Lindsay Lohan doesn’t have a drinking problem

I think the thing I love most about these pics of a shit-faced Lindsay Lohan falling on her ass is that she still managed to pull it off even with a police escort. No, really, I’m sure these guys were reluctant to show up in the first place, but soon realized they were protecting an entire neighborhood from a fire-breathing blowjob goblin. That’s why they became cops, dammit.

UPDATE: Lindsay claims the paparazzi pushed her into the tree which very well could be the case. Then again, you still have to factor in this occurred at 5:30 a.m. this morning while leaving a house party and gin makes Lindsay forget Michael Lohan’s sperm is part of her DNA. It’s a vicious cycle.