Madonna officially on the road to adoption

October 12th, 2006 // 50 Comments

A senior court official announced today that Malawi authorities granted Madonna an interim order to adopt a child, meaning there will be a subsequent hearing to determine whether she’ll be allowed to adopt the child or not.

Under Malawian law the hearing must take place within two years. “This also means that she has been put on observer status to see how she will relate to the child, and people from social welfare will have to observe that. The court will depend upon their observations to make a final decision,” Ligowe added.

Considering the child is coming from extreme poverty and Madonna is one of the richest humans on the planet, the only way she would be denied the adoption is if they discovered a sweatshop in her basement or a cookbook in her kitchen on how to prepare human.


  1. gag_me_with_a_pitchfork

    Observing Madonna wouldn’t be such a bad job, all things considered.

  2. jrzmommy

    Dear Dept. of Child Services in Malawi:

    I respectfully forward the enclosed copy of “Sex” by Madonna for your perusal.

    Love: Jrzmommy.

  3. Ramdonomo

    Two days ago, she was having none of this ‘adoption’ nonsense. In fact, she was ‘adopting the whole country, in a sense’ or some such crack. Something about an orphanage?

    Another celebrity with a kid-on-a-keychain to show off a parties or whatnot.


  4. biatcho

    Seeing as Jrz just made me wet my pants in a previous post can we not refer to these black chillen’s as jewjew’s b’s.

  5. okiedoke

    Celebrities and their “adopted kid as accessory” are really beginning to get on my nerves. I think they do it more to ease their consciences about the ENORMOUS amount of personal wealth they have.

  6. biatcho

    I meant *now* not *not*. I suck moosecock.

  7. losenord

    That’s really nice of Madonna. I think the child will be in a much better place than before. Two thumbs up!

  8. Shes now an Angelina Jolie wannabe…

  9. Devil Is Chrome

    Am I the only one who finds this disingenuous? Does she realize that she can?t take it back to where she bought it from?

  10. This fad will go out of style and she won’t be able to throw the kid out..


    Do they give tax benefits if you adopt Malawians in bulk?

  12. shell

    I wonder how much money the kid’s father is going to get out of this deal?

  13. BarbadoSlim

    Poor kid, he’s better off living in Malawattever than with this kaballah spewing, fake british from Detroit faghag.

  14. The kid is probably better off not being adopted by Madge!

  15. BigJim

    Is Madonna turning into a blonkey, and this is the first step?

    Biatcho, I’ve got a moose in my back yard you can come by and provide with oral pleasure, should you so desire.

    Just another one of the benefits of living in Canada. Time to feed the sled dogs.

  16. slantingthroughdarkness

    The road to adoption. Does that go through Publicityville?

  17. commissioner

    “Sweatshop” is the bleeding heart liberal term for “chores” in my house. Child labor laws are not applicable to “relatives”. Adopt away!

  18. justme

    There’s a reason why black controlled countries are poor.. It’s because blacks are in charge.. It’s like putting a monkey in charge of Wall Street.. They’re proven idiots…

  19. You can learn how to cook human right on the internet.

  20. combustion8

    Once a slut always a slut.

  21. She couldn’t adopt me, I’m too good for her and probably most of you.

  22. Uhn Tiss Baby

    Madonna is one of few celebrities I vomit on. Her music makes me nauseous.

  23. biatcho

    BigJim, throw in some coonadians with that moose and we’ll call it a gangbang. I’ll just watch thanks.

  24. She can’t even take care of her own two kids …
    There’s a reason why, usually, 50 year old women don’t have kids anymore …
    Adopting a baby doesn’t make you young Madoune …

  25. combustion8

    my bad, what I meant to say was;

    Once a filthy slut always a filthy slut.

  26. Morticia

    #19: Nice racist comment you tool.

  27. spatz

    19 isnt there a kkk meeting you can attend somewhere?

  28. Italian Stallion

    I wonder when Michael Jackson is going to get one?

  29. I wonder if she’ll change his name?

  30. ponk

    so in other words, she will have to pay a tariff to get her purchase through customs?

  31. I’m tired of these celebs thinking they can show us what really good people they are by taking poor kids from their families. I hope the kid grows up to knock up Lourdes, see how Mamadonna digs that. So many good people die everyday… yet the media whore supreme lives!

  32. Binky

    One poor kid saved. ( as long as he doesn’t have to listen to her singing or see her films)
    2 billion to go.

  33. RichPort

    They really are much cheaper if you buy them a half dozen at a time. I mean, I could swear they bought most of my forebears for about $5 US. Total. The kid’s decendents will be rich like me in about 400 years. It’s a start…

  34. Jeremy1Esq

    Its just a ploy for the new British reality series “Different Blokes”

    Lets see which celebrity can adopt the cutuest looking African Monkey and send them to some boarding school the minute the start showing independant and criminal thoughts.

  35. magickal

    Dear Dept. of Child Services in Malawi:

    When you’re done with reading the riveting and compelling book, “Sex”, please reference the video “Truth or Dare”. If you weren’t completely convinced that Madonna is the most fucked up sea hag you ever heard of, this will ensure that you are.

    The REAL “Mag”

    P.S. – Having your own “David” is the new black

  36. HollyJ

    Why did she go for only boys? What is she? Chinese???

  37. Shahlooblah

    Good for the kid he’ll have a better life than before, but i guess who gives a sh*t about the other kids who didn’t have the right qualities to be picked they can just die!

    You really wana help the kids build a center for them or something (your rich enough to do it) so that atleast they all have food to eat and a proper life!

  38. Sayona

    She just needs to go away.

    If she wants to help, well then give money to medical research, money to actually help more than one human. She is adopting to ease her conscience and it is despicable.

  39. TaiTai

    What is she doing in that picture? It looks like she is checking him for ear mites or something. What did she do, line them up and check all their teeth and ears before she picked the one to buy? Somebody ought to tell her that sort of thing has been illegal for a few years now.

  40. jrzmommy

    So, okay…the kid’s got a father who couldn’t raise him after the mother died during childbirth, but the father obviously loves the kid…….so why doesn’t Madonna just give the father some cashola to keep the family together? Or pay for the father and the kid and whoever else to relocate to someplace safe where they won’t starve to death and be slaughtered by warlords but he’ll be with his FATHER?

    Fuck it! Get a big U-Haul and load ‘em up—all of ‘em, whoever wants to go…tell ‘em, we’re gonna make ONE trip–just one–if you want to get aboard the Madge Train, get your shit and let’s go!

  41. jrzmommy

    Biatcho: Madonna looks like me picking through the black ones!

  42. At least, little David has seen HIS real father … unlike Lourdes

  43. magickal

    I agree with everybody. Who the mother fuck does this whore think she is?

    #40 – TaiTai: She’s lining them up to check for thrush and lesions. See, its an AIDS ravaged nation, soooo, she cares….just not enough to raise an AIDS baby.

  44. commissioner


    Actually, back in the heavy trader days, circa 1700, a healthy pregnant black girl went for around $500. Probably because the new owner thought she’d be easy.

  45. commish – They paid more for pregger slaves because it was a two-for-one.

  46. RichPort

    Our revenge is hip hop and oversized clothing… and make making blonkey mall rats pays $80 for jeans with our names on them.

  47. frenchtoaststix

    “To Serve Man” is a cookbook! It’s a cookbook! Madonna is going to rip off Rachel Ray. You watch.

  48. magickal

    LOL #48! Nice Twilight Zone reference!

    And, of course, there’s always “Soylent…Green…is…People!!!”



  49. she’s just getting a new toy…sad

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