Rampant speculation has ensued since the New Year that Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson are no longer pretending to be a fake lesbian couple in a vain effort to rejuvenate Lindsay’s career. TMZ is reporting the two are indeed broken up and living separately:
We know Lindsay moved out of Sam’s house and is staying with Jen, her manager. Lindsay wants back with Sam. Are they back together — who knows? Did they split? Yes.
I don’t believe this malarkey for one second. Until reports of severely charred penises start pouring in like a freakin’ avalanche, I’m chalking this up as another publicity stunt. Lindsay, if you’re reading this, here’s a sure-fire (heh) way to revive your career: WORK! Stash the diva shit, find a project and act your freckles off. Then when it’s all said and done, you can stop this lesbo charade and freely pursue your undying love of cock.
UPDATE: Lindsay Lohan has just agreed to work for free in a new independent film. Her publicist released the following statement: “Lindsay has requested that all the men stop by her trailer. Repeat. All of them.”