Even though she possesses the Hands of Death, Madonna is surprisingly not welcome in the Hamptons, according to Page Six:
A couple of weekends ago, Madonna, who recently signed a contract for a townhouse on East 81st Street, stayed at the beautiful Wolffer Estate Vineyards in Sagaponack. But our sources report she wasn’t interested in buying the 12,000-square-foot, Tuscan-style villa and 100 acres, which have been on the market since the winery’s well-liked founder, Christian Wolffer, died in a freak boating accident in Brazil on New Year’s Eve — she just wanted to board her horses at the winery’s stables.
Madonna then presented the estate with a 10-page list of demands, according to our source. Among the stipulations were that “no one could be in the riding ring at the same time she was. It was laughable. They turned her down flat.”
This naturally resulted in Madonna taking to the air and breathing fire upon a nearby Crate and Barrel until a suitable number of Lexuses were sacrificed in her honor.