Lindsay Lohan is Made of Drugs, Says Probation Report

Seen here sending the courtroom more secret messages than the gnomes in my cereal – I will not touch myself in the park! – Lindsay Lohan has apparently been ingesting a cocktail of prescription drugs ranging from amphetamines to the painkiller Dilaudid, according to RadarOnline:

Lindsay Lohan was taking a powerful cocktail of amphetamines and the powerful painkiller Dilaudid during her probation period, has exclusively learned.
The shocking list is contained in the 24-year-old’s probation report, which was given to a Beverly Hills court Tuesday. It is expected to be released publicly Wednesday.
Lohan, 24, who was sentenced to 90 days in jail for violating the terms of her probation, was also taking Adderall – an amphetamine used as part of a treatment program to control symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. The actress was also taking a combination of other drugs, including anti-depressants Zoloft and Trazodone. She also takes Nexium, which is used to treat acid reflux.
They were all legally prescribed to Lohan, has been told. The drugs were detected in the Mean Girls star’s system after she began random drug testing on May 26.
The combination had the potential to “kill her” when mixed with alcohol, said one source.

Damn. Here I thought the judge was making Lindsay keep the SCRAM on until she enters jail just to torture her, but apparently if she takes one sip of alcohol her body turns into an exploding pharmacy. How that wasn’t a convincing argument to let her take the damn thing off makes me question the entire validity of our legal system all over again. This was our chance!

Photos: Getty