Lindsay Lohan no longer fake lesbianating?

January 8th, 2009 // 42 Comments

Rampant speculation has ensued since the New Year that Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson are no longer pretending to be a fake lesbian couple in a vain effort to rejuvenate Lindsay’s career. TMZ is reporting the two are indeed broken up and living separately:

We know Lindsay moved out of Sam’s house and is staying with Jen, her manager. Lindsay wants back with Sam. Are they back together — who knows? Did they split? Yes.

I don’t believe this malarkey for one second. Until reports of severely charred penises start pouring in like a freakin’ avalanche, I’m chalking this up as another publicity stunt. Lindsay, if you’re reading this, here’s a sure-fire (heh) way to revive your career: WORK! Stash the diva shit, find a project and act your freckles off. Then when it’s all said and done, you can stop this lesbo charade and freely pursue your undying love of cock.

UPDATE: Lindsay Lohan has just agreed to work for free in a new independent film. Her publicist released the following statement: “Lindsay has requested that all the men stop by her trailer. Repeat. All of them.”

Photos: Flynet

  1. jj

    talie hoe

  2. Jupiter Girl

    Lindsays boots are super UGLY :(

  3. havoc

    Nice ass.


  4. pappy

    lindsay you have a lot of well wishers out there, and by well wishers i mean they want to throw you down a well

    thats right they want to murder you by throwing you down a well

  5. Savalas

    Welcome back to penis, sweetheart!

  6. baxi

    FINALLY the paps have figured out that we want BUTT shots of our beloved superficialstars. Please Supericial continue get the hot ones coming and GOING!!!

  7. i love lilo

    AH what a great day for all of mankind!

  8. I’m not too sure how many guys would agree to her wearing a strap on to bed… unless she becomes a scientologist.

  9. I’m not too sure how many guys would agree to her wearing a strap on to bed… unless she becomes a scientologist.

  10. I’m not too sure how many guys would agree to her wearing a strap on to bed… unless she becomes a scientologist.

  11. My favorite fluffer/actress is going to have her back on the market again…yeep pee!

  12. Nice… a triple post. I might as well have been douchey and just posted FIRST!!!!

  13. haha, id let her do lines of my dong.

  14. britney's weave

    why is it so hard for her to believe that she’s not getting movie roles because of her shitty acting abilities and unprofessional behavior on set? she really thinks it’s because of her “relationship”? what a douche.

  15. nastyjay

    one things for sure… my cock loves her

  16. mclovin

    @pappy…that was a rotten thing to say, and by rotten I mean funny.

  17. Sport

    No talent skank with huge, milky pasty-ass white freckled tits.
    Ok – I’ll take the tits.

  18. j

    Lindsey will never give up her love of cunt.

  19. ew

    she makes me sick.

  20. lindsey should get a job and behave herself on set
    one day, everyone will get tired of talking about and hearing about her lesbian life
    and she’ll fade away

  21. mimi

    Who cares about these soulless animals. Give us more Amy Winehouse!
    Keep praying for baby!

  22. Randal

    As always Lindsay, you strike me down like a lightning bolt with your tight outfits The length of your hair dangling and swaying above that squeezable behind sends shivers down any mans spine.

    Keep smiling!


  23. joe m

    Lindsay,please get sodomy out of your life.
    You’re too beautiful for perversion.
    Millions of your fans all over the world,love you.

  24. britney's weave

    that was NOT the real randal.

  25. Shiri

    I don’t think there are too many men left that want her, especially after Ronson’s been licking her firecrotch. The lesbos can have LL, IMO.

  26. diddleysquat

    I’d put it in a Hefty and go to Jackhammer Junction with this ho, are u kidding? What a hot slut she is. Bad girl…. *smack!* Bad girl… *smack!*

  27. booboo

    I have always thought she looked like she smells real bad. She seems like a person with poor personal hygiene.

  28. mrs.t

    #24-My thoughts exactly when I read that. We demand the real Randal, or no Randal at all!

    OK, we’ll settle for the ‘no Randal at all’ option.

  29. ramona putz

    Note to Lindsay:
    Forget about women. Forget about men.
    For now, your priorities should be the following:
    1) Get some serious therapy concerning your narcissism and neediness.
    You really need to address this before you can get your life in order.
    2) Focus on your career, work your ass off to salvage it and behave yourself like the adult and professional that you are. You can do it.
    You have a lot of talent. Get your shit together, get up and get on with it.
    No one can save you, in this life you have to be your own saviour.
    And do not, do not let your Dad back into your life. You are vulnerable right now and it is the perfect time for that weasel-shit -of -a man to slither his way back in.
    I want to you to be successful and happy. I don’t want to see you on a future episode of celebrity rehab. Sincerely, I wish you strength, courage and the belief in yourself that you can turn your life around.

  30. herbiefrog

    note to self…

    seriously lindsay…
    …looking good [1]
    …looking hot [2]

    making some sense ?

    looking for work [3]

    still ‘avin’ fun ?

    not long now ?

    [4] : )


  31. STINK


  32. missywissy

    How would a lesbian affair with a really manly girl improve her image??? Does she have a big lesbian base I’m not aware of?

    I think Lindsay Lohan is a good actress. She seems like she lacks a lot of self control, and that is a huge turn off for most people. I also don’t think she is that classy. She looks like Orphan Annie with a glam makeover.

  33. parisblingbling

    Is she… not wearing pants?

  34. From what I know Lindsay has been very sad perhaps they will get back together again.

  35. zuzuspetals

    Borderline. Personality. Disorder.

  36. tell me: WHO IS THE DUMB ASS NOW, folks?

  37. Narcissist

    I’m wondering if that’s padded. Makes a nice picture, though.

  38. TJ

    She’s starting to get that “hard” look now, like Pam Anderson. Sad, she was talented once.

  39. Cheryse

    Fake lesbianating or not, when Lyndsay’s done with Sam, she can feel free to come down to Canada for sommore fake lesbianating with me. :)

  40. Oh come ON. That’s a nice ass? I can think of 3 of my fuk friends who got way better booty than that.

    #23 – ur gay.

  41. That’s unfortunate, Lohan as a lesbian is mad nice.

  42. Why is it so hard for her acting ability that he and his shitty unprofessional behavior on the set due to not getting movie roles? He actually thinks that her “relationship” is due? What a douche.

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