Stop Lying About Lindsay, You Guys

Lindsay Lohan is in New York right now because earlier in the week she was questioned by police after attending a house party where a bunch of jewelry wound up stolen. Of course, these are all facts I just made up because I hate comebacks. Sometimes I think about putting them all in concentration camps and then conquering Poland, I hate them so much. Via Twitter:

Damn, she’s onto us. And here I was going to point out she’s leaving The Dream Hotel owned by that rich millionaire guy she bangs to get into parties she’s not invited to, but it looks like the jig is up. This is just a library, folks, she was there teaching poor kids how to read. God, this is embarrassing.

Photo: INFdaily