Lindsay Lohan Claims She Lives in Poverty

Aww, it’s nice that the people who work at the court like this tenderly old bailiff have become like family to her. “Hey, how ya doin’, sweetheart? Always a pleashah.” *smooch*

Roughly every four weeks Lindsay Lohan is hauled into court so she’s made aware of exactly how much shit she can constantly get away with which was, of course, the case this afternoon when it was revealed she’s barely even trying to complete her community service. On top of that, she hasn’t enrolled in counseling and claims she’s too poor to afford it because her SAG insurance ran out. Granted, I believe that last part because that’s what happens to unhireable drug addicts, keep in mind Lindsay lives in Venice Beach and drives luxury vehicles because only an asshole would run over a baby with anything less than a Maserati. RadarOnline reports:

But what Lindsay had not yet started was her psychological counseling which her lawyer Shawn Holley informed the court was because her hard-up client could not afford it.
This despite the 25-year-old actress arriving in court in $1,200 Christian Louboutin heels and renting a multi-million dollar home in Venice.
Holley said that because Lindsay’s SAG insurance had lapsed, she could not afford to pay for one-on-one counseling and that group counseling was out of the question for fear that others would sell her out to the media.

At this point, I shit you not, the judge asked if Lindsay knew of someone with a credit card who could front the cash which I like to believe caused a full hour of laughter after someone suggested she ask her parents for the money. Anyway, Lindsay’s lawyer said they’d find a way to foot the bill, so you can only imagine how that’s gonna happen:

JUDGE: Will your client be able to enroll in counseling by the end of the month or not, Ms. Holley?
SHAWN: Just a moment, your honor. *whispers to Lindsay* You know what you need to do, right?
LINDSAY: *pantomimes giving head*
SHAWN: We’re good, your honor.

Photo: Getty, Splash News