Lindsay Lohan gets fired

August 1st, 2006 // 69 Comments
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Lindsay Lohan has reportedly been dropped from her UK record label Island Records after failing to travel to London for a planned promotional campaign. The album was recorded last year and now the label has shelved it and decided not to work with her again.

“A single was a huge flop over here because Lindsay couldn’t be bothered to promote it. In the end they didn’t even bother releasing the album in Britain. She didn’t bother to come over to the UK to do interviews or make TV appearances to help sell the album. Island have now decided not to do another one with her.”

Even if she had shown up the single still would’ve flopped. They could’ve spent $3 billion and hired some dancing elephants but that still wouldn’t have saved it. Bad music is bad music, and Lindsay Lohan’s bad music is about as bad as bad music can get. But bad Lindsay is bad and bad bad bad. And bad. Maybe bad. Bad.


  1. outtatheblue

    What’s Mamma Lohan going to say about this one?

  2. Uhn Tiss Baby

    Muahaha, what a fekktard!

  3. Fated

    dancing elephants! now there’s entertainment. can always mute the sound :P

  4. OhAySis

    Ha ha! First?

  5. OhAySis

    No..dang it…anyway, at least I’m not Lindsay, or anyone related to her. I’m still better than them!

  6. Oh Darling

    Haha… I knew something like this was going to happen.

  7. always answer b

    What a shame that such a talented artist has fallen by the wayside.

  8. justme

    Her Mother should be locked up.

  9. Binky

    My sources tell me that although she has blown the Island Records (deal) she still has an offer from ‘Shit-Up-The-Creek’ Records.

  10. EdMoney

    Well at least she doesnt have herpes like brit’s sis, only a fire crotch

  11. kandyk0119

    She’s a skank, prob gave some of the label execs STD’s

  12. LL

    Thank you, Lindsay. I knew we could depend on you. Just please, for the love of cheese, just don’t say anything about Jews or the Holocaust or Lebanon. Stay stupid so I’ll have something to mock every day instead of reading the point/counterpoint of people tryin’ to bum me out, talkin’ about what’s happenin’ in the real world and shit. Ignorance is bliss, I say.

    It is hilarious how they imply that if Lindsay had shown up on the telly over there and told the Brits to buy her record, they would have dutifully complied. It failed not because it blows (to imply that would make Island look pretty bad), but because she failed to shill for it. Yeah, that’s it. I’ve heard her sing exactly once, in that Mean Girls movie. OK, but not good enough for a record contract. Why does every showbiz skank think she’s gotta sing? Why can’t Lindsay’s contribution to the world of art be simulated blowjobs? That looks great on a resume. In fact, just add that one to your list of skills and the offers will come rolling in.

  13. CMonster0125

    First the music career starts to fail, and then the movie career goes into the crapper. If there is a God, this shall come to pass and we shall hear the last of the Firecrotch.

  14. It’s like she doesn’t even care anymore. Lord knows I don’t care anymore.

    http://glossedover.com

  15. She’d have probably been 86′d from her latest shitfest of a film had she not shot so much footage. Instead she got the reprimand letter. This is just pathetic. All she had to do was fly over to London and promote her album which would make her more money. That, apparently at this stage in the downturn of her career, is too much to ask. Her mother should spend less time making excuses and more time making appointments with drug counselors. After this week, Linds has been added to my death pool.

  16. CoJo

    More importantly, what was she wearing when she recieved word?

  17. Her music flopped here with her promoting it. First the threatening letter, now this. Soon she’ll be collecting unemployment.

  18. Lindsay, Lindsay, Lindsay… what is a grown up to do? Why not work for a living?

    Fire crotch… what a good idea for a sex toy name-
    http://www.holisticwisdom.com/sex-toys.htm

  19. biatcho

    If they can promise one of those rarely-seen-except-for-on-the-Nature-Channel 5 legged elephants I’ll totally buy it.

  20. I wonder if it will be reported that Lindsay “dropped” the coke straw when she was let go from that label?

    Party on babe!

    :-)

  21. kickservebt

    #11 Flame haired beauty???? ROTFLMAO…

  22. lisad71

    Mama Lohan will blame it on the asthma like she does everything else. I have asthma, I think I will use that as my crutch to get through life from now on. Me to boss, “Go f*ck yourself…oh sorry, that is just the asthma talking.”

  23. EllaKennedy

    I used to want to like Lindsay Lohan. But this is an implosion on the Britney Spears level. She’s rapidly becoming indefensible. Actually, I think she’s already reached that point.

  24. Dena Lohan—- How DARE they do that? I mean she’s only 19, why should she be expected to honor her commitments, she shouldn’t be held up to any expectation of that. She should just be allowed to party and do what she wants…asl long as she makes enough money to support me and takes me with her to the clubs.

  25. bootface

    i bet her music SUCKS SHIT anyway.

    and even though she’s a ginger kid, I’D STILL HIT IT

  26. since when is ginger a singer? have i be under a rock? maybe i should cut back on the sugar tits — they are rotting my brain!

  27. Berrylicious

    Lindsay sucks! Why do you insist in putting her on EVERYDAY! I know she is good for drama and cheap bikins’ but damn enough! Give me more news on Angelina!!!

  28. I think the reason I got fired is because I’ve got no talent. And that I LOVE cock. I mean coke.

  29. Cerebulon

    Just remember… in the UK, “Honey to the B” was a hit. If they dropped Lindsay, how crappy does her stuff have to be?

  30. LilRach

    Fuck i’m getting sick of this bitch. In ONE WEEK she has been on this site EIGHT TIMES!! WTF is up with that?!

  31. RichPort

    All of the A&Rs who signed her and all of the station managers who played her shit are the ones who should be canned.

  32. the wolf

    She’s building quite a career of alcoholism and not showing up for work. I know lots of people like that, and they’re all huge successes. Huge.

  33. Sheva

    Oh that’s so terrible and not hot.

    Signed,
    Paris Hilton – porno star and perfect singing twat for you

  34. ValeWolf

    Who’s falling worse? Lindsay or Britney?

  35. Sheva

    Britney has already fallen, but has tons of cash.
    Lo-whore is in free fall and is not nearly as cash healthy.

    And the Lo-whore fall shows no end in sight. :)

  36. BarbadoSlim

    They did it to poor Yoko Ono, they did it to Pete Doherty, then OJ, aaaand Mel Gibson and now they’re doing it to poor Lohan, fucking jewish media IT’S NOT FAIR!!!

  37. BabyBlue

    Martini anyone? Or 12…

  38. xenobia

    Over here a giant purple and yellow blob (no jokes, his name was Mr. Blobby) got to number one so Lindsay must be bad. Although over here Lindsay is still that chubby ginger chick from mean girls.

  39. twzzlrgirl

    Lindsay is another perfect example of a talentless celebrity who thinks they can stay on top of the game without having to do anything. Shall we have a superfish countdown to see how long it takes mommy dearest to come to the rescue on this one?

    This is SO unfair to do to a young girl!!

  40. ValeWolf

    #37 – Very true. Lindsay’s fall is more embarrassing, though. She doesn’t have the massive fortune like Britney but still believes she’s the diva hollywood was waiting for and for that she’s being put in her place by her bosses.
    At least Britney is falling beause of the love for Cletus. Cletus or not it’s still not the same as cocaine.

  41. LASmogProtection

    Eventually she’s going to get fired from all of her jobs and lose all her money by shopping all day on Rodeo. Then she’ll wonder what she did wrong.

  42. phishgirl646

    Check out giantmag.com for more info on the story and other Lohan disasters…

  43. WAHOOligan

    This betch wants to party like an adult, drink like an adult, and snort like an adult, but can’t get her lame, skin-and-bones ass out of bed to fulfill her obligations and do the work she has signed on to do (like an adult) in order to afford the fame and lifestyle she is so desperate to maintain.

    Sickening, really. And then she goes and has her mommy stick up for her when the suits call her out on it. UGH! So when she’s trying to get into clubs and bars to drink and coke-out the night away, she’s an adult now, and when she needs to get movie studios and record labels off her back to cut her a little slack, she’s just a kid still that needs to be made concessions for.

    I swear, this ho is a walking ball of contradiction that needs to have all attention taken away from her. Can we please let her fade into obscurity until her E! True Hollywood Story comes out in 2017?

    Sorry Ho-Han, really, really loved you in Mean Girls. It’s been crap since then.

  44. HarryNipples

    #29 and #32…

    Good God I agree – I am sick to death of this cum-belching little fuckhead – can’t we find some other screwed up celeb to shit on??
    How about posting a photo of Barbara Streisand taking out the trash without her makeup? I would certainly shit my pants and scream like a prepubescent girl, but I could sure think of some choice shit to say about THAT bitch!!

  45. HarryNipples

    OR….

    Anything about Colin Farrell, as everyone well knows, I would slide naked down a 50-foot razor blade into a vat of iodine just to suck on his rank little unwashed boxer shorts for a few hours!!

  46. FecalPellets

    Speaking of 5-legged elephants….

    http://waveydavey.fotopic.net/p15203126.html

  47. HarryNipples

    #48…

    Holy mother of God…I did not think elephants were that well-equipped! Now all you would have to do is crop that sucker and stick it on a picture of Colin Farrell, and that would just about be right!! (I’ve seen the infamous sex tape…yumma…

  48. HarryNipples

    Now Edna has something new to think about when she masturbates (which is often…)

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