Lindsay Lohan Was Tipped Off

I’m trying to avoid the 800 reports coming out of the Lindsay Lohan stealing a necklace fiasco because it’s dovetailed into the usual avalanche of bullshit. That said, I found this one worth noting because it reinforces just how fucked up law enforcement is in LA and why none of you who live there are safe. TMZ reports:

We’ve learned the warrant was signed by Judge Katherine Mader at 3:45 PM Tuesday. The LAPD was making plans to execute the warrant — which authorized cops to search for the necklace at Lindsay’s home in Venice, CA.
But somehow — before the search was conducted — Lindsay’s stylist showed up at an LAPD substation and returned the $2,500 necklace.
Sources connected with the case tell us … they believe someone told Lindsay the warrant was in play. Otherwise, they say, why would she have her stylist go to the LAPD to return the jewelry rather than the jewelry store?

When Lindsay Lohan – the poorest and least influential celebrity of the moment – somehow manages to have the LAPD on her payroll, you almost have to wonder how the entire city hasn’t devolved into pure chaos. I’m talking post-apocalyptic, Robocop-esque levels of turmoil where celebrities run around kicking babies into the mouths of coyotes for sport, and the police suckle at their freckled teat as if it’s a beautiful day around the Maypole. I have no idea what any of that means, but let’s assume it involves the LAPD being paid with cash Lindsay printed herself. “Thanks again, Ms. Lohan. This stack of.. 30s? should put diapers on my kid. Wanna shoot my gun at pedestrians before I leave? I don’t mind.”

Photos: Pacific Coast News