Madonna’s flings threaten her adoption plans

Madonna’s relationships with Jesus Luz and Alex “A-Rod” Rodriguez have thrown a wrench into her plans to adopt three-year-old Mercy from Malawi. NY Daily News reports:

“The news she is linked to another woman’s husband and a young man less than half her age makes us question her morals.”
Officials are unhappy the 50-year-old Material Mom, who adopted toddler David Banda in Malawi in 2006, flaunted her relationship with Luz in a recent racy W Magazine spread.
Simon Chisale, Malawi’s child welfare chief, said morality plays a big part in the adoption process.
“We do not only look at the material issues, but also the moral standing of prospective adoptive parents, because we do not want our children’s morals to be corrupted,” Chisale said.

When reached for comment, Madonna responded by sprouting leather wings and flying off into the air. She was last seen over the Atlantic carrying a small African child in her talons. In related news, the entire country of Malawi is still engulfed in flames this morning…