Lindsay Lohan’s boyfriend is hot

May 9th, 2006 // 147 Comments
llohan-boyfriend-ny.jpg

I’m 90% sure the clown in the hat isn’t Lindsay Lohan’s boyfriend, but when an anonymous source makes wild allegations backed up by absolutely no facts whatsoever who am I to question? Honestly though, I’m not even sure the guy is a guy, or even Lohan’s friend for that matter. He’s dressed like a homeless man and his shoes look like they belong to Forrest Gump. Buy, hey, maybe he is Lindsay Lohan’s boyfriend. She went out with Fez, so an effeminate looking homeless boy shouldn’t be that much more surprising.

UPDATE: Mother of God, that really is Lindsay Lohan’s boyfriend and he’s actually a model. His name is James Burke and he was most recently linked with Kate Moss. Apparently cocaine causes blindness now.

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Comments (147)

  1. sundaybl00dysunday | May 9, 2006 at 12:31 pm

    firs!

    Reply
  2. Lou | May 9, 2006 at 12:31 pm

    zing

    Reply
  3. sundaybl00dysunday | May 9, 2006 at 12:33 pm

    She is giving free sex to the homeless! that is what I call charity! and the free sex also comes whit free herpes!

    Reply
  4. honey | May 9, 2006 at 12:34 pm

    her new boyfriend is michael jackson?

    Reply
  5. Lindsay Lohan | May 9, 2006 at 12:35 pm

    How dare you insult my boyfriend? I think I have the world’s most exquisite taste. I can’t get enough of Emilio Estevez for example.

    Reply
  6. killerkat | May 9, 2006 at 12:36 pm

    OMG!! who picks her clothes!????!!
    why she keeps dressing uglier and uglier?? as if she hasn’t all that money and could’n buy something that doesn’t make her look like somebody taken out of a trash container or a homeless shelter!!!!

    Reply
  7. Feed_Me_Chocolate | May 9, 2006 at 12:36 pm

    He looks like another incarnation of Johnny Depp. And WTF is up with those godawful leggings? Were they having a $1 sale at Forever 21?

    Reply
  8. wolverette | May 9, 2006 at 12:36 pm

    She has HOLES in her LEGGINGS.

    What the fuck.

    Reply
  9. Feed_Me_Chocolate | May 9, 2006 at 12:38 pm

    And look at the saggy places in them where they look like they were yanked down really fast. Which isn’t a far stretch of the imagination as far as Ho-han is concerned.

    Reply
  10. mutterhals | May 9, 2006 at 12:40 pm

    So now she’s dating Winona Ryder? (WTF is that thing?)

    Reply
  11. GAH-dy | May 9, 2006 at 12:40 pm

    mmmm, i want to lick his shoes clean

    Reply
  12. MotherOfPearl | May 9, 2006 at 12:41 pm

    Has 80s fashion returned? I know coke was big in the 80s, so maybe she’s trying to bring back all things 80s?

    Reply
  13. UNWASHEDMASSES | May 9, 2006 at 12:42 pm

    Is she a member of the Celebrity Fuck of the Week Club? Every time I look at the cover of US Weekly she’s sucking some new cock. Her mom needs to stage an intervention before her herpetic and syphilitic puss drops off or develops a life of its own (if it hasn’t already). Fucking her has got to be like fucking a glass of water. On a clear day I bet you can smell her cootch from a mile away.

    Reply
  14. waterranger | May 9, 2006 at 12:42 pm

    Wow that outfit way uglier than the one she is wearing on Go Fug Yourself. Like, ew.

    Reply
  15. sweetcheeks | May 9, 2006 at 12:43 pm

    All she needs are some hypercolor t-shirts and an acid washed denim jacket. And she needs to crimp her hair. GOD the eighties sucked.

    Reply
  16. UNWASHEDMASSES | May 9, 2006 at 12:44 pm

    And as for the new guy, if he isn’t the living definition of “half a fag” I don’t know who is.

    Reply
  17. Agatha | May 9, 2006 at 12:44 pm

    He looks a lot like Taylor Hanson. Mormons gone wild??

    Reply
  18. Gerald Tarrant | May 9, 2006 at 12:44 pm

    Is that other chick Chelsea Clinton? No really, I’m serious.

    Reply
  19. killerkat | May 9, 2006 at 12:45 pm

    and the three of them seem to desperately need to take a bath!!! just look at the yucky cheesy hair ewww and the ugly darker roots in all of them ewww

    Reply
  20. BigJim | May 9, 2006 at 12:49 pm

    This is a true story about her fucking the homeless. I know because LL dropped by my cardboard box the other day and asked if I wanted a charity lay.

    I said, “No thanks,” and went and fucked a sewer pipe instead.

    Reply
  21. lucycharms | May 9, 2006 at 12:49 pm

    He is probably her drug dealer.

    Can someone please tell Lindsay that if you must wear leggings…. you should throw them away once they have runs in them.

    Reply
  22. snarky_girl | May 9, 2006 at 12:55 pm

    Okay, I can get past the ugly clothes, almost. But they are TORN!!!!! Does she not have peons to go get her a new pair???

    Reply
  23. PandoraKnight | May 9, 2006 at 12:57 pm

    From People.com:

    LIP SMACK

    Lindsay Lohan shares a public

    Reply
  24. Land-Man | May 9, 2006 at 12:57 pm

    That isn’t Lindsay’s boyfriend, It’s my Land-Cock. I dressed it up like a retarded guy to remind Lindsay of Fez.

    Reply
  25. hurley | May 9, 2006 at 12:58 pm

    #23

    Reply
  26. polypam | May 9, 2006 at 1:04 pm

    You can always tell when Lindsay Lohan has consulted her stylist and when she is just winging it on her own. White leggings with lace cuffs?!! And they’ve got such “edgy punk rock” runs in them. Did she dumpster dive for those gems? MY EYES! MY EYES!

    Reply
  27. miss_paris | May 9, 2006 at 1:05 pm

    i think he is her drug dealer.

    Reply
  28. heifferzzz | May 9, 2006 at 1:06 pm

    #7 clearly you meant, ‘Pojnd Nhyep’ or some other arrangment of those letters and mistakingly came out with ‘Johnny Depp’ because Johnny is devine and dirty sexless creatures in whitetrash outfits are called pojnd nhyep/dnoy jne php/jepod hnpny…

    Reply
  29. Feed_Me_Chocolate | May 9, 2006 at 1:09 pm

    #29
    But Johnny always looks so scruffy, so unkempt…so FRENCH.

    But I do love Captain Jack Sparrow. See? It fits him–scruffy, dirty, weird.

    Reply
  30. Lala | May 9, 2006 at 1:11 pm

    If she’s taking hand me downs from Kate Moss, you know what’s next – Pete Doherty.

    Excuse me while I head off to Times Square in a robe, so I can hold up a sign saying “The End of the World is Near”

    Reply
  31. Jacq | May 9, 2006 at 1:12 pm

    Lesbian!

    That guy looks like he’d be Kate Moss’s type, but I can’t see his teeth or his track marks…

    Reply
  32. Jacq | May 9, 2006 at 1:12 pm

    The guy who mows my yard and barely speaks English had cleaner tennis shoes.

    Reply
  33. killerkat | May 9, 2006 at 1:13 pm

    ahhh bastards!!!
    some innocent homeless people must want their hat, leggings, shoes and pants back!!!

    thet live in cardboard boxes for God’s sake!!! stealing clothes from the homeless, you’ll go to hell!!!

    Reply
  34. SheasGirl | May 9, 2006 at 1:15 pm

    ew

    Reply
  35. 86 | May 9, 2006 at 1:21 pm

    He looks like her twin sister.

    Reply
  36. Spacedog | May 9, 2006 at 1:21 pm

    Kinda looks to me like they got carded at the R-rated movie and don’t know what to do next.

    Reply
  37. fblau | May 9, 2006 at 1:21 pm

    Model/Musician?

    What better way to say you both suck and Suck.

    Reply
  38. badfishstan | May 9, 2006 at 1:22 pm

    I swear, it’s gotta be Jesse Camp!

    Reply
  39. gogoboots | May 9, 2006 at 1:22 pm

    He’s hot actually, but I can’t see his face. He does look like a girl and like Linds twin…ugh!

    Reply
  40. 86 | May 9, 2006 at 1:23 pm

    Wait no, it’s Jacko.

    Reply
  41. 86 | May 9, 2006 at 1:23 pm

    HA! @37

    Reply
  42. pinky_nip | May 9, 2006 at 1:25 pm

    Is he trying out for the remake of Benny & Joon?

    Reply
  43. Cisi | May 9, 2006 at 1:26 pm

    And someone please tell the hail-a-cab assistant that oversized-shirt-over-leggings is NOT a look to emulate. Ugh. A Lindsay wannabe – HAHA! That’s funny. Oh, and scary.

    Reply
  44. pinky_nip | May 9, 2006 at 1:27 pm

    Man, this chick will fuck anything that isn’t nailed down.

    Reply
  45. PeteMcLochness | May 9, 2006 at 1:28 pm

    fuck, fuck, motherfuck, fuck… where’s Silent Bob.

    Reply
  46. newbondsux | May 9, 2006 at 1:28 pm

    @18 – I’m 90% sure that’s chelsea…

    Which brings to mind a joke…

    What do you get when you cross a crooked politician and a crooked lawyer?

    Reply
  47. playahater101 | May 9, 2006 at 1:30 pm

    #27, I agree. Those lace leggings with the runs in them are sickening. What I’d like to know is when the fashion world decided that great 80′s look is something they want to revisit. Flat shoes and leggings under oversized shirts with a big belt?? If I’d known that was coming back I’d have kept all my stuff from the 80′s including parachute pants, sweater dresses and jelly shoes. I’m sure they all paid a fortune for those clothes when they could have just gone garage sale hopping.

    Reply
  48. gogoboots | May 9, 2006 at 1:32 pm

    Those leggings are gross, they’re white and lacy…the two worst fashion combinations I can think of…!

    Reply
  49. playahater101 | May 9, 2006 at 1:33 pm

    That is SO Chelsea Clinton.

    Reply

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