If Lindsay Lohan had a penis, she’d be waving it at the legal system right now. Or mouth-polishing it for coke. (Never rule out survival instinct.) TMZ reports:
It might seem like bad timing — that Lindsay Lohan was ordered last week to submit to random drug testing, just days before she had her wisdom teeth pulled … but we’ve learned Lindsay got a pass from probation.
Lindsay’s lawyer, Shawn Chapman Holley, tells TMZ, “We advised the Probation Department of the dental appointment, which was made well in advance of last week’s court hearing.” Chapman says she assured the probation officer she would provide “documentation about any medications that Lindsay would be taking, which would be administered or prescribed as part of the procedure.”
So basically Lindsay just scored a free pass to pop Vicodin like goddamn M&Ms. Wow. I never thought of her as a criminal genius, and frankly I’m not going to because the Joker’s schemes never ended in accidental overdose. — Oh, wait.