Lily Allen is topless again. What are the odds?

September 11th, 2009 // 163 Comments

Lily Allen poses topless for the October issue of GQ UK, and based on her inability to wear a bra, I can only assume Lily was molested by a Victoria’s Secret mannequin as a small child. That her or her stepmother was a cardigan with a penchant for cruelty. Could go either way.

NOTE: Pic links to NSFW version of British charm.

Photos: GQ UK
superficial

  1. Sexy

    Those are pecks.

  2. Gina

    They are very nice, classy pictures. Who cares if she’s topless? Everyone is naked underneath their clothes. Nudity is a natural part of life.

  3. TheStoic

    No ass. No tits. This chic is figuratively broke.

  4. Wow!

    Thank God you said she was topless cause I would never have noticed those tits!!! I thought he ginnypig had pooped on her chest!

  5. Semi Wood

    Where are the sophie monk bikini pics. I need to get my jerk on.

  6. martygras9

    well put, Gina.

  7. Sam

    Whats the big deal about breasts? Their made for feeding babies, nothing else. I don’t know why america has turned them so sexual.

  8. martygras9

    Well put, Gina.

  9. NEVER BACK DOWN MAN

    Flat chested skank. Booooo. BORING SMALL TITS ARE BORING

  10. TheStoic

    Right, #5 is one of those women who has no sensitivity in her breasts.

    Or is a gay man.

    Flip a coin.

  11. @7

    @7

    Well.. that’s the non fun way to look at it. I like to think, as American’s we are so attuned to finding pleasure that we know the more hide them, the more we can enjoy them when we see them. I mean is it a bad thing that we’ve made them so sexual?

    Hide them from everyone publicly enjoy them extra privately.

    But she’s no my girlfriend, so she should totally keep bringing them out. Every time i see a lily allen post on this site i smile, and 75 percent of the time she is topless, so of course that’s better.

  12. Spam

    I’m pretty sure that half of you who are complaining about her breasts have never seen any in person, and are trying to make up for it with such childish remarks…

  13. Hank Arron Allen

    If I wanted to see a smoking topless nine year old boy I’d visit Father Donovans Choir practice, thanks for ruining my lunch.

  14. Sam

    Breasts are mostly just blubbers of fat, most women don’t really get off them being touched or whatever.

    99% of women would prefer a back massage or a foot massage

  15. alex

    pepperoni guy tits

  16. jay

    this is the reason for plastic surgery
    what an amazing candidate for boob implants

  17. lol its true I would rather have a back massage!! when my boyfriend massage them, i don’t feel much but i could sure go for a back massage right nwo

  18. Ellie

    I think her small boobs are really beautiful…. at least they aren’t gonna sag when shes older, shes gonna have that amazing petite looking body forever… I always wished I could have small cute boobs

  19. sista

    she is soooooooo pretty.
    and real.

  20. sista

    she is soooooooo pretty.
    and real.

  21. Becky of Londinium

    Sam – actually breasts have pretty much been sexual objects since human beings began. The only reason we have large breasts is for the satisfaction of men, when we stopped doing it doggy style the men needed something to mimic the roundness of breasts so women with larger breasts were more desired. The internal and external mechanism is for feeding babies – the reason people gain fat there during puberty is to attract men.
    Oh and I am British, we have naked breasts on the 3rd page of our most popular newspaper in the whole country every day. They are sexual as hell everywhere. Why we are embarrassed/shocked by them is a different matter.

  22. Beau Tocks

    Where’s the third nip?

  23. Colin

    NEVERBACKDOWN MAN, seriously dude? Boring? You’ve been laid few (if any) times I’m guessing. Sorry about that.

  24. Fegirst

    They airbrushed out her third nipple.

  25. @21

    Actually #21 your breasts are large cause you’re storing fat there as well as other places. Just cause you store fat in your thighs doesn’t mean we want fat thighs. Look at the more undeveloped parts of Africa, they don’t see sexuality in breasts at all, the women walk around freely breast feeding their babies and it doesn’t phase anyone and the women don’t have to worry about men gawking at them and thinking sexual. That’s how it should be.

  26. M

    Sam- shut the fuck up you don’t speak for everyone here. You sound like a 14 year old who is off school today. Now go do your homework and let the adults enjoy the boobies.

    And for the record I would much rather have my tits massaged than my back or feet. Ladies…?

  27. @21

    Actually #21 your breasts are large cause you’re storing fat there as well as other places. Just cause you store fat in your thighs doesn’t mean we want fat thighs. Look at the more undeveloped parts of Africa, they don’t see sexuality in breasts at all, the women walk around freely breast feeding their babies and it doesn’t phase anyone and the women don’t have to worry about men gawking at them and thinking sexual. That’s how it should be.

  28. Anon

    What a hypocrite she is.
    She was interviewed by Jayne Middlemiss and asked about her saying she was a feminist and what that meant to her.
    She seemed stumped and said that being a feminist meant she had to be a role model for young girls and that meant not taking her clothes off.

    I only wish she was as good as her word.

  29. Sarah

    Personally I would rather have my back/feet massaged too!!!!! It may just be me but I don’t feel much when my man massages my boobies!

    I think I feel a lot more with feet and back its cause you’re massaging all the tendons and ligaments in your back from the work during the day, while boobs you’re not really massaging anything but my fat and boob goo or w/e

  30. play with them please!

    #26
    I vote for a titi massage any time!!!

  31. Spud McKenzie

    shes hot! big boobs are not always attractive. her figure is beautiful

  32. Something about her makes me horny. She’s such a trainwreck that you know she’d be a dynamite fuck. She’s a ‘swallow girl’.

  33. Dr. Fil

    She’s no Kathy Griffin, but she’ll do…

  34. Richport's Ghost

    This mutt looks like a cross-breed between Joan Jett and Pink.

    Bow wow.

  35. negative creep

    so if most of you would reject girls whose tits aren’t big enough for you, i suppose its ok if they reject you ’cause your dick isn’t big enough?

  36. I admire her lack of inhibitions. :)

    -meream

  37. DonkeyPunch

    Keogan has bigger boobies than this chick

  38. Dave ain't here, man

    @26 and 30:
    How are YOU doin’?

  39. LOL

    I see where they removed her third nipple using a graphics program. LOL!! It’s right over the word, “W O M A N”

  40. TempInsanity

    She needs more cowbell!

    BTW, for the record, statistically speaking, >80% of women enjoy/prefer their breasts to either be touched, massaged, kissed, licked, and/or sucked on.

    The other 20% are either from underdeveloped countries whose women are nasty or are prudes who don’t want to be touched anywhere, anytime.

  41. chupa

    simple unattractive in any way.

  42. Sam

    She’s flatchested and has thick thighs and a round butt. Which means I’m attracted to her. It’s just how I am, and you can’t change me.

  43. lulu

    who cares if she’s topless.

    why isn’t anybody mentioning how ugly this girl is? o yeah, i forgot about that geekologie post about men not even paying attention to a woman’s face.

  44. agree

    #40
    HAHA!!

  45. m

    there’s really nothing sexy or womanly about a non-existent chest. she doesn’t even have a LITTLE bit, jeeze.

  46. @45

    And her butt blends right in with her back. You’re right. nothing here but a 12 year old boy trying to be a sexy lady.

  47. Tards

    I wonder how many people here even know how much boobs flatten out when someone lays down or stretches upwards. Learn the human figure dipshits.

  48. ROUGH daddy

    Go start your rumors by the water cooler you fools, this broad doesnt have a 3rd nipple. I know her chest like the back of my hands :-) ( and theyre small and super sweet) I think Kate Moss got some weird thing by her boobs….

  49. Erica

    #47 is right. These are all really weird, stretchy poses. If she’d lean her chest forward a little nobody would think flatchested, merely small-breasted. But she’s sexy any way.

  50. JJ

    isnt lily allen the one with the third nipple?

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