Lindsay Lohan has a present for you

June 5th, 2009 // 175 Comments

Lindsay Lohan has been wearing tiny skirts and drinking her way across London which, of course, is the exact recipe for Firecrotch Theater. So here’s how this is going to go down: First, you’re going to notice the surprising lack of flames and charcoal briquettes. Then, you’re going to notice something that’s exactly what you think it is and attempt to lobotomize yourself with whatever’s handy. In my case, a stray kitten. (Sorry, Whiskers.) Enjoy!

NOTE: Pics link to NSFW versions that will probably kill lesser men.

superficial

  1. Mrs. Butterworth

    FRENCH TOAST AND BISCUITS!!!!

  2. Yeah

    Fuck the paps. Invading a person’s space to the degree where you can take an upskirt as she gets out of a car is going too far and should be punishable by law. And yes, Lindsay Lohan is a person.

  3. E-fxx

    Why don’t I see an uncensored version like others? I just see big pink stars over people’s questionable spots on this website.

  4. Must be really desperate to be pulling a Britney.

  5. Superbiggerevil

    I predict we’ll all be reading her obituary really soon…probably by Christmas of this year. She’s a runaway train about to run out of track.

  6. @48, she can’t wear that… unless… there is no hymen OMGZ!

  7. joy

    if i didn’t know who she was, someone could tell me she was in her 40s and i’d believe it. seriously, i don’t even care about her vag, she always looks haggard and tired and old. ugh and those gross junkie hands!

    ps since when do they make flesh colored tampons??? definitely not a tampon string

  8. I’d gladly munch on that for a few hours. Man.. is everybody in this forum female or just gay or something?

  9. friendlyfires

    It’s not her crotch that frightens me, it’s aura of tobacco, booze and death that permeates her person – frankly, it stinks – it reeks so horribly, I’m 6000 miles away, and I’m still retching, but’s probably because I have a good memory, oh used to have memory, thought of death stink start aneurysm, me sleep now, shit, bye,bye

  10. sex

    @58
    No we are not gay.
    We are something… people with a right mind..
    I have three alphabets for you…. S T fucking D

  11. Randal

    Lindsay continues to thrill us by pushing her hairy sexual envelope into any scene that is lucky enough to have it. Her talented roast beef curtains are the envy of all and will be the talk of the town for years to come.

    Here’s to you, Lindsay Lohan, and your wrinkled, purpled cunt. Long may it wave!

    Randal

  12. David55

    OH! NICE!
    I know a more interesting site than this*******Cougar Circle . c o m*****It is where single women and men come together for the mutual online dating experience.and it is for free. I lilke the site!

  13. David55

    OH! NICE!
    I know a more interesting site than this*******Cougar Circle . c o m*****It is where single women and men come together for the mutual online dating experience.and it is for free. I lilke the site!

  14. HankTheDwarf

    Her vaginal is melting.

    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING
    HER VAGINAL IS MELTING

  15. WTF

    AND HER HEAD IS BALDING

  16. Darth

    Hallelo!

  17. What warts? you wackjobs never seen Lilo’s little L’inches before, her very distinctive pussy print and its more of the side Vag anyway. Frankly that was a disappointment I thought that flamingo was going to finally spread its wing for a flight.

  18. Jibbly Biggins

    As for the woefully thin hair in pics 3 & 4, hair loss can be a sign of malnutrition, anorexia nervosa and sometimes hardcore drug use.

    She also looks like a shriveling skeleton. Having no body fat can make face wrinkles worse – or maybe she just has bad genes.

    Either way…she needs help.

  19. suckfuck

    Ladies this is an example of fisting. Keep that vag in a nice condition by not practicing fisting.

  20. mikeock

    Sorry haters – a cunt is a cunt. Given the opportunity, any straight guy would happily open those meat curtains. Man, how many gay guys visit this site?

  21. mikeock

    Why do all these celebrity bitches carry their cell phone/Blackberry/whatever? They have these gigantic purses for what? Spare shoes?

  22. Insatiable Peter

    Badly-wrapped kebab. Better make it a gyro.

  23. Perversion for Sale

    sick rotten world we live in and we are not better than the muslims we murder in our disrespect for women. how this is legal is beyond me, but then again, I am a white man with morals and in my society this would be considered stalking and the camermen would be arrested. TMZ is utter filth and harassment of the lowest order.
    We need to go and move all our whtie christian types into several states and deny access to the lower order who are neither white nor christain. there degraded genetic are polluting ours.

  24. Beef

    Too much meat for the bun.

  25. Bo

    Are you guys fucking stupid? You act like you’ve never seen a real vagina before. That’s what they look like…fuck you’re retarded.

  26. Dread not

    A present for me? Lindsay, you shouldn’t have. NO, REALLY, YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE! Besides, I don’t know what I’d do with that thing. My bathroom plunger is busted, so I guess your legs could be the handles and I could use it to unclog my toilet?

    *looks over his shoulder*

    The misses is gone…

    Calling Lindsay Lohan a fire crotch is not something that should be done. Not because it isn’t a red hot, vibrating box of perpetual over stimulation, that serves as a tongue gymnasium. But because the term was hung on it by a loser who hung-hanged (sorry David Carradine, this isn’t a shot at you) around with Paris Hilton. Why repeat something a loser like that would say. What has the world come to that we’re quoting semi-tards. What kind of idiot would quote a semi-tard? I guess, “stupid is as stupid does.”

  27. bert

    I’d still hammer that poon, and I mean HAMMER!!

  28. I dont think the paps went out of their way to get the money shot! if Lilo wasnt in a war against butt huggers and did not exit the vehicle like a cowboy, this would be just another boring night.

  29. capitanne

    She is going bald. Sad.

  30. marcus

    It looks sad.

  31. David55

    OH, WONDERFUL!
    There are many beautiful mature women and men chatting on that community****Cougar Circle***** which designed to help ethnically diverse singles meet new friends and make dates. u will have a more lovely baby not long after……

  32. David55

    OH, WONDERFUL!
    There are many beautiful mature women and men chatting on that community****Cougar Circle***** which designed to help ethnically diverse singles meet new friends and make dates. u will have a more lovely baby not long after……

  33. Jim

    It looks chewy.

  34. conniecorleone

    The vag itself isn’t photoshopped, but somebody (Fish?) tried to digitally remove a red circle someone had placed around it for emphasis. I feel bad for her. Everyone that comments that the paps are out of line with these upskirt shots are total hypocrites (myself included!!), b/c visiting the websites that post them creates the demand for them.

  35. Hey…as long as shes not screwing africans, its all good.

    That , my whiney, white guilt ridden, socialist, anti-American “friends”, would contribute to the end of civilized society as we know it. A road that Nicole Simpson started paving and KK picked up on…gross.

  36. Hey…as long as shes not screwing africans, its all good.

    That , my whiney, white guilt ridden, socialist, anti-American “friends”, would contribute to the end of civilized society as we know it. A road that Nicole Simpson started paving and KK picked up on…gross.

  37. Incarcerated.

    @75

    I am glad my pussy DOESN’T look like that. Mine looks way more tender. Trust me. Not ALL pussies look like that. Maybe yours look like that, I don’t know. Not mine.

  38. Matthew

    Hohan returns showing of her hoo-ha

  39. Brent

    Lohan vagina, it’s the other white meat!

  40. Brent

    Lohan vagina, it’s the other white meat!

  41. Mikko, Finland

    Who is Lindsey Lohan?

  42. not impressed

    shot gun bang, wtf is up with that thang…

  43. VandaL

    I fancy a bacon butty now for some reason.

  44. YoYo Ma

    Does anyone else see the wart?

    I’m not kidding.

  45. Pass the salt

    Pass the salt

  46. suckkkit

    Duuuude is that a tampon string??? Grosssss

  47. Israel Rodriguez Zapatero

    i love Lindsay, te amo lindsay podria estar abajo todo el dia !!!

  48. netstarman

    I think i do see a vaginal wart. If not someone grab a stick and poke it to see if it moves or shoots venom out. Wheres the Ghostbusters when you need them . I certainly know thats not the Stay-puff marshmallow man down there.

  49. stubble lips

  50. Jethro

    Hey, I’m hungry, fry that thing up!

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