Mandy Moore has ‘orgasms unlimited’

April 27th, 2006 // 65 Comments

mmoore-cosmo-orgasm.jpgMandy Moore says she’s embarrassed of appearing on the latest cover of Cosmo because there’s a headline that says “orgasms unlimited” next to her face, explaining:

“I’m very flattered to be on a magazine cover, but the horrifying part is my parent’s have framed every magazine that I’ve ever been on from the beginning. So there’s a whole wall dedicated to that and it starts off with me at 14 and ‘Mandy’s favourite colour is pink!’ and now Cosmo and my face and ‘orgasms unlimited.’ And my dad has to take it to the framer’s to get it framed. It has nothing to do with me – it’s just an article [that appears in the magazine]!”

There’s nothing wrong with being associated with having unlimited orgasms. That’s actually sort of a compliment. She should just be grateful she didn’t get stuck with something like: “Explosive diarrhea. The truth revealed!”

Source


  1. bone_daddio

    but she’s not upset about “touch him here” or “8 places to have sex” –> both of those are ok by daddy.

  2. Well poor Mandy, she should be happy she’s on a magazine cover, and not barefoot at a gas station like other pop stars, I’m looking at you, Britney.

    http://www.betterthanyou.org/

  3. SuperSpence

    Imagine my horror when I appeared on the cover of a magazine next to the headline “14 Ways To Make Your Tiny Penis Longer!” You know, ’cause I’m like a bull elephant down there. I am. Goddamnit, I’ll kill all of you!!

  4. mamacita

    Damn, Cosmopolitan is a magazine for whores. I swear, the only shit that’s in there is a bunch of articles detailing how to be a massive slut.

    P.S. I should know. It worked for me!!!!!!!!

  5. tlcccc123

    Don’t fret, Mandy. No one would believe you have unlimited orgasms because we all know who you are engaged to. That’s really the problem isn’t it?

  6. I have unlimted orgasms

  7. Geno

    It’s actually refreshing to see a hot star who has some modesty & class. Good for you Mandy! That being said, does Mandy know what an orgasm is?
    http://catholictvguy.blogspot.com/

  8. I'm in the nude for love scoo ba di booo salami

    I’d be more concered with the headline near her lowerbits [8 new places to have sex]. I had no idea Mandy Moore had 7 asses!

  9. brewdick

    this bitch is too annoying to breathe.

  10. Sodomy_is_for_Girls

    Hmmmm, she likes the pink and unlimited orgasms?
    Anybody else smell a TomKat wedding?
    Mandy Moore likes the pink.
    MMLTP?

  11. dirtypiratehooker

    She should know that by posing for Cosmo, there are probably going to be articles about sex (uh! gasp!) on the cover. What about the “Touch him there” article on the other side?

    Plus, it probably doesn’t help that the whole world already knows about her first orgams with Wilmer Valderrama.

  12. Good god, Mandy, you’re a grown woman. Get over it. Let some sex into your life and remove that stick outta your ass.

    http://www.wehateeverybody.com

  13. WhoSaysWhat!

    I wonder if they also frame tabloid covers .. can’t you just imagine “8 INCH WILMER POPS MANDYS CHERRY” taking pride of place on the Moore family wall

  14. colormeskanky

    i bet lindsay blowhan’s mom frames the tabloids. maybe she even copies them and puts them in a little book to mail out at Christmas.

  15. Italian Stallion

    8 new places to have sex huh…

    1: On top of Land-Man’s giant penis

    2: That Island we know as Edna Bambrick

    3: In Osh’s basement, while Osh videotapes it

    4: In the closet next to Ryan Seacrest to teach him something

    5: At a K-Fed concert, because really, what else is there to do there ( Ear plugs required )

    6: Whitney Houstons bathroom if you like some dirty drug sex

    7: On top of George Bush’s desk in the ORal Office

    8: On Steven Hawkins lap ( wait thats cruel )

  16. Sheva

    Mandy Moore knows about orgasms? Who knew.

  17. Spacedog

    She let Vince, E, Turtle, Drama, and Ari pull train on her ass. That’ll do the trick.

  18. Fisher55

    all i know is that “garden state” was horrible

  19. Trotter

    She’s just afraid of Daddy’s fragile ego. He’s never gotten her to climax before blowing his load all over her balloon knot.

    Poor Mandy. Her daddy has premature ejaculation disorder. PED. Hmmm. Sounds like pedophile. I’m onto something here.

  20. krisdylee

    Who the hell is this chick?

    All I know is between Papa, BigJim, Mamacita, Osh and me, there WERE unlimited orgasms last night…..

  21. saltpeanuts

    Mandy Moore has the most beautiful face I’ve ever come upon.

  22. jugsgirl

    Where will they hang the new cover? didn’t mandy just kick her parents out?

  23. TaiTai

    Poor Mandy, I know just how she feels. Every time I am on a magazine cover there are orgasms all around my head. It’s so embarrassing!

  24. SweeterSweeterBoyfriendStealer!

    DUH!!! the cover of COSMO???!!! what the hell did manly moore think she was posing for, a fucking chior portrait? cosmo is such a trashtacular, dim-witted mag that teaches you how to be a slut. which isnt a bad thing, everyone needs to know how to give head at SOME point in their life! / would NOT mind being on the COVER of a magazine ( thats sold in plain view, im NOT talking hustler or anything like THAT heeheehee!), especially next to a phrase that implied that i could make someone bust several times in one sitting. ok im done.
    edna!!!! ban me you ugly, haggard buck toothed bitch!!!!! GET BENT!!!

  25. You’d think Mandy Moore’s parents could afford better artwork than that.

  26. spatz

    #24…
    look whos got another day off of school. do your parents know their 12 year old daughter is typing such filth?

  27. mamacita

    @26

    True dat. I want to dip SweeterSweeterBoyfriendStealer! into a vat of HotterHotterBoilingAcid! She sucks. And not in a good way.

  28. @HotterHotterBoilingAcid, bwahahahahaha

  29. Populist

    Mandy shouldn’t be too upset. The Cosmo cover with Brittany Murphy on it had a line referring to an article on curing “itchy butt crack”. Kind of wish I’d read it, because my thong is chafing.

  30. Sassy

    Is it just me or does she look a helluva lot thinner on that cover than she is/was in American Dreamz?

  31. gammanormids

    Mandy, don’t worry… no one will associate you with unilimited orgasms… we all know you had sex with Wilmer Valderrama…

  32. chanel_bear

    @ 24

    who told meganharris to invite her friends?

  33. apocalypsist

    Not even I would hit it.

  34. hafaball

    Well gee, once her parents are dead they won’t really care…

    oh, is that too morbid?

  35. gogoboots

    I personally think it’s hilarious. You know she should really tell her parents she’s fucking Zach Braff, it won’t be that embarassing once the truth gets out, that she’s, sob, no longer a virgin!

  36. trulymadlydeeplytori

    she has nothing to worry about. i was sure from the moment i saw them together that phrase wasnt meant for her

  37. smokin

    if i was a superhero that would totally be my power…unlimited orgasms…don’t look a gift horse in the mouth mandy!

  38. Jacq

    I’m associated with giving unlimited orgasms. WITH MY MOUTH!

  39. Jacq

    I used to LOVE that magazine when I was in high school. I almost skipped Seventeen completely, with their “embarrassing stories” section, oooh! I think that’s why I ended up being a total hooker, a total hooker who is good in the sack – or wherever you want.

    #24 – I read it and I am – that’s why I knocked the dust off of your guy’s balls last night.

  40. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    I was on the cover of “Orgasms Unlimited” magazine once, but that issue was recalled and all copies were burned due to the death-by-testicular-explosion suffered by millions of readers.
    “Orgasms Unlimited” is a fine publication that can be found referenced in many distinguished collegiate publications and abandoned, soggy, and torn on rooftops and roadsides. Subscribe today.

  41. St.Minutia

    Osh, where can I get a subscription to that? And can I be on the cover, too. I am spectacular!

  42. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    41 – I will try to pull some strings to see if I can get you on “Black Men With Circus Penises Penetrating Tight Young Asian Lolitas”, but I can’t make any promises.

  43. Iambananas

    I bought that issue! lol… it didn’t make me think that was about her… if you won’t want something sexual on the cover of a mazagene you’re on… try not going on cosmo… it’s all about s-e-x.

  44. Edna Bambrick

    I am reporting all disgusting posts.

  45. Sodomy_is_for_Girls

    Edna, are you a girl?

  46. Edna Bambrick

    # 4, 9, 12, 13, 15, 19, 24, 35, 38, 39, 42 you are reported.

  47. Edna Bambrick

    #45: You are reported.

  48. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    46 – I already reported you first, so it’s too late.

  49. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    46 – Assfuck milk.

  50. Mandy Moore was funny on Scrubs.

    P.S. Edna’s a whore.

Leave A Comment