Madonna eats our lowly mortal food and other news

September 30th, 2009 // 52 Comments

- Dustin Diamond reads an excerpt from his tell-all book involving Mario Lopez’s sexual conquests – with women. Nice try, Screech. [PopEater]

- Jessica Biel really did get dumped by Justin Timberlake: A convincing argument. [Lainey Gossip]

- Denise Richards: I’d still hit it. I don’t care if she talks about Charlie Sheen’s fear of breastfeeding the whole time, I’d do it. That needed to be said. [Drunken Stepfather: Site is NSFW]

- Katie Holmes should be using this time for something more useful than taking Suri shopping. Like, oh I dunno, fleeing the goddamn country and adopting a new alias. Kids love that shit. [PopSugar]

- Jon Hamm in Muppet form. [Just Jared]

- Jessica Alba finds acting work in the third Fockers movie. — Why did that sentence feel like an oxymoron? [The Blemish]

- Kate Gosselin on slowing down the divorce: “Fuuuuuuuuuuck that.” Okay, maybe not her exact words, but it’s what she was thinking while stuffing her children in brown sacks with dollar signs on them. [Socialite Life]

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. cashmon

    i hate that crazy bitch

  2. Cgirl

    ugh. yellow teeth

  3. Crazy Pants

    Thats what I had for dinner.

  4. Hezza

    That’s not real pizza. There’s no cheese on it.

  5. judy

    Her hair color looks great, she must have just had it done and she better have tipped that girl at least a grand.

  6. fatguydancing

    she doesn’t to bad when she’s not at the gun show.

  7. dude_on

    Of course that is not real pizza. I’m surprised she allowed pictures to be taken of her sustenance ritual of flesh. Hopefully this feeding doesn’t result in another picture on a milk carton.

  8. KL

    That pizza looks good. Madonna is kinda sexy. I highly doubt she carries cash around with her.

  9. Jennyjenjen

    In pic. 5 you can see where her skin is pulled back near her ears from a facelift. You almost have to feel sorry for her, she suffers from a vanity so severe she’ll mutilate herself and obsessively exercise while taking steroids in vain attempt to stay young. There is so much to be said for aging gracefully.

  10. Pity

    I think it all stems from her want to be liked and to be in a lime light. She is a woman who needs to step down and to take a bow out.

    My aunt acts like madonna in the sense that she doesn’t want to admit she’s getting old. She buys expensive creams and beauty products, works out ect…

    The fact of the matter is I believe it stems from something.

    The being said my personal belief is that when everything you do and did relied on your looks, then that’s what you know. So you’ll do anything to keep it going, but there comes a time where you just have to say enough is enough. In fact age can be beautiful as well. All depends on how you manage it… Try to cheat it and you’ll end up looking like a messed up old ugo… instead of just an old ugo.

  11. gg

    she looks beautiful!

  12. "rape rape"

    Goddamn pizza AND a double martini? Is it grandma’s birthday? Who’s in charge here? Somebody better make sure she doesn’t get too hammered and break her hip on the way to the parking lot.

  13. I’m pretty sure someone doesn’t brush twice a day.

  14. i luh dis shit

    this title is HILARIOUS! and i liked that other britney one with the fire, LOL.

  15. Man she old and ugly now
    hotmail email

  16. that is the most terrible looking slice of pizza that i have ever had the pity of seeing

  17. Gary

    GET THIS…

    She said she has never had New York City pizza by the slice. She said she was not a cheese person, but she was willing to try it. So here is what she ordered on her pizza. Black olives and Parmesan cheese! When Letterman suggested pepperoni, she shook her head and said “No pork”. When he said “What else?”, she said “No, I don’t like anything else”. He asks “Onion?”, she says “No, it gives you bad breath. She said “Anchovies, no, pickles, no.”

    This woman is not like you and me. Very weird.

  18. Gary

    Oh, I should have added that when they sat down to eat and they brought the pie, it had what looked like green leaves on it. SERIOUSLY, big green leaves that look like I picked them off my Marbled Pothos. GROSS.

    She also said “Are we gonna really eat it?”

  19. Not only did her voice turn british, her teeth turned british too!!!

  20. mad-donna

    see, the woman looks sexy even though she s a old hag, and you know what makes her look sexy ? the fact that she s fully clothed and hiding her gross arms, crotch, chest and everything about that mathusalem body of hers ! that s what she should do if she want people to think that she s still sexy and fuckable Wear lots of clothes and get attention from the “excellent music” she ll “compose” and “sing” — hahahahah who am i kidding? !!! anyway, hagdonna, don t you dare to get undress and show your crotch for the next album please, you body is OLD and no one likes OLD bodies !! unless they re covered, with designer clothes ?? lol even so they re gross
    but pleeeeease, wear clothes, it suits you better ! lady gaga can go around showing her hermaphodite croth and ass coz she s young and ugly !!! but you maddona, time s up ! (time is even eviler than paparazzos hahaha)

  21. mad-donna

    see, the woman looks sexy even though she s a old hag, and you know what makes her look sexy ? the fact that she s fully clothed and hiding her gross arms, crotch, chest and everything about that mathusalem body of hers ! that s what she should do if she want people to think that she s still sexy and fuckable Wear lots of clothes and get attention from the “excellent music” she ll “compose” and “sing” — hahahahah who am i kidding? !!! anyway, hagdonna, don t you dare to get undress and show your crotch for the next album please, you body is OLD and no one likes OLD bodies !! unless they re covered, with designer clothes ?? lol even so they re gross
    but pleeeeease, wear clothes, it suits you better ! lady gaga can go around showing her hermaphodite croth and ass coz she s young and ugly !!! but you maddona, time s up ! (time is even eviler than paparazzos hahaha)

  22. mad-donna

    and she s also dating a guy her age !??! that s make her look even sexier !! lmao

  23. mad-donna

    and she s also dating a guy her age !??! that s make her look even sexier !! lmao

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  25. Neil

    She used to be a vegetarian.. then she got too deep in crappy religion to care.

  26. Rancid

    She’s on a see-food diet. You can always see the food in her mouth.

    Rotten teeth – dirty fingernails. I guess she’s taking the Howard Hughes road out of here.

  27. I wasn’t a big fan before…stil not

  28. mamamiasweetpeaches

    Oh yes. Shes 50 years old and has NEVER had a slice of New York pizza. Not even when she was LIVING in New York making crap like A CERTAIN SACRAFICE for $100 ! Who believes that?

    I have lived in New York all my life and have dined in everything from WHITE CASTLES to TAVERN ON THE GREEN. My absolute favorite food in the whole world – what I would ask for as a last meal if I was in prison and getting executed in the morning – is a nice piping hot slice of New york pizza! Food Of The Gods!

  29. LilDi

    She actually eats food? I thought she drained men of their lifeforce or got intraveinous nutrition by the way she looks. Or maybe it was bathing in the blood of virgins?

  30. freebie

    She doesn’t look like Madonna, just bears a slight resemblence. Obviously she had quite a bit of work done. A 50 year old woman does not have facial skin as smooth and plump as hers seems to be. She should go and have her teeth whitened because they don’t go with her new face.

  31. vince from slap chop

    Nice chicklets

  32. moka

    mustache!!!!! WTF

  33. Sapphire

    Madonna looks great!! She is so hot & sexy in that form-fitting black dress and her arms are toned and she is just so beautiful and in great shape! I hope I can look like that when I’m her age, she makes 50s look fantastic! I’m 20 years younger than she is and I can’t pull it off wearing a sexy dress like that nor could I ever hope to have arms that look that good.

    Doesn’t matter if she got work done or not, obviously she looks a lot better than most other 50-somethings, your average everyday 50 year old looks wrinkly and awful, she on the other hand looks sexy & beautiful!

    Her teeth only have tomato sauce all over them, they’re usually white. She’s too hot for words and I love her music!

  34. dontlooknow

    How long can anyone stand to be in the limelight? I would have gone on a bender and into hiding after the first five years. What an animal.

  35. Darth

    Is this a fragment from ‘Jennifer’s body’? Or is this something else?

  36. herbiefrog

    there’s still he the same person inside

    no matter how much you try to show him

    [complicated ?

    [[we leaaaarn to live with it

    we like to sh a r e : ))

  37. anonymous

    Ewww! I can’t get past those yellow teeth…disgusting! Get those things whitened, FFS!

  38. The skull ring on her left hand is a nice touch. Appropriate, some would say.

  39. that is the most terrible looking slice of pizza that i have ever had the pity of seeing

  40. yikes

    Did Dave hit that? I wonder…

  41. Idontwannamadonna

    she is a G**damn goblin, no shit.

  42. The look of her hands and arms are plain frightening. To bad they don’t have those arms/ hands as rentals for Halloween. You would scare the bejesus out of your friends. If her arms look like that, just imagine what her snatch must look like. A dogs leather chew toy thats been worked over for several hours.

  43. Wow, I cannot believe she is still hanging around!

  44. She is steady goin fo it.

  45. On one hand this photo is scary. On the other hand we all look like that while we’re eating pizza on the street.

  46. It looks delicious, thanks for sharing.

  47. It looks delicious, thanks for sharing

  48. is it fake or real yeezy? can somebody please answer me cuz i want 2 buy yeezys baby!

  49. good article,thank you

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