Macaulay Culkin Knows How to Handle a Break-Up

January 20th, 2011 // 138 Comments

Despite Michael Jackson touching him in places that can only be pointed out on a teddy bear, Macaulay Culkin seems to be handling his break-up from Mila Kunis, along with the fact she was blind the entire time, surprisingly well. Here he is leaving The Bagdad Live Sex Club in Barcelona with Spanish porn star Irene Lopez which is probably the healthiest response I’ve ever seen to being dumped on your ass by a girl way out of your league. Then again, let’s not pretend this isn’t how Charlie Sheen responds to each new day. “Ha! Woke up again. TO THE WHORE JET!”

Photos: Splash News

superficial

  1. Funeral Guy

    Great posture on this whore. I guess that’s what happens when you spend most of your time hunched over mens laps giving knob polishes.

  2. Ok..I’m a chic, but even I don’t think a dude should date a girl that has more eyebrow hair than HE does :/

  3. Deacon Jones

    (slaps hands to side of head)
    AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

  4. Mac, you’ve got money, do the GOOD drugs. Smack rehab in 3… 2…

    • Facebook me

      Seriously..looks like he’s been on a bender since the break-up..Next we’ll hear him and Sheen been swaping whores.

  5. Andriiya

    I’m pretty sure that’s a dude.

  6. seth rogen's vagina

    We need to start working on a new Mt. Rushmore – with this move, Caulkin gets on there right next to Charlie Sheen.
    The movie ‘Saved’ was absolute genius – and Caulkin was f’ing brilliant in it.

  7. Lovisa

    she sure doesn’t look spanish

  8. He’s in the picture with a porn star? I thought that was my neighbors horse…

  9. Supe

    Those eyebrows terrify me.

  10. Bucky Barnes

    Fortunately there were no negative long-term consequences resulting from his time with Michael Jackson….
    Macaulay: “That’s not how you doggy-style silly, I have to be in the front. Now be a good girl, strap this on and ride my ass all the way to Madrid. Giddyap l’il doggies!”

  11. Mortimer Duke

    Water has finally sunk to its own level.

  12. From juicy mouthwatering steak to a dumpster dinner with a side of herpes.

  13. Bucky Barnes

    Perhaps worth noting that of all the available foreign destinations Macaulay was somehow drawn to the tip of Europe’s whang.

  14. Elle

    I’d be more worried about the fact that she’s wearing an Ed Hardy tee…only two kinds of people wear those; The Jersey shore’s and the Jon Gosselins…wait…right..only one kind of people wear those…

  15. Macaulay Culkin Sex Club Porn Star Mila Kunis
    Greg
    Commented on this photo:

    HOW?!

  16. Macaulay Culkin Sex Club Porn Star Mila Kunis
    ick-abod
    Commented on this photo:

    she needs to scrape her teeth

  17. Lisa

    I don’t know. I never thought Mac was ugly. He was a really cute kid who grew up to be a pretty cool dude. Granted, if you’ve been in the long-term relationships that he has (Rachel Bilson and then Mila Kunis), you might need some casual sex and who better to have that with, than a porn star?

    • He was a cute kid, but his face never matured and now he looks like an adult is wearing an 8 year old kids face as a mask. He’s creepy looking and that patchy facial hair homeless guy beard isn’t helping.

      • Satan's bitch

        You totally nailed it, McFeely.

      • Mortimer Duke

        McFeely scores again! Its like that Home Alone poster breathing on you, but with Jack Daniels breath.

      • The zit on his face isn’t doing him any favors either. I never thought anyone with light scruffy chin pubes could actually look worse than Spencer Pratt – I was wrong.

      • seth rogen's vagina

        wtf cares what you think about his looks? he’s in Spain, banging a blonde haired blue eyed spanish porn star for rebound poon from his recent breakup with Mila f’ing Kunis! yep, scruffy patchy beard, wal mart brown flannel shirt, and a big old red zit right on his face – and he’s still scoring poon 99.9% of us would have no shot at ever. Him & Jerry O’Connel must have some super poon scoring powers.

      • She may be a porn star, but she won’t be poon that 99.9% of us want to have a shot at until she puts a paper bag over her head.

    • Girl who knows ALL

      It wasn’t Rachel Bilson it was some girl who looked a bit like her called Rachel Miner. See here:
      http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000346/bio

    • Brooke

      I agree, I think Mac is hot! I always have…He’s I think a year or so older than me and I remember when it was Mac vrs. Lij and I was like are you kidding me I’d pic Mac anytime. He must be doing something right he got Mila, kept her all those years. And whoever said he can’t afford Charlie Sheen type drugs. Are you kidding, this kid was one of the richest people at one time, I’m sure he still does okay. I mean he retired at like 12.

  18. nonminti

    I can’t be harsh with him,he was just too many times lost home alone…

  19. snarky_pup

    Horseface.

  20. “Here he is leaving The Bagdad Live Sex Club in Barcelona with Spanish porn star Irene Lopez ”

    There’s so much awesome in that one sentence that I’ve decided to have it engraved on my tombstone. Which I will use as a coffee table, because I’m not dead yet.

  21. mamamiasweetpeaches

    She DOES know that there are places where you can go and for a five bucks a litle Asian girl can fix your brows with hot wax in less that 5 minutes, right?

    Oh and that they make smokers tooth paste now.

    • Andriiya

      There’s also places he could go and have a little asian girl take care of his problems for $5.

    • v-tard

      Toothpaste comment is spot on.

      Spanish girls smoke more than French girls. It’s amazing they don’t get mouth cancer before 30.

  22. mamamiasweetpeaches

    It just boggles my mind that someone would spend eighty bucks on an Ed Hardy t-shirt and NOT be willing to pay to get their brows bone!

  23. WTF! I read spanish porn star Irene Lopez. My bad, I thought it was spanish porn star luscious lopez. Sorry my bad. Nothing to see here, moving to next thread.

  24. Somebody get that mannish boy on the Fruit of the Loom commercials with Charlie and Michael.

  25. Kevin

    I think he’s cute.

  26. melcon1980

    wow he looks like shit.

  27. Macaulay Culkin Sex Club Porn Star Mila Kunis
    I'm on my Period.
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t even know him and Mila were dating until they broke up seven years later.

  28. Clem

    Maria Shriver in a blonde wig.

  29. Macaulay Culkin Sex Club Porn Star Mila Kunis
    poopsmith
    Commented on this photo:

    ugh this bitch is gross

  30. mlkbunny

    He looks like he smells bad. Even her eyebrows are trying to run away.

  31. Talk Hard

    Anyone see her, um, body of work?

  32. Oldnslo

    In my life, I never thought I’d be compelled to say, “Way to go, Macaulay Culkin!”

    Nice job on the rebound sex. She’s a not difficult to look at hose-and-dispose unit. Ms Right Now.

    I especially like his, “Yeah, she’s the rebound p-holster” look.

  33. Wootang

    Major downgrade.

  34. Marnie

    Um, do you have proof that Michael Jackson touched Mac inappropriately? If I remember correctly, Mac testified that he did not. You might want to reward that sentence because it is slander. Fair warning.

    • Andriiya

      What kind of reward should we give it?

    • Noname

      It is libel cos it’s written down. Apart from that and the reward – great post!

    • Oldnslo

      Fair warning? Gee, Marnie, thanks! To be actionable libel, Mac will have to produce someone who will testify that his (or her, of course) opinion of Mac changed due to what he (or she, of course) read here, despite the obvious fact that nothing on this site is intended to be taken as fact. By the way, who will Mac sue? Some internet dude who’s going by the name of Captain America’s sidekick? Fish isn’t responsible for what’s posted here by us assholes, otherwise your post never would have seen the light of day.

      • Oldnslo, the “fair warning” bit was unintentionally funny, but c’mon- you’re admonishing someone who not only doesn’t know the difference between libel and slander, but can’t tell “reward” from “retract”.

  35. burton

    so he goes from someone normal and hot to a trashy pornstar, way to go, what a loser. have fun with the herpes Mac.

  36. John

    You have to go porn star after a break up, who else is going to do those other things you want to and properly before you go back to respectable.

  37. Macaulay Culkin Sex Club Porn Star Mila Kunis
    lalalaaaa
    Commented on this photo:

    he looks smelly

  38. Danklin

    Porn star?? Jesus, they must have all kinds of fluffers on standby

  39. Sitar Joe

    He must have discovered her when he was home alone.

  40. Reggie Rhino

    Always knew this kid was missing a few brain cells after hanging with MJ. Now, there is absolute proof positive that it is true. He went from Mila Kunis to that bag of shit porn queen! Nice move Macaulay, that will definitely put Mila in her place!

  41. Al Lawson

    According to IAFD that chick has made a grand total of ONE porn flick. That doesn’t make her a “star” by any stretch. Guess she’s just a garden variety whore.

  42. hilary

    i am in love with Macaulay Culkin. he is my dreeeeeeeeeeam. i am not joking. i am also not crazy and trashy. i am in love. he has had my heart since home alone!

  43. Btw….I never thought 2 ugly people can make a perfect couple….Guess life’s full of surprises

  44. SJ

    “Porn Star” implies that she’s famous. “Appeared in porn movies” probably would have been more appropriate!

    • TOM13

      Porn stars over in Europe are like any other tv star and go to the same events as to our movie stars back home.

  45. TOM13

    Hell yeah!! That is definantly how you do it, hit up Europe man! Where most girls will put the chicks back home to shame, and no one is “out of your league” I don’t even think they have leagues here :-). Honestly though girls that are 9-10 and higher are a norm, its friggin genetic or something. Its a real man’s playground. Leave the little girls with drama problems home and get on a flight!

  46. TOM13

    Just checked, and yep Irene Lopez is hotter. Upgrade, someone whos hotter and most likely has better skills than the last… so wheres the downside?

  47. nes

    he looks like he needs a shower

  48. They were made for each other. They both suck when they act.

  49. Michael

    So everyone is assuming they are dating because they took a picture together. It looks like he’s posing with a fan to me.

  50. Assuming that zit is still there when they get naked, does that make it a 3-way?

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