TLC Will Pay Kids In Full For ‘Honey Boo Boo’ Episodes, Not Mama June

“Who wants sketti, y’all?”

Exactly everything coming out of the Mama June Shannon dating the man who molested her daughter situation has been God-fucking-awful, so it’s refreshing to finally see some good news even if it doesn’t involve the words a Southern sheriff saying “Boy, fetch me mah elephant gun.” There’s still time. TMZ reports:

Sources familiar with the situation tell TMZ … TLC’s biggest concern is the welfare of Honey Boo Boo and the other kids and show execs are deeply concerned and upset that June has put them at risk by dating convicted child molester Mark McDaniel.
The network does not believe June deserves full payment, so they have deducted a significant amount from what she would have gotten if the show aired.
As for the kids … we’re told they will ALL be paid in full

As for how TLC can get away with paying June less, there’s a morality clause in her contract which I’m pretty sure covers fucking the pedophile who already molested one of your daughters and is clearly trying to get his hands on another one. There’s really not a whole lot of gray area on that one, and I just spent my entire morning reading and writing about Lena Dunham’s little sister’s vagina, so trust me, I unfortunately know what I’m talking about. And am probably going to start smoking again because of it. *lights two cigarettes* Do you think the next world will be less kid-rapey? — Me too. *lights up third*

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Photo: New Line Cinema (h/t Johnny Barbells)