Lil’ Kim’s boobs are exploding

March 2nd, 2006 // 31 Comments

*lil_kim_thumb1.jpgJailed rapper Lil’ Kim and her breasts are fighting a battle to the death, and it appears the breasts are losing. “Apparently, she’s worried her boobs are leaking,” a source says. “She needs to have them serviced.”
Kim is serving a year-long sentence at the Federal Detention Center in Philadelphia on perjury and conspiracy charges. Her rep swears she is “perfectly healthy,” but sources say that she’s confided to family members about a festering problem with her knockers.

I’ve always been perfectly willing to service her boobs. Although that might not be so great if they start shooting stuff at me like the Death Blossom in The Last Starfighter. I’m all for being healthy, but without gigantic boobs, Lil’ Kim serves as much purpose as Magic Eye books for the blind.



  1. SuperSpence

    She should use those things to effect her escape from prison. All she has to do is walk around with her top off, which is pretty much what she was doing when she wasn’t incarcerated. She drops the shirt and then scrambles over the wall while the guards are all too busy vomiting at the sight of viscous goo drippng out of her tommyknockers.

  2. Binky

    Nothing worse than a leaking boob. Errr…,wait a sec, maybe this was my Jenny McCarthy story comment

  3. Quiggie

    When does miss missy get out of jail?

  4. TaiTai

    She needs to have her boobs “serviced”? And I guess they don’t allow that in prison. She will have to go through the drive-thru at Jiffy Boob.

  5. Yikes the health hazards of fake boobs…are they really that attractive to you guys???

  6. Kim’s look kinda freaky because the girl is like 4 ft 11in. with HUGE d-cups, it looks sort of like an 8 year old girl with two basketballs shoved down her shirt.

  7. PostAcidYouth

    you’re not telling me that these don’t scare the bejesus out of you. Because they do scare me. They look like alien incubation pods. You get too close and something will burst out and choke you to death. In fact, that must be the source of the leakage

  8. ESQ

    Ahhh,what probably happened was that “Queen Bee” lost her title to “Big Bertha” and her knockers got the saline/silicone punched out of them. Note to Lil’ Kim while in jail you better check yourself before you wreck yourself. Your 4 foot nuthin’ status becomes diminished real quite in prison.

  9. ESQ

    I meant to say “quick” not quite.

  10. male_nurse


    I never thought I would ever see Lil’ Kim’s Boobs and The Last Starfighter appear in the same article.

  11. miadm2002

    Sorry to hear about the bad boobage, but what do you expect when you put something man-made in you?! Kim looks like a whore in wonderland.

  12. And the winner of the geek of the week award goes to…..

    I mean, really, the only thing you could think to compare boobs to is from the Last Starfighter? That would be obscure even for Comic Book Guy.

  13. gogoboots

    Her boobs are leaking! OMG! That must be a horrible experience. It’s also funny, she has one of the worst boob jobs I have ever seen. She’s tiny and yes, it does look like she’s an 8 year old girl who’s shoved basketballs down her shirt. I think they’re so big that she has to be naked for her to be comfortable, shirts are probably too constricting…(or so she claims).

  14. gilmore_gargoyles

    Apparently “ice” melts in prison.

  15. Miss Skyline

    Not exactly the most pleasant way to go to prison. I hope she has the problem tended to soon.

  16. TheLusciousDeluxe


  17. gogoboots

    her nipples are scary and huge #17, another case of potentially exploding boobs is about to take place, hence the leaking i daresay!

  18. LivingDeadGirl

    That would actually be funny if they did explode or get damaged and she had to remove them. Then when she came out of jail she woud be unrecognizable and would claim to have lost them in a big prison riot or something like that. She could say they protected her from being stabbed by a fellow inmate with their large size and strength. Seriously those things could protect anyone from being harmed if someone came at you with a sharp object.

  19. BoardBetty

    I can assure you that Lil Kim is having her tits serviced while she in in prison. She’s making one big bull dyke VERY happy right now!

  20. LB

    God, warn us more next time.

    I remember seeing a kinda scary picture on the net describing in quite calm, medical terms what happens to women with breast implants. The pictures they showed of deflated boobs (on girls who were 20-30ish)… well, suffice it to say that part of me deflated along with them.

  21. ButtSnack

    I hope I’m reincarnated as her baby so I can have the chance to suckle on said leaking boobies.

  22. LaydeeBug

    She has been, is and always will be a pig. She may flow well, but that’s where her talent ends. She’s a cochin!!!

  23. HughJorganthethird

    call FEMA

  24. Otto

    This is so racist. If a white girl slept her way to the top of the rap world and then got too big for her britches and lied about a shooting and then went to prison and then had her boobs start leaking No one would say shit. This country is sooooo racist. I’ll bet Christina Alguera doesn’t have to put up with this shit.

  25. HollyJ

    Christina Aguilera isn’t black???

  26. Mr. Fritz

    Lil Kim is nasty and it doesn’t matter what race she is. I love women of all colors. She is so fake and tries to look like a black version of Pamela Anderson. She likes to wear fake blue contacts and blonde hair. She looks better when she looks natural.

  27. TheLusciousDeluxe

    17 – LOL, cruel, but I couldn’t help laughing when I saw that.

    26 – LOL.

  28. sarakai

    I guess it could go to her advantage- all she has to do is stand near the wall of her cell and BOOM, get outta jail free card!
    Of course, having your chest blown apart could be a health hazard…

  29. Lil’ Kim is anything but little.

    Here boobs are rocking. Huge gallery here:

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