Lindsay Lohan Paid A Porn Star To Have Sex With Her While Michael Lohan Was Sleeping

The Superficial / March 20, 2012

Porn star Alex Torres (a.k.a. “Voodoo”) apparently woke up the other morning and decided he wanted some instant publicity by making up a story that hinges on Lindsay Lohan paying for goods and services while her dad was actually around and doing something that’s not kicking people in the vagina. It’s almost as if Voodoo has absolutely no idea who the characters are in his story which is surprising because I always assumed porn scripts are character-driven pieces. RadarOnline reports:

“Ask him [Michael Lohan] if he knows about that night I had with his daughter while he was sleeping upstairs,” Voodoo says. “I’m not joking!”
Not only does Voodoo claim to have had “relations” with Lindsay, but he makes it sound like she paid him.
“Many of these Hollywood celebrities pay me a high price dollar to come and satisfy them. I’m not joking!” he says.
To clarify, host Jim Richards says, “So you’ve been with Lindsay Lohan?”
“I’m saying that,” Voodoo confirms.

Setting aside all the proof I presented in the opening paragraph that this story is unquestionably bullshit, does this guy honestly expect me to believe Michael Lohan hasn’t trained himself to wake up at the slightest hint of his daughter having sex so he can secretly film it and sell it to TMZ? He’s the goddamn Lex Luthor of shitty fathering. KNOW. YOUR. CHARACTERS.

Photos: Splash News