Lindsay™ Hid in The Closet From Her Dad

April 11th, 2011 // 23 Comments

Lindsay Lohan reportedly hid in the closet this weekend while her father Michael Lohan was outside her apartment looking in the windows and “trying to break in,” according to TMZ:

We’re told MiLo was also staring in the back windows of her Venice apartment, trying to spot Lindsay inside, and began banging on the windows.
We’re told Michael has finally left. According to our sources, the cops were not called.

Gee, I wonder why Lindsay Lohan didn’t want the cops involved. I mean, clearly, she’s in the right here: Her father is a trespasser aggressively trying to enter her house without her consent. It’s almost as if she doesn’t want the police there… As if there’s something she doesn’t want them to find… Something like an entire coke sculpture in her likeness. Or maybe just Samantha Ronson‘s severed arm. “Haha! This way we’ll always be together! *pets arm* Always together. *pets pets* Together, together, together…” I bet it’s that.

Photos: Fame, Splash News


  1. Juano

    Idiotic. Why didn’t she call the cops if she was afraid for her life? She obviously could use her phone, as she called TMZ (you know she’s the “source close to LindsayTM”). So, either she or that cretin of a mother of hers is looking for some free PR.

    This is more about attention, just like the fantasies of “going to play Victoria Gotti” or “going to play Lois Lane.”

  2. mensa

    That new bodyguard seems to be working out really well for her.

  3. Bob

    Both her parents are parasites. This is why she has so much trouble. I guess it’s difficult when you’re the breadwinner of the household and your parents are sponging off you, when you career dries up they throw you to the sharks and keep milking it for all it’s worth.

  4. milkcerealbaby

    Maybe her father really wasn’t outside her apt., but she was trippin’ on the psychosis of the Disco Dust. Regardless, her family sucks stale farts from the cushion seats of old MTA busses.

  5. atotalcad

    I’d still fuck the freckles off of her.

  6. jumpin_j

    “Or maybe just Samantha Ronson’s severed arm. “Haha! This way we’ll always be together! *pets arm* Always together. *pets pets* Together, together, together…” I bet it’s that.”

    Preciouuusssss!!! My Prescciouuuusssss!!!!

  7. Didn’t she used to be in the closet anyway?

  8. jojo

    Michael Lohan broke the needle off the creep meter years ago.

  9. Turd Ferguson

    Nice life, Linds.

  10. If there was anyone who was going to put her back in the closet, he father seems like he should be towards the bottom of the list. You know, somewhere after Adam Lambert.

  11. Neen

    Hey, I’ve done this exact thing when my drunk mother in law came for a surprise visit. It worked!

  12. the captain

    ” Truth” will get ya.

  13. Rough's pick

    What an ungrateful bitch. What’s the matter lilo can’t provide free recording to the man that seed ya?

  14. Good shit Fish. The end belongs in a movie.

  15. I wonder what her vag tastes like. Anyone?

  16. I totally believe this story. But then I also forgot that Lindsay moved into the high rise apartment next door to Sam Ronson, and completely believe Michael Lohan scaling the sides like spider man’s less successful older brother who the cops are always messin’ with.

  17. Lindsay Lohan
    Commented on this photo:


  18. cokes a hellava drug

    Her eyes always look so empty.

  19. Lindsay Lohan
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude, I’d share a 12 pack with her and let her know who her daddy really is!

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