Lindsay Lohan heading back to back in rehab

May 29th, 2007 // 157 Comments

Lindsay Lohan is reportedly heading back to rehab after she crashed her car over the weekend and was photographed two nights later (above) completely trashed in the passenger seat of a car being driven by her friend Samantha Ronson. The NY Daily News reports:

“She finally realizes it’s the right thing to do,” In Touch quoted a friend of the actress as saying. “She is going willingly.” The pair had just left a Memorial Day pool party at Teddy’s at the Roosevelt Hotel in Hollywood when a paparazzo caught up to them at a gas station around 4a.m. yesterday … Ronson tried in vain to rouse her sleeping pal, who wore a gray hoodie but no seatbelt, when she realized a photographer was snapping away … Ironically, the photos show a medallion dangling in front of the slumbering star from the rear-view mirror. It reads “30 Days” – a reference to the number of days of sobriety. One particularly shocking photo shows Lohan out of the car and on her knees, being watched over by two unidentified men as she seems to vomit on the sidewalk. Another shot shows what appears to be an inch-long fresh cut on the back of her left hand. It was unclear how or when she got the injury.

In Touch claims Lindsay checked into the Promises rehab facility yesterday afternoon, which sounds sketchy at best. I’m not saying their reporting isn’t reliable, but they once claimed that I totally made out with Jessica Alba. Which actually turns out to be true, but, wait, where was I going with this again?

UPDATE: It’s been confirmed, Lindsay Lohan was escorted by her lawyer and checked into the Promises rehab facility yesterday.

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  1. hey buttplug

    #35 – Ollie: if it helps, we find entertainment in everybody’s suffering, not just Lindsay’s. For example, when your mom farted in your face while the two of you were 69ing, it was incredibly funny, even though you started to cry almost immediately. The spurt of diarrhea that followed was slightly less funny, but still, you didn’t stop and we can respect that. Especially since it was a diarrhea spurt that was almost as long as the one you just posted.

  2. dani

    so… it LOOKS like those round poker-chip things hanging from the rear view mirror say “30 days”… PLEASE tell me that they are some kind of sobriety chip from AA. that would be just too perfect.

  3. victoria

    I agree with Nicole (#29). I know this site is TheSuperficial and all, and I do enjoy finding hilarious pictures like these of Linday Lohan, but the arrogant comments about you being a super genius sexy stud sleeping with hundreds of hot chicks and masturbating and all – is that really necessary? Not to mention totally IRRELEVANT to the posts. You can make superficial comments about celebrities all you want and those are probably funnier. But all your other comments about yourself will just show your insecurities.

  4. B.A. Baracus

    “I am just mostly pissed off that human suffering can be entertaining to some.”

    Hey 35/38, are you SERIOUS? Where does someone who not only takes the time to read the Fish but also takes the time post on it get off? The ENTIRE focus of this site is the entertainment value of idiotic stars’ suffering.

    As for you, 36, how can she possibly have disgraced the very family who made her this way. I feel sorry for none of them and continue to laugh at these utterly pathetic shenanigans because…well…they’re funny.

  5. Eric

    #38 “But she is 21, you moron!!! You don’t become a functioning member of society at that age.” Ummmmm! Actually you do. 18 is generally considered the age of adulthood. Being a 21 year old coked up, drunk nympho is not an excuse, it’s not caused because of hard work, or paparazzi or some disorder. It’s caused by making profoundly stupid choices. You can pity her, good for you. But most people won’t buy it until she actually stops being stupid and perhaps starts “Being adequite!”

  6. polypam

    Considering what a great job this Promises place did for Britney, I expect great things from Blowhan.

  7. raquel

    gotta say i agree with nicole also. and her pic @33 looks like appropriate punishment, but i hear it’s every guy’s secret fantasy, so maybe he’d love it. i know wedgeone does.

  8. hollaback

    #35. Hmmm what would I do with millions of dollars and a cake job? I am betting I wouldn’t self destruct. She has too much on her plate?!? Are you kidding me? She is an actress. I am a nurse. People die if I screw up. It can be a little stressful too. Not that I have the only stressful job out there but lets keep things in perspective.

  9. @38 & 35 There is a big difference between the average person and some one like Lindsay, Britney, and the rest if this group of 20 something celbs that have more money than they know what to do with. They have people to manage their lives and just because daddy is a drunk and mom is a whore. there is no excuse for this crap. I could not get into a night club at 20 and get hammered night after night, but everyone turn a blind eye to people like Lindsay because the want the “in” crowd at their establishment. So where are the people that are paid lots of money to manage Lindsay’s life? They are all afraid to tell her NO.

    You would think by giving yourself the screen name of Oliver Platt, you would be a little smarter than you are. The reason all of us make the comments that we do at this site is because these people live a privileged life. They get to go to the head of the line. They get to go back stage at concerts and when a stupid little fuck like Lindsay does the things that she does day after day, she deserves the criticism she gets from this and many other sites.

    If you want to feel sorry for the little tramp, then why don’t you go out to her rehab center and take her some flower, maybe she will give you a blow job for a line of blow.

  10. polypam


    Yeah, she does remind me of that zombie girl from “Shawn of the Dead”, the one the guys found in the backyard and thought was just a drunk! Wouldn’t it be great if someone started hurling records at her head just to finish her off once and for all?

  11. raggedyandrea

    @10 i hate quitterstoo. nice boobs. don’t quit putting those on your site.

  12. Locode

    Amazingly enough the driver is actually a chick. Samantha Ronson. Google it. That’s one of the manliest looking “women” I’ve ever seen.

  13. ThatIsGay

    Wow. Im gonna miss Lindsay. I (used to) like her.

  14. captain obvious

    Guess she needed one last hurrah before getting dry. Yeh, she is one sexy bitch, isn’t she? She sure looks hot with her retarded mouth hanging open…and then the heaving on the pavement…oh baby!! I bet Victor is getting all hot and bothered. There goes his fantasy. Then again, he was probably checking out her ass in the heaving picture.

  15. Blohan'sDeviatedSeptum

    #38, # 35 et all. Being 21 is no excuse for being a reckless, self involved vehicular menace. There’s people alot younger than 21 in Iraq right now sacrificing thier time and lives in a way this narcicistic, clueless fucktard will never EVER comprehend. DUI laws exist for a reason and if you had any experience with he damage drunk asshole drivers like Lohan can do you probably would have shut the fuck up by now. Stop making excuses or telling me how troubled this drugged out skank is. 21 is plenty old enough to know what is right and wrong. If not then fuck you, the powers that be will take you out of society until you do. I’m just glad the only person she hurt was herself.

  16. jenny

    Fact is, life is hard for everyone.
    The difference with celebrities is that they act like their life and their problems are so much worse.
    Most of their problems are brought on themselves.

    She has people to drive her. She has frickin bodyguards and minders at her beck and call. There is NO EXCUSE for her to to be driving drunk or drugged.
    That’s why it’s funny to laugh at celebrities.
    We are just as much if not MORE stressed than them. Work harder. Make less money. Can’t get a relaxing massage everyday and our nails done for us and our hair done for us, or jet off to a private luxurious retreat whenever life gets too much for us.
    THAT is why they deserve no (or little) sympathy.

  17. And by the way, THIS is a girl with too much on her plate…

  18. jenny

    Oh and I forgot.
    She can afford as much therapy or anti-whatevers as she wants.

    No excuse. Get over it already. Try geting some education if you have nothing better to do than drink all day every day.

  19. Miss Skyline

    Damn, Samantha could have at least buckled Lindsay’s seat belt.

    Linds’s drinking and shit is getting ridiculous. She’s gonna end up dead on someone’s floor if she doesn’t chill the fuck out.

  20. Jimbo ?

    @56 Hey troll, don’t you have a fucking life?

  21. polypam

    All of you bleeding hearts who feel badly for this spoiled rotten piece of shit are morons. And as for her being “employed”, check out her page on IMDB. After that stripper film, she has nothing new in production BECAUSE NO ONE WILL HIRE HER! She is a liability who would rather be out drinking & whoring & getting coked up. She courts the paparazzi and then “whines” about them always there. You can’t have it both ways, Linds.

    Maxim likely got a BIG paycheck from her management to put her at #1 because I don’t know any dude who’d chose her over anyone else on that list.

    And those of you who don’t “get” the humor of Mr. Superfish, why do you bother even reading this then? Go blow Perez Hilton instead who’s lame attempt at sarcasm is a lot more simplistic and more up your alley.

  22. Superevil

    Is this Rehab or “Rehab”. What she should do is just check herself into the nearest cemetery cause that’s where she’s headed anyway.

  23. justlikehoney1

    In the large photo under the article’s heading and then again in the 3rd photo at the end of the article, it looks like SaMANtha Ronson is trying to size up Lindsay’s face right before she punches the shit outta her? lmao

  24. ssdd

    #29…??? is that you Rosie?? fat assed think youre better than anyone no sense of humor beast………….

    as far as lohan…………….. yeah~ go picked a winner……..*snaps*..

  25. liz

    It must be a new psychological condition: the desire to find celebrity-trashing websites and write pseudo-clinical diatribes denouncing celebrity-trashing. Who would possibly have time to do that? This site is called THE SUPERFICIAL. There are other places online (god forbid) to find people mewling about the hard life poor Lindsay has. This isn’t the one. Maybe you were looking for There is a really interesting discussion going on over there right now about how britney spears is an inspiration to slutty no-talent child-abandoning sixteen year old girls. You should check it out.

  26. slash

    I have to confess I still have a tiny bit of pity in my cold, cold heart for Lohan, because she so very clearly has idiots for parents, people who are more interested in cashing in than actually raising their kid. However, it is a little difficult to feel too bad for someone who’s already made more money than I’ll likely ever see in my lifetime. Money doesn’t solve every problem, but it takes care of quite a lot of them. Plus, she just got named the hottest woman on earth. So you’ll excuse me if I don’t lose too much sleep over poor Lindsay’s travails, which are now largely self-inflicted. It’s not like she’s doing life in prison for a crime she didn’t commit or locked up in a sweatshop in Shanghai making sneakers for 50 cents a day or blowing sailors in the Philippines to earn back her freedom. She’s a celebrity, so on the sympathy matrix, she comes below orphans and war refugees and those poor bastards down in New Orleans who are still living in FEMA trailers.

  27. Denise

    #56 Jimbo – ummm, hmmm, why don’t you pull up a stool and stay for awhile?

  28. Oliver Platt

    54: ‘There’s people alot younger than 21 in Iraq right now sacrificing thier time and lives in a way this narcicistic, clueless fucktard will never EVER comprehend.’

    I do not consider *wasting* one’s life and time while searching for inexistent weapons of mass destruction, or invading/ bombing a legitimate country and people to be in ANY way superior to snorting cocaine/ drunk driving. But I guess YOU with your decisive republican tendencies will never EVER comprehend that, so the dialogue with you is impossible.

  29. BlohansRoadPuke

    Looks like someone slipped her roofies then thought better of it…

  30. captain obvious

    #59& 48; Amen! But Nicole/#29, I totally disagree! I love the superficial site and find most of the comments and remarks very amusing and witty. Thats why I think most people come on this site; for the comments and the pics. There’s a gazillion other celeb websites out there that just offer the usual celeb pics and critiques…why not go to those instead. As for me, I’ll take my Fish!

  31. elle

    #42 i’m don’t mean to be bitching at you but i think it’s fairly obvious that those comments from superfish about masculinity and who he’s scored etc are highly ironic and obv. show he has a sense of humour about himself as the claims could not be imagined to be true by anyone. it’s not about his insecurities cos if it was then the claims would be trying to sound subtle and sewn into the comment alot less blatantly.
    not getting at you i just don’t agree personally.

    on the photo- doesn’t lindsey look like a string puppet and her friend has the strings?

  32. Josh_Lavarn

    It is sad how these celebrities are living a life people only dream about, being famous, partying, having nice houses, nice clothes, having tons of money, and they are still all miserable druggies that probably would have been happier living in a trailer park like me.

  33. Pocket Rocket

    #56 – if only somebody had thought to put that thing in Lindsay’s open mouth!

  34. Allyson

    Wow, these pics are creepy…she looks totally dead.

  35. Miserable Bastard

    “Ronson tried in vain to rouse her sleeping pal”…

    No seatbelt… Her friend should have gotten on the freeway, sped up to 75 mph, then locked up the brakes and slammed Lohan’s head into the dashboard. Maybe that “30 Days Sober” medallion would have left a reverse imprint in her forehead that she’d be forced to look at every time she saw herself in a mirror.

  36. Emily

    It’s sad to think this is the same person who was that cute little red head girl in the Parent Trap!

  37. RichPort

    It’s Dina’s fault. Back when Lindsay was a little girl, the only way Dina could get dates was to let the guys urinate in Lindsay’s mouth. She’s not out cold in these pics, she’s actually having one of her recurrent dreams.

  38. lawboyut

    People need to stop making excuses for Lohan, Paris and Britney. They may be young, but the fact is, they need to learn to take responsibility for what they do. Just like everyone else does. Just because they have some fame and $$$ does not give them a free pass on their destructive and potentially dangerous behavior. Fact is, they would be just a messed up without the fame and $$$, it is just that those factors tend to aggravate personality and behavior defects faster because they get more privelege than the rest of us. Not because they deserve it, either. There are plenty of other 20-somethings in Hollywood that are not the big trainwrecks those 3 are. They just are in denial and have to learn the hard way. Too bad Paris and Lohan can’t share a cell in the pokey together.

  39. lambman

    #10 – You had “quitters” who’s quitting anything? She’s already been through rehab and that didn’t stop her, hell she’s upped the ante since she went to rehab the last time.

  40. herbiefrog

    hey babe… : )

    soryy life didnt turn out perfect…

    we never promised that…

    just the “free pass”

    maybe its time to regroup

    and… regroup ?

    lol babe

    you shouldnt be jealous of paris…

    she needs our support

    for what is to come


    chill babe
    pay your driver
    and use him

    …perhaps ? :))

  41. lawboyut

    Paris and Lohan in jail together. Bet they both look great in irange jumpers. We would have to rename prison the “Lickey”.

  42. mia

    This is not Lindsay Lohan, it’s Krazihotkelli!
    Good old Kelli is so jealous of those coked celebrities. She spend her days blasting them for being bad christian but in the end, she’s bored of her life. In those picture, she’s trying to lose her virginity.

  43. Lily

    There are a million celebrity blogs out there, and I would think the reason most people read this one is because of the writing. If you have no sense of humor, this probably isn’t the site for you.

    I have nothing to say about Lilo.

  44. sam

    she’s remembering back to how she got her first role.

  45. Dick Cheney

    “Ronson tried in vain to finger her sleeping pal”…

  46. steverino

    These pictures are good, but it would have been better if this had happened when she was with Wilmer Valderrama. Then she would have been passed out with her naked butt up in the air, as if she’s winking goodbye to all of us. Although, now that I think about it, it might have looked like puss was coming out of that “eye” if what he said to Howard Stern was true. Even better!

  47. Sheva

    Back in rehab to hide out/plead leniency at direction of pr whore, nothing more.

    She’ll be out chasing eight balls and cocks in no time.

  48. loopy

    I feel bad for the people who feel bad for her.

  49. sweetnsnooty

    Yaaaaawn…the broad needs some jailtime. Maybe then she’ll wake up. Maybe.

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