Lindsay Lohan Doesn’t Look Punched in the Face

Lindsay Lohan tweeted she was randomly punched in the face by a waitress while celebrating her birthday last night at Voyeur. Except here she is leaving the club looking remarkably chipper and non-punched-in-the-facey which makes this Us Magazine source sound a little suspect:

“The waitress has a history with Doug Reinhardt, and Lohan was hanging out with him. She was jealous, and out of nowhere, the waitress punched her in the face!” the insider tells Us. “Doug didn’t want any part of it and went to the other side of the booth. Lohan ran out.
The night didn’t get better from there.
Lohan went to a party at the nearby Rockstar House — and ran into the waitress again!

So basically this “waitress” is like Jaws if Jaws likes to punch freckled cock-monsters in the face. I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume this source had a gravelly voice, not unlike that of a chain-smoker, and paused frequently to yell at her maid for cutting the coke wrong. Call it a hunch.

Photos: Fame, Tonnesson/Pacific Coast News, Splash News