Lindsay Lohan is Made of Drugs, Says Probation Report

July 7th, 2010 // 103 Comments

Seen here sending the courtroom more secret messages than the gnomes in my cereal – I will not touch myself in the park! – Lindsay Lohan has apparently been ingesting a cocktail of prescription drugs ranging from amphetamines to the painkiller Dilaudid, according to RadarOnline:

Lindsay Lohan was taking a powerful cocktail of amphetamines and the powerful painkiller Dilaudid during her probation period, has exclusively learned.
The shocking list is contained in the 24-year-old’s probation report, which was given to a Beverly Hills court Tuesday. It is expected to be released publicly Wednesday.
Lohan, 24, who was sentenced to 90 days in jail for violating the terms of her probation, was also taking Adderall – an amphetamine used as part of a treatment program to control symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. The actress was also taking a combination of other drugs, including anti-depressants Zoloft and Trazodone. She also takes Nexium, which is used to treat acid reflux.
They were all legally prescribed to Lohan, has been told. The drugs were detected in the Mean Girls star’s system after she began random drug testing on May 26.
The combination had the potential to “kill her” when mixed with alcohol, said one source.

Damn. Here I thought the judge was making Lindsay keep the SCRAM on until she enters jail just to torture her, but apparently if she takes one sip of alcohol her body turns into an exploding pharmacy. How that wasn’t a convincing argument to let her take the damn thing off makes me question the entire validity of our legal system all over again. This was our chance!

Photos: Getty


  1. Randal's Rectum

    I got nothin’!

    Randal’s Rectum

  2. radio_babylon

    damn, shes some kind of pill pinata or something.

  3. Dorkus
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is she wearing a wedding band?

  4. Dorkus
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone tell me why the wedding band?

  5. Chez
    Commented on this photo:


  6. Rhialto

    F*** U? Damn! Where are her good manners!?

  7. grim reaper

    Who’s gonna pull the guillotine cord?!

  8. bitingontinfoil
    Commented on this photo:

    I believe the writing on the sheet was made by her lawyer. I wouldn’t think Lindsay would write about her in the 3rd person (ie: “LL”). Also, I believe the “fuck you” on her nail was directed to the papz, not the judge. TMZ has quoted LL’s Dad as saying he was “going to call her from a bar and make her jealous”. Christ, is it any wonder this chick is so screwed??

  9. _dmc
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor kid, seriously.

  10. Pantera
    Commented on this photo:

    fucking spoiled brat bitches

  11. Pantera
    Commented on this photo:

    her lips look dried and crusted. too much dick sucking/herpes

  12. Kristine Levine, Pornclerk to the Stars

    Any average, mere mortal, could drink her blood in a highball over ice and die of a drug overdose.

    You realize what this means don’t you? She is the Chosen One.

  13. Stupid
    Commented on this photo:

    In picture # 7 it looks like her lawyer is looking at her Fuck U fingernail. I bet she is disgusted at Lindsay also but hey its a pay cheque.

  14. Roiger

    But… SHE’S A CELEBRITY!! If she goes to jail it will send the message that doing illegal stuff will land you in jail! We wouldn’t want little kids to think that breaking the law would get them in trouble. This could turn people off crime all together.

  15. Kaz

    Go to celebrate in jail

  16. Slig

    Yeah enjoy in jail hahahahaha.i mean she plec in jail just hahahaha .yeah baby .im good person

  17. Frances

    What’s this got to do with anything??

  18. me
    Commented on this photo:

    haha, even her DA looks like she has little sympathy for this spoiled rich b*tch! lindsay deserves all this that she’s getting. just bcuz she’s a “star” doesn’t excuse her from the law. if a simple random person can get arrested for using illegal drugs, then so should she! who does she think she is anyway?

  19. Harmony
    Commented on this photo:

    How heartbreaking! You random nobodys have no idea what celeb A list life is really about. So make random you think you know best responses, trash her down, bc your gods preacher and you know whats right and whats best! When truth is youve fucked up in life at points so who the hell are you to judge! Leave this poor girl in peace and let her recover. Withought negative hate being spwen on her sadly published photos and you people taking the photographs are as much to blame, that was that childs saddest hour, who the hell are you to capture that weak moment. Flip it, would you want photographs taken of your worst hour of life and posted on the internet for ridicule. To unto others as you would yourself, and like your mommas always told you if you aint got anything nice to say keep your mouth shut!

  20. spilshin

    Ahhh….Lindsay, so full of self-loathing and anger, yet apparently extremely generous. Providing the sheeple with something to whiddle away the days which would otherwise be spent on the mundane task of minding their own fucking business.
    Godspeed and thanks.

  21. Kaz


  22. twisted

    she is still a human being…u ppl do fuck all with your life…sad

  23. Joe

    I read in Star Magazine that she was prowling Hollywood Blvd a few months ago at 3am giving out blow jobs for cheeseburgers…

  24. Good Dog/Bad Dog

    This girl has lost touch with reality and just don’t give a fuck anymore. She will one day give the Paps some good print when when she dies alone and miserable. Sad. She was once pretty and young.

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