Leonard DiCaprio is obviously unfamiliar with the term succubus, because he and Kirsten Dunst have sparked romance rumors after they were spotted canoodling in public at the Los Angeles nightspot Privilege earlier this week. A witness is quoted by Britain’s Daily Star magazine as saying: “You could feel the chemistry between the two. It looked hard for them to take their eyes off one another.”
Leonardo DiCaprio has dated a lot of jaw-droppingly beautiful girls. He has a good eye for the ladies. Therefore I can only assume that one of the following has occured. Either 1) these stories are lies, 2) Leo’s high as a kite, 3) Leo’s gone gay and naturally thinks Kirsten is hiding something in her pants. Maybe there are other explanations, involving black magic and testicles kept in jars of ether, but I just don’t want to know.
JakeLover0410 | November 18, 2005 at 12:06 pm
I hope it IS true. Then Jake Gyllenhaal will be FREEEEEEEEE! hehe.
Love your site…keep up the great entertainment!!!
Jenn
Scott | November 18, 2005 at 12:25 pm
Not to anger the Superficial gods or anything, but what’s so wrong with Kirsten Dunst? I think she’s hot…not as hot as Gisele, but hot nevertheless
ElFurbe | November 18, 2005 at 1:25 pm
There’s just something about her face that doesn’t work for me. Some people might call that thing “the ugly”. I leave it to you, good reader.
mrsloquacious | November 18, 2005 at 1:33 pm
I agree. Her face is “off” somehow. Maybe it’s because it reminds me of putty…too malleable and squishy, and without tone and definition.
If Leo gets ripped up more, he could do better. However, the Leo of right now is a bit *wide* for my tastes, so they almost deserve each other. At least, he doesn’t deserve Gisele.
Zanathon | November 18, 2005 at 2:27 pm
I think Leonardo DiCaprio is dating Dunst to research a role that involves loving overrated women.
His next test subjects are going to be Scarlett Johanssen and Jessica Alba.
Leo will do Paris Hilton last, so as to give him time enough to recover from the various venerial diseases he’ll have contracted from her.
elle | November 18, 2005 at 2:41 pm
i used to have the biggest crush on leonardo dicaprio, until i realized titanic sucked..but back to the real issue, regardless of my taste towards his movies, leo is gorgeous and i’d do him in a second. he should be with a beautiful equal not troll face.
elle | November 18, 2005 at 2:44 pm
by the way, that pic above of dunst is a way better photo than how she usually looks. and it’s still not the greatest.
an44 | November 18, 2005 at 3:39 pm
she looks EXACTLY like a smarmy, puckered sphinxter. sorry, graphic, but true.
cat_taylor | November 18, 2005 at 4:08 pm
Sorry, but I can’t picture Leo any other way than that character he played in What’s Eating Gilbert Grape. I think he is a gross, underdeveloped, slimy skeez who never quite went through puberty.
Audrey H. | November 18, 2005 at 4:13 pm
She looks like a pig. Like those German girls who look like pink pigs and have dirty sex on a pile of hay.
Her smile is bizarre, her nose is ugly and her face is way too round. Beautiful eyes, but that’s it.
Oh, and let’s not forget the saggy 70-year-old granny boobs.
Jivenut | November 18, 2005 at 6:50 pm
2 overrated and recently ignored celebrities getting together and then all of a sudden they are in the news again? Hmmm…Does Hollywood have a fucking rule book to follow when you’re slipping from the “A” list or something?
kiki | November 18, 2005 at 7:15 pm
It’s because she looks like a vampire.
I think she may be one. Well, she is, obviously.
The Scarlet Bitch | November 18, 2005 at 9:30 pm
Looks like lestat just found a new victim.
FLaViTa | November 19, 2005 at 10:30 am
I really don’t get why everyone hates her, I thinks she’s beautiful and a great artist. For Leonardo di caprio, how could he dump that brazilian girl????
ebayfan414 | November 20, 2005 at 4:30 am
Well, Kirsten Dunst is not that ugly, actually. The problem lies within. Within her head, that is. Within her empty head, I should say. I heard that she was born with a penis in her head instead of a brain. Hence, she is attracted to gay males, such as Leonardo Diffaggio.
Leonardo, as someone correctly mentioned in a comment, has never quite finished going through puberty. He has a condition commonly known as “An Actor Who’s Acting Skills Suck More Than Kirsty Ally Sucks Food Down In A Minute.” It’s quite a sad condition, really. His voice began to change when he was about 10 years old, but that was the end of his puberty, as his acting skills were so bad his body refused to grow.
Nowadays, he is resigned to using a dildo when he is having sex with penis-brained girls, such as Kirsten Dunst.
1776er | November 20, 2005 at 2:25 pm
DiCaprio’s a Pruis-driving fagg. See Giselle Bundchen didn’t mind dating him since she’s a dirt poor foreigner and any car is like a mystical object.
But apparently most girls in LA aren’t going to lay a guy who drives a golf cart.
Oila! He’s humping a troll.
In case anyone’s wondering, David Hasselhof drives a Lamborghini and his dick is constantly raw from screwing hot chicks.
HollyJ | November 21, 2005 at 12:49 am
There are a few slight things wrong with the physical appearance of Kirsten Dunst. (The brain thing is obvious.) First of all, she has a big round pumpkinhead. It may as well be used for an NBA basketball. A big pumpkinhead procludes you from being attractive–period. No one wants to give birth to a pumpkinhead baby. It’s a dirtied gene pool. Small ferrel eyes, while bad enough, are made worse by the pumpkinhead. Where ARE her eyeballs? …Don’t get me started on her urine-yellow teeth that are bent inward on a curve and overlapping each other at every possible angle. She looks like her mom had some exposure to radiation while Kirsten’s fetal teeth were forming in the womb. And whoever claims to be her ‘stylist’ should go kill his or her self immediately. NOW! And..um..ok…I was just wondering.. What does Hasselhoff have to do with Kirsten Dunst? That was a hilarious random side note! …Still…I have to say…if David’s getting laid, the Apocolypse is just around the corner. Glad the Germans like him. His penis, in Germany, just MIGHT be far enough away from me, since I’m in WA State. MIGHT. I have to Google the distance from here to Germany. If it’s not far enough–like at least 15,000 miles–I might have to relocate to Hawaii or Japan. I don’t know if I can EVER be far enough away from his privates to be comfortable. ::shiver of revulsion::: EW. That image is worse than Kirsten’s pumpkinhead. Maybe David’s little German schvonschtucker should hook up with Kirsten’s big pumpkinhead? A new children’s tale..”The Pumpkin and the P” ..You guys are so funny.. This site ROCKS!
plastic peeps | November 21, 2005 at 2:29 pm
You’re crazy if you think Kirsten Dunst isn’t hot! Have you never seen “Bring It On”? The movie sucked, but watching her legs and ass under that cheerleading uniform kept me glued to the TV.
HOMELESS(TM) | November 22, 2005 at 8:49 am
he told me she gives good head.
but they are not together.
you people should get out and give out some head.
then our troops can come back home.
I put the G in G_UINT cuz BABY I GOT GAME! | November 30, 2005 at 7:50 pm
yeo. umm well first off, id honestly like to know where you people are getting your info. like seriously ? its ridiclious. have you ever heard the word RUMOR? it means its an unvertified “idea” believed by some people, but cant be proved true. just cause they maybe hang out togeather dosnt mean he likes her in that kinda way, like honestly he cant even chill with some of his friends of both sexes with out some messed up loser who has nothing better to do then make stupid shit up about his PRIVATE LIFE! and have it circulated its crazy like seroiusly, just cuz he goes somehwere with one of his friends thats a girl DOSNENT MEAN hes ” dating her ” . psssht people these days. who actually believes this crap? hahaa its kinda funny though how everyone believes these rumors. actually half of what u read about Leo, is bull shit .. actually most of it is like him being gay. which i can ASSURE YOU HE ISNT. common sence..guys, USE IT! its just publicity they make money by that which is pathetic, i know. they have nothing better to write about then pitty fraudulence. so when PEOPLE read about it or hear about it they assume its true. which really makes u look like an ass toward him if you believe everything you hear about him. i mean there are some pretty twisted up bizarre, preposterous roumers about him which arnt true that PEOPLE these days actually believe them…would you honestly, believe if someone told you that MIKE JONES was quitting rapping forever and became gay.. i HIGHLY doubt you’d believe it. and no there NOT togeather. eekkk hes too good for her, by FAR! kthanxbye!