

    #86 Don A BMI over 40 is morbidly obese . That Monique might have a BMI of 100 she is still morbidly obese just massively more so .

  12. sharri

    Wait I don’t get it…what’s wrong? She’s smokin. Do you/your woman look like that at 40? yeaaaaaaahdidn’tthinkso.

  13. sharri

    Wait I don’t get it…what’s wrong? She’s smokin. Do you/your woman look like that at 40? yeaaaaaaahdidn’tthinkso.

  14. Derek

    “The cow says, ‘MOOOOOOOOOO…’”

  15. Not bad, not too bad at all!

    OK, first off, she obviously loves her nom noms.

    But really, chunky or not, I’d still hit it.

  16. HarryCherry

    Hell yeah, Id still hit it. BIGTIME!

  17. OH YEAH

    She’s so much sexier than the bean-pole, airbrushed skanks in some of the previous posts. She is damn tasty.

  18. Nina

    Here’s what’s gonna happen: She’ll say she feel so sexy and more womanly the way she is and that Hollywood has such unhealthy standards, then some months down the track she’ll lose it all…like ever other damned hypocritical celeb.

  19. ada

    Here is a very nice place ——- Cougarmatching.com —— It’s a premiere cougar dating community for older women seeking younger men and young men seeking cougars. Come in and complete your profile. Post a message, a picture of yourself and check out the hot photo galleries. You will find someone you like here…

  20. Hottie Lover

    She is still very attractive and she hasn’t done the collagen lip bullshit!!!
    Only catty women and gay men are insulting her here!!! No real straight guy would pass up sex with her!!! This metro crap needs to end. Women who have an hourglass figure or extra pounds are hot! Plain and simple , you eye brow waxing metros!!!

  21. get a grip

    #11 – they are not gay – understand that most of the kids commenting here are teens , so don’t even try to take any of these comments seriously. They are pathetic adolescent immature boys and girls.

  22. PsyKo

    ewwww

  23. Looks like a disaster. Maybe she’s hanging in a “Buffalo Stance”.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToNvjTrNlL8 (7-8 months pregnant)

  24. kait

    You ask, What happened? She grew up! She aged. WE ALL DO! Grow the hell up. She’s 40 yrs old now. It was bound to happen. Ive seen 40 yr olds look a hell of a lot worse. You guys are sitting here criticizing people and some of u look like shit in a can.

    I do not like Mariah carey. I think she had a much btter voice when she was younger but it was probably the choice of music she sang. Yes she is heavier than Hollywood says you should be. BUT she’s smilling, she’s confident, she’s HAPPY! And she has enough money to live comfortably, if not BETTER.

    I guess that means you HAVE to hate her. I remember before the internet, when people didn’t display their jealousy so easily. Grow up.

  25. Mariah can sing, but evidently, she can also eat.

  26. datroof

    The girl likes no doubt likes her food.

    All 6 daily meals of it.

    Seriously though (actually not really), she’s about maxed out for still be sexy while playing the voluptuous deva card. She’s just a few months of Krispy Kremes for breakfast, and pasta lunches (and dinners and brunches and late-night snacks) from Aretha Franklin-ville.

  27. Hey mariah is looking dam hot in that swim suit. She is fatty but yet she is looking stunning and hot. I love her killing eyes very much .

  28. zuzuspetals

    Good lord.

  29. @ 103 – i don’t think it’s the eyes that would kill you. just don’t let her fall on you.

  30. Jenny

    Huh? I think she looks fine. Sure, she’s not thin, but still very pretty.

  31. 3ringcircus

    Captain, I don’t think the engines ( swimsuit ) canna take anymore, there buckling. Seriously people come away from the extremes in these debate, one can dislike the coke-addicted anorexic waifs without thinking that very overweight and out of shape is the same thing as curvaceous, it’s not. Lindsey Lohan is not attractive, but guess what? neither is Kirstie Alley. Mariah Carey is fast approaching the latter. She looks like about 45 yo and with four or five kids, not 39 and someone who has never had one, and this is coming from someone who loves curves ( I think Christina Hendricks is a goddess. ) but that is not what Mariah Carey has, she has rolls. Lastly age doesn’t have anything to do with it, Monica Bellucci is five years older, lives in sunny Italy and has had a kid and still 100 times better looking than Mariah Carey is.

  32. Ed

    Honestly? Everyone must have some kind of screw loose.

    If you had a CHANCE to hit that would you take it?

    If you say no then I don’t know…you weren’t born a guy?

  33. Don

    @94 That is SO TRUE. Looking at Jennifer Love Hewitt.

  34. Turd the third

    I had to look twice, that ugly-ass tattoo (literally) looked like she went to wipe her ass and dragged the toilet paper up way to far! Geeeeze…..

  35. Allan

    I do not know what all your nay-sayers problems are, sure Mariah may not be thin as she was when she was 20, but she is still attractive and is more than just a good singer.

  36. Allan

    I do not know what all your nay-sayers problems are, sure Mariah may not be thin as she was when she was 20, but she is still attractive and is more than just a good singer.

  37. Dee

    hey # 4 you are a fucking idiot and I’m betting you’re packing a tiny little dick too. poor tiny dicked virgin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  38. Lucy

    so I guess she squeezes into those one size too small dresses after putting on layers of spanks shapewear!!

  39. Jimmy

    She used to be just another attention getting whore. Now she’s a chubby attention getting whore.

  40. Lila

    Normal woman size, fire the stylist.

  41. emily

    Now I am all forlovin’ yourself for how you arel
    I am all for curves on a lady as I have them and I am one.
    But there is something called where clothing and especially bathingsuits that fit you and flatter your figure.

    Yes, yes I know they may be hard to find but I am sure Mariah can afford a couple or 2,500. But I guess she missed that day when they passed out a personal shopper at famous people school.

  42. anna

    Oh, how disgusting.
    She’s a fat COW, people. GET OVER IT!!!

  43. uwish

    IF ANY OF US ON HERE STILL LOOK THIS DECENT AND HEALTHY AT HER AGE THEN YOU CAN TALK ,,….,,UNTIL THEN…… SHUT THE HELL UP AND GO BACK TO YOUR OWN LIFE !!!!!!!!! SHE LOOKS FANTASTIC !!!!! ANY GUY WOULD AGREE !!!

  44. uwish

    IF ANY OF US ON HERE STILL LOOK THIS DECENT AND HEALTHY AT HER AGE THEN YOU CAN TALK ,,….,,UNTIL THEN…… SHUT THE HELL UP AND GO BACK TO YOUR OWN LIFE !!!!!!!!! SHE LOOKS FANTASTIC !!!!! ANY GUY WOULD AGREE !!!

  45. uwish

    IF ANY OF US ON HERE STILL LOOK THIS DECENT AND HEALTHY AT HER AGE THEN YOU CAN TALK ,,….,,UNTIL THEN…… SHUT THE HELL UP AND GO BACK TO YOUR OWN LIFE !!!!!!!!! SHE LOOKS FANTASTIC !!!!! ANY GUY WOULD AGREE !!!

  46. uwish

    IF ANY OF US ON HERE STILL LOOK THIS DECENT AND HEALTHY AT HER AGE THEN YOU CAN TALK ,,….,,UNTIL THEN…… SHUT THE HELL UP AND GO BACK TO YOUR OWN LIFE !!!!!!!!! SHE LOOKS FANTASTIC !!!!! ANY GUY WOULD AGREE !!!

  47. Hans

    She is literally a cow.

  48. Ty

    Good God, the beached whale, “Diego” from San Diego, has surfaced again!

    Think she has hit the point of needing a “skirted” bathing suit bottom!!!

  49. Rosie

    She may be pregnant or taking hormones to get that way who knows. Face is still very pretty and she sings very well BUT no matter how you look at it the swimsuits are not flattering. She could and should switch the look to something that enhances her figure.

  50. yourmoms

    Wha? What happend to the hotness?

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