Christ, when I first saw these photos I thought JLo was being attacked by a zombie. But turns out it was just Marc Anthony trying to force himself onto her at Ocean Drive’s Super Bowl XLI gala. Isn’t there a point where whatever drugs you’ve been tricked into taking wear off and you realize you’ve married a mutant? She could’ve married a dead hobo and it would’ve made more sense than this. It’d probably also cut down on the public humpings.
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Gisele Bundchen Speaks Out After Her Latest Controversy – Lainey Gossip |
 Lady Gaga Reveals Her Eating Disorder – Huffington Post | |
| Naomi Campbell sexy new photoshoot. – Fox News | |
| Vanessa Hudgens Falls Out Of Her Shirt – Popoholic | |
| Celebrities' Real Names Exposed – Newser | |
| No bras here. – The Chive |
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whackjob | February 5, 2007 at 7:37 am
r.e. zombies…see pic three jumbotron image.
nosepicker | February 5, 2007 at 7:39 am
Ew
schack | February 5, 2007 at 7:43 am
i think he’s actually trying to steal the mic. keeping Jlo in the attic proved insufficient to distract latino audiences from his rival…
sitara | February 5, 2007 at 7:44 am
And when he finishes eating her brains, she’ll be ready for Scientology.
Angry Ferret Jones | February 5, 2007 at 7:44 am
I hate her guts, yet for some reason I would still fuck the taste out of her mouth.
It’s hard being a guy.
jazzdrummer420 | February 5, 2007 at 7:44 am
No wonder they have problems getting pregnant! Note to J-Lo you don’t need Scientology you need to do it naked and actually penetrate, I understand you may not want to have sex with a mutant but if you want kids than you need to stop clothesfaqing
schack | February 5, 2007 at 7:45 am
p.s. he’s so gross…
griffmills | February 5, 2007 at 7:46 am
I don’t like him here
I don’t like him on HBO’s Rome
I would like to hump her
Lizzle | February 5, 2007 at 7:54 am
I have a feeling this guy has a microscopic dick. And when they’re having sex, he’s screaming for her to climax with him and she’s just laying there, wishing it was Ben and reminding herself to set an appointment the next day for a manicure. Then he spasms, making a face like a rat who just found a big hunk of cheese. He rolls over, exhausted and happy, and asks “Was it as good for you as it was for me, Jennifer?” I have a feeling she just glares at him, takes some strong prescription sleep aid, and says “I told you to call me JLo, bitch.”
MsMonipenni | February 5, 2007 at 7:55 am
OMG! I just spat my cereal all over my computer…that is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen…he looks exactly like a zombie!!
-Stormy. | February 5, 2007 at 7:57 am
Pic #2 – WTF is with that nasy “dress” she’s got on. Looks like something Whitney Houston would have worn back in the 80′s.
Pic #4 – Sieg Heil!
XeoRad | February 5, 2007 at 8:01 am
My wife says he is sexy. Of course, she says I make Brad Pitt look like an ugly wheenie-fag, so go figure. I guess I’m one lucky guy…
I think the fucker looks like he is dying (dead) of AIDS. However, I would agree with the whole “zombie mutant” description too.
And what about her huge, rotundant ass? I mean, she should be required by Homeland Defense to register it as a weapon of mass destruction. Let’s send J Lo to Badghdad and have her swing that shit around. Our boys’ll be home within weeks. Have her sing and the enemy will commit mass-suicide – let’s win this one for the Gipper!
gossipmonger | February 5, 2007 at 8:09 am
Soooooo gross! She’ll do anything to resurect her
dying career including becoming a Scientologist.
She’s a media whore.
hamjachok | February 5, 2007 at 8:25 am
i like her very much. and, unfortunately, the a fact that her carrer is dying is real
DancingQueen | February 5, 2007 at 8:26 am
People should never make the fuck face in public. Period. I don’t care if you’re a zombie or not.
Naid | February 5, 2007 at 8:29 am
AFJ!!! I miss your blog, Xanga fucking sucks. Please get a new place soon?? im going into DT bastard! :)
P.s – if Jlo and Zombie Anthony have a child, it will be like Suri cruise twin.. ALIEN BABIES INVADE
Binky | February 5, 2007 at 8:32 am
I prefer their vocal group – the Crypt Kicker Five.
LL | February 5, 2007 at 8:39 am
Wow, he does look like the undead. With a really nice watch. I sorta like her dress. It’s not the worst I’ve ever seen her. That one picture of them kissing looks like he’s trying to eat her face; won’t help dispel the rumors of his zombification. And why do celebrity couples feel the need to slobber all over each other onstage? We get it, you’re fucking, big deal, let’s move on. Either their marriage is a constant clash of giant egos, or their giant egos cancel each other out. Only time will tell.
pinky_nip | February 5, 2007 at 8:46 am
What’s the big deal? Donnie & Marie were doing these same moves back in the ’70′s.
serial snarkalec | February 5, 2007 at 8:52 am
He could fit in one of her thunder thigh stockings.
griffmills | February 5, 2007 at 8:54 am
Donnie was humping Marie??
PrettyBaby | February 5, 2007 at 8:54 am
#19 pinky- LOL!!
Alright wtf is the deal… it is sort of a “famous” urban legend that Marc Anhtony is very well-edowed, but damn that skinny fucker is ugly as a cadaver. She always looks good and healthy, Hey, maybe he is trying to suck the health/life outta her, I don’t know.
machinegundolly | February 5, 2007 at 8:57 am
ooooh my lord. that first picture is gonna give me nightmares. you just KNOW thats his sexface. ugh. puke.
Angry Ferret Jones | February 5, 2007 at 8:59 am
#16 – we’re all hanging out here, for now…everybody’s invited!
Jenster | February 5, 2007 at 9:06 am
he was just starting to look less mutant-like
these days and whaddya know, he’s back to
his shivering chiwawa look.(i cant spell that word for shit)
God damnit he’s one ugly fucker.
MissRandom | February 5, 2007 at 9:20 am
#23- His sex face?? 0_o?
J Lo just orgasmed at the sound of her own voice!
Now I get it … she just wanted someone to appreciate her as much as she does!
Troller | February 5, 2007 at 9:20 am
In pic #1 she has his johnson in a “death grip”. Ewwww
schadenfreudelicious | February 5, 2007 at 9:22 am
He reminds me of a teeny-tiny dog trying desperatly to leg hump a much bigger bitch…
elizabeththewellread | February 5, 2007 at 9:24 am
I will NEVER understand this unholy union. That man is disgusting on so many levels.
Peter Coffin | February 5, 2007 at 9:28 am
Looks like a miniature Frankenstein monster straddling a disco singer.
llllllllll | February 5, 2007 at 9:34 am
pic #1 what the hell is she grabbing? The material of his pants or his hollow ass?
PrettyBaby | February 5, 2007 at 9:37 am
He’s the palest Latino I have ever fucking seen.
Ossie19 | February 5, 2007 at 9:38 am
Her love life makes me sad. Knowing that you weigh more than your husband sucks but being married to a skeleton now that is just sad.
HollyJ | February 5, 2007 at 9:54 am
There’s no way he has a big schlong. He’s about 5′ tall with tiny hands and feet. MICRODICK, people… it’s called a MICRODICK..also known as the nanopole.
F-Sucker | February 5, 2007 at 9:59 am
Geez that guy looks like a chode.
BarbadoSlim | February 5, 2007 at 10:16 am
Ugh, now that’s some creepy looking shit right there. It’s best…..not to uh, dwell on it.
schack | February 5, 2007 at 10:31 am
isn’t ron jeremy really short with tiny hands and feet? p.s. my last boyfriend had very small hands for his body, and was nonetheless quite well-endowed.
but it’s cute that you think you can tell. betcha walk around checking peoples’ hands all day, thinking “phew, my dick is bigger than that guy’s!” nice try. hehe.
schack | February 5, 2007 at 10:32 am
isn’t ron jeremy really short with tiny hands and feet? p.s. my last boyfriend had very small hands for his body, and was nonetheless quite well-endowed.
but it’s cute that you think you can tell. betcha walk around checking peoples’ hands all day, thinking “phew, my dick is bigger than that guy’s!” nice try. hehe.
D'oh Eyes | February 5, 2007 at 10:34 am
YUCKY. He looks like Voldemort when he was that nasty pasty unholy-baby-thing.
Peter Coffin | February 5, 2007 at 10:35 am
#38 – Actually, I do that and up until now I felt a lot better about me. THANKS.
blahblahblah | February 5, 2007 at 10:37 am
You heard it here first—I give Britney Spears one year before she looks exactly like Marc Anthony. I really think I’m on to something here.
Giggles | February 5, 2007 at 10:40 am
A media whore? You’re too polite. And I always think that over-the-top public displays of affection (PDAs) are just a pathetic attempt to convince others (and yourself) “how much in love” you are.
Lowlands | February 5, 2007 at 10:43 am
Holy Molly!Skeletor has urgent needs!
schack | February 5, 2007 at 10:44 am
giggledygoop: agreed… remember michael jaxon and the princess of rock? shiver…
dead stoner: you oughtn’t fret, my pet. unless you do have a micropenis, the fact that she won’t cum without clitoral stimulation is her “fault.” friction is more important than pressure…
Lowlands | February 5, 2007 at 10:48 am
In the first pic,Jennifer is trying to grap and twist his little boner to back him off.
schack | February 5, 2007 at 10:51 am
well, i suppose you could be doing it in the wrong rhythm. rhythm is key. or you could be saying horrible things to her to crush her belief in true love, so that she feels only like a commodity. but hey, miracles are miracles because they are concievably impossible. the more you shit on her faith, the more it’s continuation is a true testament to its power. but that’s kind of like saying that God beats hardest the dogs he loves best, which is kind of creepy.
schack | February 5, 2007 at 10:52 am
its
schack | February 5, 2007 at 10:53 am
ei
Niecy | February 5, 2007 at 10:53 am
He looks like he is cumming on the back of her dress
RichPort | February 5, 2007 at 10:59 am
#5 – “It’s hard being a guy” your boyfriend tell you that?