Mariah Carey finds acting work? How in the hell…

February 5th, 2008 // 58 Comments

Mariah Carey, despite a tremendous effort in Glitter, somehow managed to score a role in the upcoming film Tennessee. But when the producers wanted to ugly her up for the part, Mariah decided to let them know no one mucks up Mimi. NY Daily News reports:

Carey plays a Southern waitress who sets off with two brothers in search of their father. While she consented to cornrows, she passed on the fake nose and bushy eyebrows that had been conceived for the part.
“When she saw the nose, she called her people and decided against it,” says the source.

If Mariah Carey is cast as Chewbacca, she should just smile, put on the Wookie suit and be happy someone remembered who the hell she is. I mean, she was unveiling stamps in the fall for God’s sake. Then she made a perfume that smells like S’mores. At this point, I was convinced Mariah’s next move was to design purses made of cat food.


  1. Summer Kat


  2. woodhorse

    She should paint each breast like Hello Kitty and then she wouldn’t have to fight the blouse so much – she could just leave it off like she knows you want her to.

  3. Annabel

    Oh, I’m definitely going to see that movie.

  4. The Office Whore

    cornrows…. in…. tennessee. Is it a comedy?

  5. Madeleine

    That caption made me laugh out loud.

  6. havoc

    As long as she keeps flashing those tits, I don’t care what she does.



  7. melly

    isn’t this the movie janet jackson was supposedly fattening up for till they gave the part to mariah?

  8. nipolian

    Her heritage always confuses me…….she is half black and half Grinch right?

  9. Phil Mcgraw PhD

    Dear TheSuperficial:

    The last time I had a patient ranting like that about a big-breasted woman it took seven years and about 6.5 tons of meds to get him to stop screaming “It puts the lotion in the basket” every time a nice set of hooters passed by.

    Worrying about Mariah Carey’s acting ability is like wondering if a slice of chocolate cake has read any Faulkner novels. You just dig in and enjoy it for what it is, Sparky.

    Reading how you go off on Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Miss Carey and my friend Pamela and I am beginning to wonder if your winky is wired to the right brain parts, son, not to get too technical or anything.

    –Dr. Phil

  10. #8 no she is half grinch, half volkswagon bug..

  11. announcer

    We’re all waiting for the new comment from “OlderMom_1959″ … the pressure is intense …

  12. gits

    “Loud drunk chick at bar, falling out of shirt” now that’s the role for her.

  13. Ruby

    If they really wanted to ugly her up, they should have just taken away her make-up. Better yet, they could have just done nothing.

  14. woodhorse

    @11 Yes, sweating bullets. *peeks through curtains*

  15. Jim

    She should play the hot seductress…on the next Planet of the Apes movie.

  16. MMB

    # 9 (Dr. Phil)…My slice of chocolate cake last night had some really good insights into “Intruder in the Dust.” Of course, it was DOUBLE chocolate cake, and I was on acid.

  17. The movie is set in Tennessee and she is going to find her father with her two brothers. I hate to blow the ending for you all, but one of her brothers is her father.. Who did not see that coming??

  18. The Laughing God

    Hmm I always wonder where Mariah went wrong. I definitely think she is drinking from the same cup as Tom Cruise. Xenu shall claim you all!! Xenu shall claim you all!!!

  19. woodhorse

    @17 So who’s her Mom? It’s OK to say – I wasn’t going to watch the movie anyway.

  20. Sue

    #11 – I’d do something like…

    Just thought I’d check in on my window washing break. Anyone know how many calories and hour washing windows burns? I’m hoping it’s a lot lol. We’re having a realtor come in next week though, and I at least want the inside of the house to be ready. Hopefully she won’t have a to fix list for us that’s 10 pages long! For the most part I don’t think she will though, all the cupboards and closets have been decluttered and now I’m just doing my usual cleaning and some window washing. Any luck on the potato salad ideas?

  21. BunnyButt

    Purses made of cat food? Ooo, where can I get one of those??

  22. @20 Stifflers Mom, can I help you soap up the windows? Then maybe we can see how much room is in the closets..

  23. purses made of catfood. good one, superfish, good one.

  24. Sid

    In the last scene of the movie, Mariah’s character has an extended monologue…and then 50 Cent tells her to get the fuck off the stage. That’s the best part.

  25. Bags-o-fun

    I’m so happy I have an excuse to use my most insightful description of human nature in relation too our favorite superficial women:

    Stupid, spoiled whore.

    Yeah, I think that sums it up nicely

  26. Jim's Dad

    Jim? Are you here? You’re mom wants to talk to you about the incident last Friday. We know you visit this site. Call her house, she is worried, and stop looking at big booty women. Love Dad.

  27. is mariah acting any more harmful to the human eye than heidi montag bouncing around in a “music video”?? DAMMIT, why didn’t armageddon happen last week.

  28. BunnyButt

    Since this is morphing into a domestic diva site, any tips on getting stains out of my supposedly stainless steel kitchen sink would be greatly appreciated.

  29. The Laughing God

    Here is a tip, bricks make the ultimate time saver for house work!!

  30. AshleyandJaredsMom

    #28 -Mr. Clean has these lovely Magic Sponges that work wonderfully. You can find them in the cleaning aisle of your local shopping place. Whats so nice about them is you can use them until they literally fall apart and they clean mostly anything. They work wonderfully on my stainless sink and they get that brownish stuff off of the top of my gas stove too. (Great in the shower too for hard water stains) The only thing that I found they can’t do is take black marks off my kitchen linoleum.

  31. Julee

    Stop it with the domestic mom comments. I’m starting to get a really bad stomachache.

  32. BunnyButt

    Julee, a tablespoon of baking soda in a glass of warm water will fix that stomachache for you pronto.

  33. Rat


  34. vmane

    She is so hot. I have seen her profile with sexy pix on a dating site named “SearchingMillionaire .com”. It is for millionaires and celebrities. Her photos were certified there. I sent a wink to her but no reply yet.
    It’s said Charlie Sheen dated a very sexy model there before.


    Get your save Britney t-shirt


  36. Lowlands

    On the other hand this isn’t a bad idea from the producers to ugly her up.Having her uglied up makes maybe some other parts of her coming out more in the picture… I don’t have to tell her this but after all these years it’s all about reinvention,i’ll guess.

  37. Shallow Val

    You can’t make ugly uglier. Talk about delusional. Why can’t she overdose by accident?

  38. ST eve

    she still looks like that famous book-chimp Curious George

  39. ST eve

    she still looks like that famous book-chimp Curious George

  40. tom petty and the lipsinkers

    You gotta admit, she has a great fake rack! Not quite as good as Pam’s but nonetheless, attention grabbing…however, given the fact that Maria is batshit crazy I think it prudent to stay VERY FAR AWAY from Maria..she’s like a fuckin nutso bomb ready to explode at any moment.

  41. Daniman

    Eminem has fucked Mariah Carey, and he didn’t want to see her again

  42. It doesn’t take much to ugly her up. It looks like a desperate, losing battle just to keep her photo-worthy these days. Maybe not 10 years ago, but she seems to be having some trouble holding it all together.
    She’s younger than Gwen Stefani, with no kids. Maybe her perfume should smell more like broccoli and cauliflower.

  43. zoe

    So nice to see normal-weight girls/women.. like Mariah. She has an amazing shape. She is not too fat or too thin.. People saying This/mariah size is Fat has been brainwashed for too long.

  44. moobs

    she could play the “dope man’s bitch” since that’s the image she seems to be carrying along for herself these days.

  45. She has a couple of sexy boob…Is she single now? Her profile and photos were found on the millionairecelebrity dating club (MillMatch dot com) “She is very picky about guys,” according to officials of that site, “they have to be fertile douches orshe won’t date them!”

  46. jwdd

    If she’s such a nobody, who no-one remembers, why publish the story on here, with large cleavage-display pic?

  47. bri_fari

    sumtin just hot bout that pic, nom nom nom

  48. dagodfather

    Another star who F-ed her way to the top! She’s worthless! Can we deprot her? lol

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