Lindsay Lohan finds Jebus

This makes me sad in the pants.

Superfish took down the Rumer Willis post where she was smoking something naughty.

#41 – laughing so hard that I’m crying. Best post this month!

#52 oh fuck we forget about the transparency agreement

[what]

creepers ? …already ? : )

ok hello babes
now fuck off
and yes…

“This is Jesus. Lindsay Lohan is a very good girl.”

You guys got it all wrong. Lindsay doesn’t even know how to read. The only reason she has the book of bible quotes is because she was being hounded by Tom Cruise during her time of weakness. Since she doesn’t know how to read, she picked up the book of quotes by mistake, yelling, “Begone! Evil henchman of L.Ron Hubbard!” Since Tom Cruise is also illiterate, he thought it was a real bible, and scurried back into the darkness, whelping.

You guys got it all wrong. Lindsay doesn’t even know how to read. The only reason she has the book of bible quotes is because she was being hounded by Tom Cruise during her time of weakness. Since she doesn’t know how to read, she picked up the book of quotes by mistake, yelling, “Begone! Evil henchman of L.Ron Hubbard!” Since Tom Cruise is also illiterate, he thought it was a real bible, and scurried back into the darkness, yelping.

AA encourages this. Just let the girl be happy already. She’s recovering and I hope she doesn’t read this nonsense.

she just wants all the attention..that’s it.

When the AA people mention a higher power,Lindsay thinks they’re refering to a better quality coke.

Jesus should’ve hid better.

it looks like the only picture of the book is the book inside her car, so we can’t actually say that it for sure hers

Actually I saw pics on another site, and she is totally just walking around with the book obviously displayed…I stand corrected

oh Lindsay, you always keep be guessing

Just like Skange…photo-ops with a Jesus book, or an adopted rainbow, do NOT make you classy! Lindsey and Skange would stop, if people weren’t buying it! Wake up, people! Lindsey Lohan is a skank! Skangelina is a skank! (But the biggest employer of nannies in the US). I actually feel sorry for “firecrotch”, has anyone seen her skankX2 mother???

When she finally gets arrested, you’ll notice I said when not if, she should be sentenced to house arrested. All these pathetic celebs should always get sentenced to house arrested. The criminal’s punishment is for the good of society and what we all need and they need is to be shut in, that’s what their inner fatty really wants anyway.
All the idiots like Lohan, Paris, Nicole, Britney, need to be locked up in their houses and taken out of the vicious circle they’re stuck in so that we can have a break and they can stop hiding from themselves. Shut them in and they will have to see what they really are. What these bitches need is a major fucking time out, if I was their Ma I would straighten those whores right the fuck out. There would be none of this shit on my watch. They would be going to rehab LONG TERM and then they would be donating every waking hour to charity until they had a little respect for life and what it’s all about.

thats a hollowed out copy in which she keeps her weed

64–I was gonna say she tears out the pages to roll up and snort coke through.

Whatever. That’s the Anarchist’s Cookbook with a cover stolen from the local Best Western. The Gideons will not be happy.

yeah theres coke in that book.

Frist, explain this whole frist, first thing.

Lohan is clearly a Dupe of the Conspiracy. She a subversive Pinko who plays Golf with the Anti-Dobbs, himself! She is a parasitic Slack thief and I wish I could hold her down and tatoo 13013 across her forehead backwards so she sees it every time she looks in the mirror.

About as credible as her 90 day sober button from AA.

Hey! Maybe now she’ll get baptised so the net will post pictures of her in a dripping wet, transparent, white robe that sticks to her surgical enhancements!

Breaking new ground! Paris, eat your heart out!

Lindsay is featured in Chapter on the Talking CelebFic site:

http://www.puzzlekiller.com

Celebrity Fiction with Britney, Paris, Lindsay and many others. Wild Hollywood Sex.

Does the book contain the part in the Bible where the drunken, adulterous, spoiled bitches get thrown into a lake of fire? Cause if I’m remembering correctly, that was one of God’s Promises, too.

techclerk #71, that’s some funny shiznit.

For LiLo to find meaning in something she reads would mean that she has read anything. The back of a box of Pop-Tarts or a shampoo bottle.

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Oh, now I get it! It’s all so clear now.

If, however, she is embracing a relationship with God through Jesus Christ, I predict that she will make an amazing change for the better. Do I expect it? No. I read some of the article of her mother. The woman should be retroactively arrested for child abuse.

I’ve been to the Ivy. When my wife and I first moved to LA we drove around in our sweaty moving clothes looking for a restaurant to celebrate at and ended there b/c it had a pretty patio, though we had no idea what it was (because we’re stupid). It sucked. Almost $40 for a tiny cut of steak that they refused to cook rare. God-damn I hate restaurants that refuse to cook steak rare. I have since been informed that the Ivy is 0.01% famous people and 99.99% not-famous-people hoping somebody will think they’re famous if they wear big sunglasses and dress like this ho-a-tard.

No surprise she carries a bible. Rehab is a thinnly disguised recruiting outlet for jesus freaks. They practically ram that shit down your throat.

Good, she needs him.

Thank you Mr Boognish for that in-depth report. Exactly how much rehab have you done in the last five years? You can round up or down. Doesn’t matter.

#78
I have never been to rehab, but I know a few people who have and they all complain about being force fed the “higher power” crap.

Oh, and fuck off.

i love jesus

its…
almost
like

you are
the only
one
we can
trut=st

what?
a skank : )
is that what we’rer supposed to say?

frist, i really need to know the history of frist and first.

Fuck ou Lindsay Lohan, FUCK YOU!!!

she really has a great sense of fashion! i loved it. just keep posting her pictures.

I really wish more people could understand what its like to be followed on a daily basis.

Can you imagine if you were being followed all the time?

I would it hate it if someone was always following me around. I would especially hate it if someone was following me around while I was trying to get fucked up.

Wouldnt you?

I feel sick to my stomach over whats happening to all these young women…especially Lindsay.

Everyone is so quick to cross the line with her…how would you like it to be under surveillance 24/7?

I agree that she should find other places to hangout, but guys be reasonable….NOBODY IS PERFECT and she never claimed to be.

Stop scrutinizing every little thing regarding her personal life. Its so ridiculous already.

LINDSAY,

If you read this…email me, I got your back in NYC baby!
(everyone else can go screw!)

what happened to talking about jesus. i liked talking about jesus

Awwww……well let’s talk about Jesus some more…..
Wait, who’s Jesus?

LMAO. Please. We all know Jesus does NOT love Lindsay Lohan. Nor does anyone else.

Lindsay’s committed so many sins that now she’s afraid she won’t get into heaven. She’s to lazy to read a real bible so she’s trying to get into heaven with Cliff Note’s version of the bible.

Dear Boogie,

I am writing this from inside my closet cuz I am so scared from your colossal command of the english language that I am retroactively committing suicide.

Yah.

I am typing this very slow and I wil not use contractions so that I do not confuse you. If you are not part of a solution then you are a really big problem. Really big. Like your ego. I know that is a complicated concept but just think of yourself as a twinkie with twenty pounds of filling. Get it?

Good. Now run along.

PS notice how I did that without resorting to profanity. That’s for simple minds like, well, you know…

OK, why does almost everybody in hollywood have tiny star tattoo *some*where? At one point I wanted to get one on my foot, but now that I’ve seen it popping up everywhere, I’m a tad creeped out. Is this some kind of ‘sign’? are they in league w/ Lucifer…..?? >:D whmmwahahahahahaaaaaa!

Sad…so sad…

#85

She asks to be followed every day. She likes it. She deliberately puts herself in situations where she optimizes her chances of being photographed.

I really wish more people would understand what it is like to CHASE PAPARAZZI every day. If she didn’t want to be photographed, she could hide. No big problem. Really. It’s not too hard.

Soon she will be ignored and run for all she’s worth (Like Britney) and you will see her freak out and melt down in public to get attention.

You are very naive to have sympathy for her.

Seriously, If she truly has Jesus in her life and turns her train wreck career around, I think that would be strongest proof of God that we could witness in our lifetimes.

She must have seen ‘the light’ lately reading books like this.It’s probably the operationlight when she got her appendix removed.