UPDATE: Madonna & Guy Ritchie divorcing (For real this time)

Madonna and Guy Ritchie are officially ending their marriage. They’ve prepared a public announcement and plan on having the divorce finalized before Christmas, according to The Sun:

The couple are going public with their split because they “can’t bear to live with the pretense any longer”.
They have had a string of shouting matches about the amount of time each devotes to their careers, and over Madonna’s desire to adopt another child. These arguments smashed through their attempts at reconciliation “like a sledgehammer”.
Pals say Madge, 50, initially wanted to wait until next year to announce their separation — after her Sticky and Sweet global tour is finished. But now she and Brit movie director Guy, 40, want a divorce finalized before Christmas — which would have seen the eighth anniversary of their fairytale wedding in a Scottish castle.

I don’t get why Madonna is so concerned about a divorce affecting ticket sales for her tour. I doubt people are going: “She’s not married anymore? Fuck this; I’m going to see Fergie.” C’mon. Madonna fans will be there no matter what. Otherwise, she’ll haunt their dreams with her devil arms per the Official Fan Club Charter. Never sign anything in blood, kids. On that note, I need to find a witch doctor to get me out of my cell phone contract.

UPDATE: It’s official. Madonna’s rep just issued a statement to the AP.

Photo: WENN