Lindsay Lohan’s birthday party was a cash grab

July 1st, 2009 // 51 Comments

Lindsay Lohan was apparently paid $70,000 for her swimsuit birthday party at the Wet Republic which guests report was a blatant cash grab for the broke actress. Page Six reports:

At the event, which served as a promotion for her Sevyn Nine self-tanning mist, Lohan changed bathing suits five times before throwing on club gear and dancing to Michael Jackson songs for the rest of the night.
But friends of Lohan say the event was less of a celebration and more of an urgent attempt to pull in some cash. “None of her really close friends were there,” said our insider, who noted that ex-girlfriend Samantha Ronson was also missing from the festivities. “The only person who was even known was Brittny Gastineau.”

Ha ha, their source thought Lindsay has friends. That’s rich. But, seriously, who the hell decided it’d be a good idea to pay Lindsay Lohan $70,000 for an appearance? Even if she promised to wear ten bikinis and OD naked in the pool, there’s no way I would’ve paid a dollar over twenty bucks. And, okay, maybe a can of Red Bull. I’m an old softie.

Photo: Getty

  1. Taz

    i would still pump the shit out of her

  2. One L

    Well duh… Of course she had to have money. She isn’t getting it from Sam anymore. She had to get it somewhere.

  3. mikeock

    So sad. I bet they find her dead skinny ass in a heap, stuck to a pile of her own vomit some day.

  4. KB

    $70,000? More like $700.

    And who in their right mind would even attend a shit-fest like this with Lindsay Lohan as the guest host/skank?

  5. p0nk

    $70,000 will buy enough blow and Red Bull to last her a week.

  6. I thought she was one of those who died last week.

  7. veggi

    p0nk!!

    Well, I bet she’s fun to hang out with though….. probably wakes up under the fitted sheets with her legs through the sleeves of her sweater..

    coke is one helluva drug..

  8. Moto Rola

    I’d count the freckles on her thighs any day.

  9. Do FreeBird

    #8, just a little suggestion:

    The dry marks are probably freckles, the ones seeping a clear fluid are probably some kind of venerial pustuals.

    Happy hunting

  10. justifiable

    Hell, I’d write her a check for $700 right now if she’d burn those fugly-ass shoes.

  11. mikeock

    I wonder if her cooter lips have freckles on them?

  12. titsonsnack

    I still think she looks like Malcolm in the Middle, in drag.

  13. Emily

    Hey, isn’t that miley Cyrus next to her leg?!!?

  14. sam

    The shoes are hideous, they make her toes look really creepy, and they are just wrong for a pool party. The toenail polish sucks. She’s got that sleepy-eyed look that says “I’m sooo wasted.” The swimsuits might have looked good on her a few years ago, but now she is built like a pre-teen boy. If she is going to promote self-tanner she should learn how to apply it evenly.

    And stop with the f-ing peace sign already!

  15. Billy Mights

    Is her taning mist spelled “Sevyn” because she thinks it’s cool, or is it because she can’t spell “Seven?”

  16. anon

    her shoes look like they’re made out of electrical tape

  17. Pewps

    @13 I was thinking that too

  18. Bri

    Definitely Miley

  19. Tom K

    What was she spending her money on?!!!! I know, I know drugs and red bull but can you really blow through about 7 million on drugs and red bull?

  20. Mal Gusto

    HAHAHAHA! Brittny Gastineau counts as a celebrity siting at this event. What the fuck has she ever done (aside from being born to Mark Gastineau) to deserve any attention?

  21. Rancid

    #11:

    There is SOME sort of spotting down there – I promise you that.

  22. Toolboy

    Lindsay Lohan’s birthday party was a cash grab…more like a Gash Crab!! Oh stop it!!
    I’m telling you now, this bitch is one bad financial decision away from playing connect the dots with porn producer sperm.

  23. Hefe

    I was there last week & the signs they had of her in the casino, promoting this, made her look about 50x as hot.

    The MGM’s pool rocks though. Love that place.

  24. Champ

    What a scabby whore. Yuck. Mix in a cheeseburger with your Blow every few days, would ya?

  25. Telly

    @11 – let’s ask one of the hundreds of guys this little Ginger whore has fucked (or any of the bulldyke carpet munchers she’s eaten out)

    This bitch probably has freckles on her eyeballs & toenails she’s so nasty.

    I’d be willing to throw a spite-fuck in her though. Because I’m a charitable guy.

  26. Four words:

    Just
    Do
    Porn
    Already

  27. Bernardo

    Where the money it is coming from to expend $70000 for a party?. She does not work anymore.

  28. Initial_G

    This is the reason why the US economy sucks at the moment. Its not because people aren’t spending money; it’s because CEOs are making one stupid decision after another.

    Seventy-thousand for Lohan to change into bikinis and take papparazi pics? She does that shit at every party for alcohol and blow.

    With the $69,950 savings, Sevyn-Nine could have paid for some real advertising that works. Instead, they are stuck with a PALE as a freaking corpse (apparently her own product doesn’t work for her) crackwhore tossing up vagina symbols with her fingers.

  29. Jenna

    I thought that girl looked like Miley too!

  30. LPB

    Justifiable, I think it was $600 base, and then they said, $700 if she would put on the retardo shoes. Guess what happened next?

  31. A town

    Anyone from Vegas can tell you that these celebrity “parties” are nothing new. Every club in Vegas has a celebrity “celebrating” something every weekend night. The going rate for one of these is 50-70k. The sad part is the clubs make so much that the cost they pay to the celebrity is insignificant.

  32. netstarman

    Did they at least hose out the area where she was at , I would think with her around she stink up one of the cabana huts with her nasty clothes and her unwashed undies. It looks like she would leave a odor that would linger around till someone throws up in there Mojito drink.

  33. AMO

    WOW, where do I begin? Who wears shoes like that to the pool? Her spray tan line must suck b/c her tan is far from natural; which is what you want in a spray tan or any tan for that matter. Her face? Bitch looks wore the f—k out; like she’s been dancing to MJ’s music for a week non stop. Of course ho’s hound Brittny Gastineau was there. She’s just as money hungry as her mother; just prettier.

  34. your Bedazzler (TM)

    #12
    Good God, you’re right-
    Bwhaahaahahahahahahah !

    (But he has those F’in little elf ears…)

  35. your Bedazzler (TM)

    I think that in one episode of “The Munsters”, Herman Munster goes to a ‘hippie’ party- and he wears those exact shoes!

  36. GaGa

    They should have saved their money. I wouldn’t pay her $70, let alone $70000 to sit around and do nothing. I think everyone should just boycott her so she will just go away, and by everyone I mean nightclubs, designers, magazines, television, the movie industry, etc. EVERYONE!

  37. Crappola

    Shit… I’d like $70,000 for MY birthday bash. Happy Birthday to me.

    All I get for my birthday is stupid criticism from a tacky, yet low-brow comedic website called The Superficial. *sigh* The perks….

  38. BritneyLicker

    FIrst off, wouldn’t all of you want to be paid 70K for your own birthday? i mean, the pricks who chase her around with cameras do it to be paid so way is it wrong for her to? On another note, i reeeeally want to fill her vagina with sperm. MAN she turns me on

  39. RaraAvis

    Where does the $70K come from? Are you serious? This is a casino we’re talking about. It comes from you and me, brother.

    Oh, and she throws in a blow job for the PR guy at MGM. That adds value, huh.

  40. captain america

    a party!!
    SHE BECAME A MENTALLY TWO YEAR OLD GIRL, folks!!

  41. BritneyLicker

    hey RaraAvis, she can keep my portion if she lets me bang her

  42. joejoe

    It’s called Sevyn ‘cuz it has Sevin in it, y’know, the insecticide?…probably to keep her crotch crickets in check…and for the love of the Almighty, will you Hollywood douche nozzle receptacles stop flashing the “peace” sign and blowing kisses to the camera?!?!!?!

  43. Rhialto

    Getting good cash and free drinks.This is the kinda parties she likes.

  44. Galtacticus

    I guess candies and a barbiedoll didn’t reach?

  45. same here taz lol!

  46. cocaine

    and I thought my life was depressing.

  47. oooh

    Doesn’t. Look. High. At. All. Ever.

  48. mrmr

    she looks so worn. like old shoes… or a crack whore.

  49. martina

    She should just take to wearing a shower curtain full-time.

    She really is Tara Reid in-training, but without the implants.

  50. I think people are kind of hard on her. She is being a 20 year old. Who here is innocent of not going out and partying every weekend when they were 20? Difference is no one had the cameras following them everywhere they went!

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