Lili Simmons Is Your New Naked Chick From ‘True Detective’

February 25th, 2014 // 26 Comments

True Detective is the goddamn highlight of my week, and probably the greatest written, acted, and directed season of television that any of us will ever see. Which is why I hate to reduce it to just another show where hot chicks get naked, but I’d also hate to not have clicks on my titty site that lets me afford HBO and sit around in my pajama pants reading theories for hours on end. A man’s game charges a man’s price, and yes, I just came using that line. Anyway, here’s Lili Simmons the latest – SPOILER ALERT – actress to bang Woody Harrelson‘s Marty Hart, who you can also see in Maxim, and more importantly, this clip of her butt. A butt which if you want to know my True Detective theory, is probably Cthulu. It has to be.

Photos: Getty, Splash News


  1. Many a woman has said that to me in my dreams, none in reality. FML.

  2. Lili Simmons True Detective
    Commented on this photo:

    check out the ’1 literary reference you must know’ on i09. tried to paste the link here but couldn’t. you probably already have seen it, but, jic. :)

  3. M-theory

    At no point in that clip was she naked… false advertising. still hot though.

  4. Banshee

    She has been getting naked in Banshee on Cinimax for 2 years. A little late to the party guys.

    • ‘Was just about to say the same thing.

      ‘Member that episode, 3 weeks ago, when she was masturbating, and showing her fine ass trembling?

      Seriously… can’t believe Fish ain’t watching “Banshee”.

      • cc

        ‘‘Member that episode, 3 weeks ago, when she was masturbating, and showing her fine ass trembling?’

        Holy shit!

        *runs to TV

  5. Guest

    Go check out any of her clips from Banshee, the Cinemax series. She is naked in alot of the episodes.

  6. Hey Fish, Jesus was more than just the Messiah, he was also a champion beard grower. Like Jesus, True Detective is more than just a kick ass acting/writing/drama show, it also provides timeouts for looking at smokin’ hot chicks.

    Just sayin’

  7. Slash

    The Wire?

    How soon we forget.

    • Single season, bro. True Detective stacks up with any single season of The Wire. I’m a HUGE The Wire fan (white people love The Wire) and it sustained excellence far longer than True Detective will have to, but TD stacks up against any single season of The Wire.

  8. Slash

    True Detective is a good show, though.

    Just sayin’. Gotta recognize those who came before.

  9. Lili Simmons True Detective
    Cow GTI
    Commented on this photo:

    Not everyday a woman already rejects me by looking at her picture. But she managed. I’m impressed. Maybe even a little bit in love.

  10. anonymous

    I guess I need to start watching True Detective. Sounds like it’s the new Californication.

  11. Brian

    On the downside, I thought her whole hook up with Hart seemed forced, unlikely, and unnatural.

    On the upside, she has probably the nicest butt you can find on a skinny white woman.

    • I felt the same way, but with this show you have to take the abstract implication into account with the characters actions. It wasn’t just about Marty banging a hot younger girl (though, high five!) but about Hart’s hypocrisy and lack of morality. The same girl he gave money to and dressed down her madam about exploiting he sport fucks and commits adultery with just a few years later.

      People hate and suspect Cohle because he is anti-social, argumentative and peculiar. But he’s far moe moral and self-aware than Marty could ever be.

      Not that anyone needs me to explain this to them. I just like talking about it and my wife is only interested the dumbest fucking television she can find.

  12. Lili Simmons True Detective
    Commented on this photo:

    She also gets her gear off regularly in Banshee

  13. I think the scene of Marty Hart barfing after he rubber gloved the two dickweeds that finger-cuffed his daughter can officially end the speculation that Marty is the killer. Which was pretty stupid to begin with.

    Spoiler alert.

  14. Lili Simmons True Detective
    Commented on this photo:

    She also plays Rebecca Bowman on Banshee, a Cinemax show and seems to undress a lot in that show too.

  15. Lili Simmons True Detective
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she’s so hot One reason to watch both shows.

  16. I fell in love with her on Banshee, she is awesome and gorgeous.

  17. Not only she appears naked but she says the words that any men in the planet want to hear at least once in his lifetime “I want you to fc*k me in the ass” :)

  18. Can’t wait till they talk over that beer, that apparently Martys’ buying.

  19. hottest babe on tele

  20. Banshee…….best series on TV right now …

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