Lindsay Lohan Is A Very Busy Movie Star, You Guys

If you think Lindsay Lohan is just going to spend her time before rehab friviously finding new stores to steal from without a bra on, think again. She has a very busy schedule entertaining numerous suitors before filming with a venerable star of stage and screen and fleeing to South America. Wait, what? Page Six reports:

A flabbergasted source close to Lohan told us: “Lindsay’s pre-rehab plan? A week with Charlie Sheen in LA, then she wants to go to Brazil. I kid you not.” Her plans with Sheen include a guest appearance on his FX series, “Anger Management.” The job next week will take two days to shoot, though we hear Lohan will stay in LA for at least an additonal week after copping a plea Monday to spend 90 days in a rehab to avoid jail. In the “Anger” episode with Sheen, “He’s a therapist, and she’ll play a patient who falls in love with him,” Lohan’s lawyer Mark Heller told Page Six. Heller didn’t get back to us about her Brazil plans. And as for reports that the “Liz & Dick” star went to 41 Ocean in Santa Monica on Wednesday night to see her new boyfriend, Avi Snow, perform, Heller said, “Lindsay is a beautiful young woman who has many pursuers and many boyfriends.”

Jesus Christ, this guy needs to stop talking.

“So what are Lindsay’s plans, and will she stay out of trouble?”
“Of course, she will. She’s a beautiful young actress who’ll be too busy having casual intercourse with hundreds of men. She won’t be around anyone using drugs and alcohol, especially cocaine.”
“So who will she be spending time with?”
“Charlie Sheen and some guy named Snow.”

Photos: Malibu Joe/AKM-GSI