Lindsay Lohan’s eHarmony ad

April 14th, 2009 // 120 Comments

Here’s Lindsay Lohan doing an eHarmony ad for the folks over at Funny or Die which pretty much flushes whatever tiny shred of dignity she had down the toilet. Granted, she makes fun of herself, the video is basically a thinly-veiled attack of Samantha Ronson. But, on a brighter note, it also trumpets Lindsay’s inevitable return to the penis. — Whee?

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  1. dave

    who cares she sucks…………

  2. eric

    Wow, a singer and an actress?

    Think she might be stretching it a little bit.

  3. shaun

    Actually, that was quite funny and well done. She has a good sense of humor about herself, which is always likeable.

  4. justifiable

    #52 I dunno, it’s working for Billy Bob, right?

  5. ishi-san

    You can actually see the coke in her nose at one point!

  6. Lourenço farrenzi

    IT is super funny, really, i don’t see why people hate this girl, she’s a great actress and seems really cool, we all make mistakes but she seems a down to earth, lovely and sweet girl. Why people keep trashing her? gotta be jealous, ridiculous.

  7. cman

    The best piece of work she’s done in years…

  8. Massa'

    @41 I hate walruses

  9. The Crow

    Return to the penis?
    Samantha has a penis and $100 says its bigger than Fish dorks.

  10. Scorpion559

    I’m very aroused.

  11. Wow. someone’s been doing meth all night and not sleeping. she looks horrible. put the pipe down, hon, it’s time for bed and a milkshake.

  12. really?

    what provoked her to do this? goddammit, she’s a quality actress if she would just stop all this shit. she just keeps digging herself deeper into the “don’t hire me or respect me because this is all i have going for me” barrel

  13. Jamie's Uterus

    Not a fan of hers, but I did think this was kinda funny.

  14. el ces

    She doesn’t wear glasses or tie her hair back anymore, huh?

    She looked good.

  15. Jenna

    I enjoyed that. Kind of restores a smigen of my respect for her. Maybe next she’ll get a real acting job in a not-horrible movie, and I’ll have a little bit more.

  16. loved`

    loZER! who goes to e-harmany when u got money and wen ur famouse lozERRRRRRRRRRRR!

  17. b

    that was hilarious. i look forward to seeing her in films again. you people, on the other hand, are UGLY. your bitchiness/homophobia/misogyny is seriously fucking depressing. oh, and ps; there’s this thing called mandatory testing when you’re on probation, and its for real even if you’re famous. she’s been clean for over a year. altho she could cut back on the cigarettes…

  18. b

    um, “loved”: its a PARODY, not a real eharmony ad….

  19. Venom

    I would do her six ways from Sunday.
    Damn that is a bad baby.
    Piss of Ronson you hag.

  20. Megan

    She needs to learn to read a fucking teleprompter or cards better. It’s way too obvious. Not that it matters. She’s still a waste of space.

  21. Rhialto

    Where’s my cutie?

  22. titsonsnack

    She looks hot for a 45 year old.
    She needs to sleep, eat better, take care of herself, stay out of the sun. It doesn’t even matter if this is funny or not, I found it mildly funny, fact is she looks HAGGARD. Youthful, fertile, nubile girls in their early twenties aren’t supposed to resemble bitter divorcée beef jerky. Imagine what she’ll look like at 32.

  23. It was hilarious, brilliant, and I’d hit it.

  24. kingofbeer

    I bet she’s greedy in bed……I like that :p

  25. Tom K

    It is amazing how washed up she is! She needs to go back to the her days when she had some meat on her bones and she looked fresh and not used up, whored out, coked up and skanky as hell. At least her hair is red again. So I guess that’s a plus?! Red hair works for this slut though.

  26. sarah

    This is her best work yet!

  27. heather

    If I was famous I’d leverage that into getting into a famous university, Claire Danes style. She should do that. And maybe she could meet Mr. Moneybags for a hubby in Econ 101. Can’t stand the voice though. Sounds like a whore voice.

  28. humpinfrog

    I haven’t seen the video yet, but in the screen shot she looks like a thirty-five year old cougar. Rrrrrrrrrrr…(cough)…rrrr..(cough)..rrrrrrrrrr…(belch) aaaaooo(cough/fart)…..rrrrr. ” I smell Oscar! You. Go. Girl.

  29. boobies

    67 who are you trying to fool? we all know you are lindsay lohan because the only person who actually likes lindsay lohan is herself
    maybe not so much anymore, but you get the gist here

  30. humpinfrog

    Wow! I called it! Love the truckstop waitress voice. Will they put her above the “Best Boy” and “Key Grip” credits in her next movie? I will say she seems to accept her situation and, Lindsay, you can have the quarter in my pants, if you can find it.

  31. jzz

    cocaine is a hell of a drug!!!!

  32. danay

    for a girl who is so naturally beautiful and young to already look so trashed is just sad….although not as sad as her being so confused desperate for..something that she would actually go out with a girl that is confused herself.************************

  33. angry face

    That was so funny! Reminds me why I like her as an actress. Reminds me of Mean Girls. I hope she fixes herself and starts acting again.

  34. fuck

    wow…..completely destroyed whatever remaining shred of dignity she might have had….

  35. tee hee

    crack is whack, but this was funny!

  36. Amy

    OMG lighten up people, thats hysterical!

  37. Binky

    I’d give it a ‘pass’
    Pretty funny.

  38. you guys

    you guys iz crazy! i’d bone the crap out of her. plus, she’s a nympho.

  39. Rough Daddy

    She has a pussy in her mouth! You go girl!

  40. justifiable

    who let the dogs out? and by “dogs” I mean Rich Port’s Ghost

  41. whatever

    OMG Amy calm down! it was only mildly funny

  42. SamRo

    fuck off you crazy bitch!

  43. Randal

    Lindsay, throughtout the years you’ve been inspiration to my adopted Korean daughter. We both love your red hair and how it matches you pubes. I have your picture in my bathroom above the toilet and I love looking at it while taking a piss. You are truly amazing! Love,
    Randal

  44. Randal

    Lindsay, throughtout the years you’ve been inspiration to my adopted Korean daughter. We both love your red hair and how it matches you pubes. I have your picture in my bathroom above the toilet and I love looking at it while taking a piss. You are truly amazing! Love,

    Randal

  45. Joejam2845

    I’m curious why any guy would want to Poke that Pussy Bumper???

  46. davidw

    #82——————– totally agree with you. straight girl making “confused” decisions means that she is fkd up in the head.

  47. ginger

    at least she didn’t marry samantha ronson & adopt five babies from africa

  48. I heard Wil Ferrel isn’t fond of her. I think this would’ve seemed funnier if she’d had a watchable movie in the last 4 years, something in the media besides her manufactured attention seeking.

  49. a losing american: WE REALLY MUST FEEL SORRY, folks!!

  50. Corina

    Oh wow. She is so damn skinny. I just want Angelina to adopt her already.
    And she is clearly reading from a teleprompter. Her eyes kept shifting right back to it.

    Here’s hoping she gets better! There’s only two things that sell magazines: failure and those who overcome it.

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