Lindsay Lohan Wore A Fake Engagement Ring For Attention

“Watcha doing, Linds?”
“Invoicing you for the john you’re stealing from me right now. Was about to tell him it’s twenty to jack him off in the coatroom, but you can’t sell the sizzle when he already ate the steak.”

Everyone’s laughing at Lindsay Lohan again, because they think she wore a fake engagement ring to a Halloween party just to get attention, but that’s because they’ve never heard of “the girlfriend experience.” It’s actually a brilliant concept where a high-priced escort, like Lindsay’s proven herself to be over and over again, gets paid to not only provide sexual service, but also a general sense of companionship for lonely, wealthy men who don’t have time for real relationships. They’re like George Clooney only the exact opposite and with the kind of herpes you can’t cure by drowning a prostitute in your Italian lake. “I kill-a fifteen of-a them, but the a-freckles, they no leave-a my cannoli!”

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Vantagenews/Xposure/AKM-GSI