Lindsay Lohan’s In A Bikini, Too

August 13th, 2012 // 87 Comments
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Lindsay Lohan has been doing a respectable job of showing up in swimwear whenever somebody more famous than her does, so here she is in Malibu yesterday in case you’re really in the mood for freckles. Which is literally the only thing I could think of to say that wasn’t, “BOOBIES ARE BIG!” even though that’s why we’re here. Although, if there is someone going, “My, look at the legs on Lindsay Lohan. And those jowls, ooh, mama,” listen to the words I’m about to say very carefully: Shooting those people won’t make the voices stop.



  1. Jack Ketch

    Who the fuck wears false eyelashes to the beach ? Ugh. She has the knees of a 60 year-old

  2. LegMan

    I don’t care. Neither should you.

  3. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Lindsay’s looking pretty good for a middle aged divorcee.

  4. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Matt Lauer
    Commented on this photo:

    Goddamn, I can’t recall ever having seen her simulate exercise. Somebody off-camera offering her a line is my guess.

  5. Well done, Lindsay. Flabby, saggy and fried

  6. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she really just 26? She looks 46.

  7. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Never thought I’d see the day tits. freckles, and red hair did absolutely nothing for me.

  8. ace11

    She is awesome

    Don’t care what anybody thinks

  9. Mondo

    She looks SOOOO relaxed peeing her pants on the sand

  10. JC

    I want to nuzzle them, but I want them to be attached to someone else and not reeking of cigarettes and meth.

  11. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Eustace Haney
    Commented on this photo:

    Go Lindsay , Go! There’s someone on the beach with blow and maybe some H ! Find them , and tell them that you’re a star !

  12. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Eustace Haney
    Commented on this photo:

    Not aging well. She’ll be in the park drinking furniture polish in no time

    • Jack Ketch

      Shit, there goes Dina’s gravy train :( Ali’s “modeling career” will end up in the turlet as well, lol.

  13. Clarence Beeks

    she has such a sad ass………..

  14. tlmck

    “I’ve got jugs that jingle jangle jingle…”

  15. Dlisted has an awesome shot of Angelyne holding up traffic, and her body is way better than Lindsay’s. Considering she’s 97 years old, I find that sad.

  16. I’m heading back to Katy’s ass. Nothing to see here.

  17. Ralph Wiggins

    She looks rode hard and put away wet , or maybe just rode hard and stinking of cigarettes and cheap vodka

  18. USDA Prime McBeef

    even if i imagine each freckle as a tiny nipple, i still can’t masturbate to completion using today’s pictorial offerings.

    • Chug half a bottle of vodka first. Since it’s a prelude to everything she does and she’s still not dead or in jail I’m thinking there may be an hidden upside we’ve all overlooked.

  19. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    actually that’s one of the better shots I have seen of her.

    • What, exactly, are you looking at that makes you say that? Unless you mean this is less horrible than most of her horrible shots. Which, it isn’t really (extensions implantations injections belly pouf), so … what *do* you mean?

  20. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s so cute! My grandma tucks her belly into her swimsuit, too, you tricky little trickster.

  21. I’m crazy but I think I would still bang her if I could…maybe I just like fucked up chicks

  22. Please do not call her a sea cow as it really offends us!

  23. EricLr

    I want to lick her track marks.

    Oh shit, did I say that out loud?

  24. McClownerton

    meth! does a body good!

  25. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    She runs in slow motion, like the Bionic Woman. Except in her case it really is in slow motion and her internal organs haven’t been replaced by bionic implants so much as black tar and hemorrhages.

  26. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    what the huh?
    Commented on this photo:

    is she thinking about the train wreck that is/was her career? that face makes me think so.

  27. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    ahh if one there was a way to wash the C-word out of her

  28. Tad Bit Tipsy

    Not pictured, Hazmat team standing by to clean up beach afterwards.

  29. anonym

    oh boy. so plasticized, and looking 10 years older than her actual age.

    she will not age well.

  30. tom

    Sagging boobs make my penis sag. Or sad, if you prefer.

  31. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:


  32. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    I love vodka. Vodky, vod, vod. Here it goes down, down into my fire below . . . .

  33. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Squeezing out a fart at the beach is advantageous. The smell of the ocean can cancel out all but the most rancid of poofs.

  34. El Jefe

    Holy shit, did she just age 10 years in the last 6 months?
    She looks like total shit lately.

  35. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    She doesn’t seem to be in bad shape. She just has no muscle tone.

  36. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “My farts don’t smell. I’ll prove it.” (Beach clears.)

  37. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Duck lips at the beach are called Gull lips.

  38. Who's your mama

    Lindsay is really good at making every woman in the world feel better about herself. At least she has a purpose.

  39. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    After watching all of these pics, I gotta say. She doesn’t look like the mess we think she is. She’s still pretty hot. She just needs to get back into shape and stay away from the drugs.

    • I wouldn’t thumbs you down, Don, but I do gotta disagree. Her hair is nothing but wisps and cheap extensions, her cheeks I can’t even, her teeth oh God her teeth, her lips — well, she must be due for a Restylane appointment because her lips actually look normalish — she is not just out of tone, she is gaining weight (chin, belly, and there is one picture of her legs where even her thighs and knee looks fat). On top of which, every one of these pictures scream “PAY ATTENTION TO ME I AM STILL HOT SHIT” when she clearly is not. She *is* hot — for someone who works at a Dairy Queen in Alabama. For a “movie star”, as she considers herself to be, she’s really just kind of gross and sad.

  40. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “People still steal car radios, you know. How do you think I got this suit?” (Dances.)

  41. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    For a young woman who is so incredibly fucked up, she’s got a great pair of hooters. Too bad they come in the same package as the rest of her.

  42. Emma Watson's Vagina

    . I got a Incredible hulk modeling kit where you need duco cement to place it together. smelled a lot of it. I feel dizzy. I’m seeing colored circles now. WOW who is that hot red head on the beach?

  43. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugh, she’s so gross.

  44. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Not pictured : the Black Power Ranger wondering where his Black Power Briefs went

  45. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s too bad sit ups aren’t crack.

  46. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Rockin’ the Grannie bikini.Linds is trying to cover up the paunch. Fail. I see porn in her future, A la Octomom.

  47. Lohan's shorts

    What U THINK of her (Lohan) haveing her shorts open/unbuttoned / unbuttoned/open w/ bikini bottoms showing ???

  48. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Bubble burster
    Commented on this photo:

    Fat, flabby. Fake tits.

  49. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    somebody tell me when one falls out.

  50. Lindsay Lohan Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    hey, I got a muffin top too!

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