Madonna vs. Horse: The Battle Continues

April 19th, 2009 // 38 Comments

Failing to heed the warning from her 2005 injury, Madonna got her ass kicked by another horse yesterday, according to the New York Post:

The Material Mom, who suffered broken bones in a similar accident three years ago, was leaping over hurdles on a brown steed on the East End spread when she bit the dust just before 4:30 p.m.
In the wake of the titanic tumble, more than 10 people, including her Brazilian boy toy Jesus Luz, 22, rushed to her side.
Rescue workers, who arrived minutes later, scooped up the “Like a Virgin” songstress and gingerly carried her on a backboard to a waiting ambulance, which raced to Southampton Hospital.
She suffered only minor injuries and bruises but will have further tests and will remain under doctor’s observations, her spokeswoman said.

Jesus. When are her people going to learn that if you place what’s technically a cadaver on top of a horse you’re going to spook the hell out of it? Even I know that and the closest I’ve been to an actual farm is the marijuana greenhouse in my backyard. — I mean, the neighbor’s backyard. I’m too beautiful for prison!

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Comments (38)

  1. Zee Brat | April 19, 2009 at 11:52 am

    That was a horribly written quotation there.

    madonna vs horse, who shall come out on top?

    Reply
  2. brunoo | April 19, 2009 at 11:55 am

    u guys are disgusting.what ur problem about her age???she is 50 and has a job and looks amazing.wasnt her fault.was the fucking paparazzi.we all get 50 someday and its hard to get old.madonna ate least has a job and a good one and looks great.she is a genious woman.she deserves all the respect.she is the only thing good that we have in music business today.the only person that really works.and she has millions of fans.u are a stupid slut.jealous much???

    Reply
  3. kk | April 19, 2009 at 11:58 am

    look at madonna on give it 2 me video she looks hot.she is really hot.she is immortal.she worls and millions of people love her work.her shows are always sold out.and it wont happen to other stars.cause madonna is madonna

    Reply
  4. mini | April 19, 2009 at 12:01 pm

    get well madonna.we are supporting u.u are amazing.ur show was huge.u have something really special

    Reply
  5. Eh | April 19, 2009 at 12:03 pm

    Madonna wouldn’t look so ridiculous if she didn’t fight her age so much. She looked a helluva lot better before she had those ridiculous cheek implants put in and when her body was softer, not so hard and sinewy.

    If all these women could look at Lauren Hutton as a way to age gracefully–even though I’m sure she might have had a little bit of work done here and there. But yeah, she’s got some lines. And while she’s in great shape, she doesn’t look hard and…masculine.

    Reply
  6. madgesty | April 19, 2009 at 12:03 pm

    ur nasty madonna is gold

    Reply
  7. Nero | April 19, 2009 at 12:29 pm

    Holy crap! What happened?

    Reply
  8. Darth | April 19, 2009 at 12:33 pm

    Is everything allright? With the horse?

    Reply
  9. sirrix | April 19, 2009 at 12:36 pm

    @2: Looking forward to your upcoming movie.

    Reply
  10. Gando | April 19, 2009 at 12:37 pm

    She must have a good karma.She didn’t break anything.

    Reply
  11. Galtacticus | April 19, 2009 at 12:44 pm

    Boo! I think this is a good omen.If there was any curse on her. . .

    Reply
  12. Sauron | April 19, 2009 at 12:49 pm

    I’m looking in my crystal globe and i see what happened. . .

    Reply
  13. Kia | April 19, 2009 at 12:50 pm

    Faling from horse injury = excuse to be at the hospital for some convenient plastic surgery. I’m like a real conspiracy theorist! :-P

    Reply
  14. Sauron | April 19, 2009 at 12:56 pm

    I’m dressed now in a dark monk’s habit and i’m trying to find out if or what this curse is all about. . .

    Reply
  15. brunokkmini | April 19, 2009 at 1:01 pm

    From the looks of it, comments 2, 3 & 4 are all from the same person. Lovely to have such devoted fans in one\’s dotage, even if the fans are batshit insane and have problems with basic spelling.

    Reply
  16. Rhialto | April 19, 2009 at 1:06 pm

    Any paps involved playing hide-n-seek?

    Reply
  17. Asian Girl | April 19, 2009 at 1:19 pm

    Great blog !

    Reply
  18. mikeock | April 19, 2009 at 1:40 pm

    Christopher Reeve called from heaven. He’s babbling on about how life is totally unfair. What’s that Chris? Her spine is made out of magic red Kaballah string?

    That explains a lot.

    Reply
  19. Vince Lombardi | April 19, 2009 at 2:34 pm

    Did she wet herself in those photos?

    Reply
  20. Alita | April 19, 2009 at 4:15 pm

    most riding falls don’t warrant anything aside from getting back on the horse…I’d hate to be so goddamn precious that an ambulance is called every time I bail out. “Failing to heed the warning…”? A good rider doesn’t quit because of a broken hand! Kudos to M for not giving up.

    Reply
  21. unbeliever | April 19, 2009 at 4:46 pm

    What is with all the retards posting here using sms-speak, no capitalization and poor spelling? I guess this is Madonna’s current demographic. Kudos to her, however, for keeping on tearing it up in a healthy (by celebrity standards) activity … way better than endless drug / alchohol binges…

    Reply
  22. Fuck U | April 19, 2009 at 4:50 pm

    Hahahahhaa,
    Her old ass needs to go sit the fuck down somewhere, next time I hope she breaks her fucking neck.

    Reply
  23. Yikes | April 19, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    Hmm she’s hiding something under that ugly hat of hers… looks like Freddy Krueger’s making a comeback after all!!!

    Reply
  24. Charley Kane | April 19, 2009 at 6:49 pm

    She should try riding on harder surfaces.

    Reply
  25. Aunt Jemima | April 19, 2009 at 6:53 pm

    Madonna misses Dennis Rodman’s grotesque penis and decided to fuck the horse. Good thing the horse knew better.

    Reply
  26. joy | April 19, 2009 at 8:03 pm

    Hey, did Madonna drop her panty liner in photo 6 & 7?

    Reply
  27. Miss Brown Eyes | April 19, 2009 at 8:43 pm

    Intelligent horses 2
    Skeletor 0

    Reply
  28. humpinfrog | April 19, 2009 at 8:56 pm

    She looks like she’s been beaten around the face and/or cheeks. And what’s up with her hand? My “Garden Weasel” couldn’t dig through dirt faster! It might even beat a mule and plow. I let you know when my tests are completed.

    Reply
  29. HankTheDwarf | April 19, 2009 at 8:56 pm

    Did she pee her pants?

    It looks like she peed her pants.

    Reply
  30. jonny | April 19, 2009 at 10:43 pm

    So…she only fell off the horse this time because of the horrible paparazzi!!!!!???? Well, that must mean that the horrible paparazzi snapped all kinds of delicious photos of her falling and writhing on the ground……right? I can’t wait to see those photos……..waiting……….still waiting…………….still waiting……………….

    Reply
  31. gerard Vandenberg | April 20, 2009 at 12:41 am

    americans really require more facts she LOST, folks?

    Reply
  32. dude | April 20, 2009 at 9:33 am

    wonder if she was drunk like christopher reeves when he had his accident (yup i know ppl who were there). madonna hasn’t been worth a double take since like a virgin. didn’t she pass the torch to brit… fade away already

    Reply
  33. salawhite | April 20, 2009 at 10:08 am

    Recently I found a hot club — S e e k i n g t a l l . c o m — just for sexy tall gals and guys to find their cupid. Come on, tall singles. Don’t miss your love.

    Reply
  34. Darth | April 20, 2009 at 10:20 am

    Boo! Yeah maybe there’s a spell on her. . .

    Reply
  35. Annie Nonymous | April 20, 2009 at 12:28 pm

    @ HanktheDwarf

    She’s wearing full-seat breeches. The dark part is suede (or a suedelike fabric), which (generally) gives you better grip in the saddle.

    Reply
  36. kineticanne | April 20, 2009 at 9:15 pm

    i concur, at first glance i was sure this had to do with her wetting her pants on a horse.
    poor horse.

    Reply
  37. Madonna's Old Ass | April 21, 2009 at 2:35 pm

    Leave Madonna alone!
    She’s not old!

    Sincerely,
    Dust

    Reply
  38. herbiefrog | April 22, 2009 at 10:38 pm

    lol babes : ) )

    [don't explain...]

    welcome to the here and now…#

    [check]

    what ?

    oh… they keep doing that…

    something comeing soon…

    let’s just listen…

    ?

    : )

    s h h h . . . : ) [exactly]

    Reply

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