Lindsay Lohan Injected Herself Into The Tom Cruise Girlfriend Auditions Story

September 7th, 2012 // 76 Comments

For reasons known only to herself and a freckle affectionately named Rumplestealshit, Lindsay Lohan tweeted the following message to Tom Cruise after Vanity Fair promoted their cover story claiming the Church of Scientology “auditioned” girlfriends for him who were punished with hard labor if the relationship went south. Not surprisingly, Us Weekly has read the whole article and says it has absolutely nothing to do with Lindsay. She’s not even mentioned in it:

Keep in mind, these auditions took also place in 2004 when Lindsay Lohan had just turned 18. Don’t get me wrong, the Church of Scientology is fucking crazy, but not crazy enough to make their 42-year-old telekinetic Space Jesus date a barely legal actress. Also, I’m pretty sure they knew the question, “Hey, Tom, want to date a teenager?” would be answered with, “Ooh, like Jonathan Lipnicki?”

Photos: AKM-GSI

superficial

  1. Lindsay Lohan Cleavage Swimsuit Poolside
    Monsignor Nelson
    Commented on this photo:

    Armpit vag.

  2. Lindsay Lohan Cleavage Swimsuit Poolside
    YTBOY
    Commented on this photo:

    WOW, THATS HOT!!!!!!

  3. Lindsay Lohan Cleavage Swimsuit Poolside
    YTBOY
    Commented on this photo:

    FANTASTIC!!!

  4. Lindsay Lohan Cleavage Swimsuit Poolside
    Commented on this photo:

    She actually thinks this looks good. The curves she does manage to have are all in the wrong places.

  5. Lindsay Lohan Cleavage Swimsuit Poolside
    YEs
    Commented on this photo:

    The freckles don’t bother me. Its her legs in general. Out of shape with saddle bags and kinda messed up. She’s under-30 but has the legs of a 40-something scrag that comments on blogs all day.

  6. Lindsay Lohan Cleavage Swimsuit Poolside
    Rob
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn! that’s a lot of freckles!!!!!!

  7. Lindsay Lohan Cleavage Swimsuit Poolside
    DBN
    Commented on this photo:

    She has the tits of 20 year old and the legs of a 50 year old….

    • you need to take another look at her tits. She has the tits of a 50 year old…they match the legs. And if you know what’s good for you, do not seek out photos of her ass in a bikini.

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