LeAnn Rimes Has ‘Curves,’ You Guys

July 5th, 2011 // 92 Comments

While we may suck as a nation at convicting female child murderers, it’s important to remember we’re still really awesome at telling LeAnn Rimes she’s a fucking lunatic every single time she tweets a bikini photo (above) with some retarded caption like this one from yesterday, “CURVES….They are there LOL.” Yes, our legal system is flawed, but at the end of the day we don’t let the black and white filter on Photoshop trick us into thinking a Y-list singer doesn’t have the body of a goddamn praying mantis. THESE COLORS DON’T RUN.

Adding… And, of course, she copied Brandi Glanville. Again.

Photo: Flynet


  1. Jack Ketch

    And aside from the fake “tits,” where the hell are they ??

  2. Dude of Dudes

    That butterface of hers wont allow me to enjoy “the curves”.

  3. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    finally my pretend girlfriend is hot again.

  4. Chris

    Even if she had curves, that wouldn’t help her busted-ass face.

  5. Richard McBeef

    She needs to have the polarity reversed on those tits so they aren’t repelling each other.

  6. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    She *doesn’t* have the body of a praying mantis. She has the face of one. Actually, her face looks like a raptor, especially in the black & white rear view bikini shot.

  7. vitobonespur

    Even if this pic were on the up-and-up (dubious at best), that still leaves her with a Seabiscuit face…

  8. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does it have Michael Jackson’s face?

  9. poodie

    Obviously photoshopped.

  10. Cardinal Fang

    I think she owns slaves.

  11. she should have got bigger tits. 800cc would have helped her out a lot.

  12. Anon

    She looks like a fucking lemur in the face.

  13. Cock Dr

    She’s a fucking lunatic.

    • Dan

      Concur – why is she still defending her body on Twitter.

      She also did copy her husband’s ex – said almost the exact same thing… in about the same pose.

      Wow. She is pretty nuts. Or her husband is really good at mind fucking.

  14. conspiracy

    It’s a fake. You can tell by the shadows.

  15. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s actually trying to copy Helena Christensen in that Chris Isaak video, except he’s going to put a saddle on her and ride her to do battle with the Planet of the Apes.

  16. LeAnn Rimes Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like an arrow pointing to a box of infidelity and lies.

  17. MisterSuccint

    … but her face has only straight lines.

  18. I don’t think “curves” that you paid a doctor to implant under your skin counts in this context.

  19. rican

    Hey she’s invited to sleep in my bed anytime she wants.

  20. LeAnn Rimes Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    I think it’s worth noting that some of her most noticeable curves are synthetic.

  21. This looks like either the beginning or the end of an Aphex Twin video.

  22. LeAnn Rimes Bikini
    Satan's bitch
    Commented on this photo:

    I can see that she’s thoroughly enjoying the “ocean” in her “swim suit” while wearing her “swimmin’ jewelry” and texting on her “water phone”…

  23. boing

    even my ass looks like that when you blow out the brightness / contrast of a photo.

  24. wb

    I’d hit it.

  25. Venom

    It looks like she has a University of Michigan M tramp stamp tattoo, so as alumnus I am obligated to blast all over that.
    It is like an open invitation really.

  26. i bet she fucks good, she’s got nothing else going for her…

  27. Reece

    Black & White, HIGH contrast, softly focused and grainy makes me look like I have less curves.
    In other words, Mrs. Cibrian, those tricks make everybody look better.

  28. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Good Gravy
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks pretty good to me. Too bad you dick lickers like dudes.

    • viasacra

      Of course you like anorexic chicks, it’s the only way to make your small dick look big in their hands.

  29. Proud atheist

    I’d fuck her. And you would too.

  30. Horse faced cum dumpster.

  31. btreese

    I’d certainly do her…over and over…for a weekend. But that’s it. She’s sick in the head.

  32. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    It is all Bad Angles and Lighting

  33. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    I have more curve in my big toe.

  34. LeAnn Rimes Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “I look extra skinny next to her.”

  35. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    then I want to lick your big toe……she’s fuckin hot and always has been!

  36. Frank Burns

    Hey fatty, lose some weight before you put on bikini! Its back to a one-piece with the built-in spanx for you!

  37. I keep forgetting, did she win a Grammy or the Kentucky Derby?

  38. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s Falcor the luck dragon. Minus the luck.

  39. Gucci

    “Psycho Hosebeast suffering from AIDS and Bulimia….They are there LOL.”

  40. anonym

    ……….but still has severe horseface

  41. McPedro Gonzales

    She has curves, and a Butterface.

  42. LeAnn Rimes Bikini
    Commented on this photo:


  43. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    she is one homely girl. beautiful voice, homely girl. crystal harris is a prettier version of leann rimes. do you suppose eddie has met her yet?? i hear she’s single again.

  44. LeAnn Rimes Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    There are WAY too many fat broads in the world for us to be making a fuss about someone being too thin. So stop that. Now. Or I’ll hold her butt till she screams!

  45. LeAnn Rimes Bikini Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    If by “curves” she means blatantly fake breast implants, then yeah…she has curves.

  46. LeAnn Rimes Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Thats one big noggin

  47. the captain

    why is her BELLY not visible?

  48. So much easier to Photoshop your head onto another body, when you don’t have to adjust for skin tones. I also like the turned head/over-the-shoulder pose, so that there’s an easy seam to use for pasting. I will say this, though, well done on avoiding the rookie error of making the head too big for the body.

  49. Big Mike

    The problem is your ugly LeAnn. If you weren’t a star.. you wouldn’t get a second look at Waffle House on a Friday night at 3 a.m.

  50. LeAnn Rimes Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Do you guys hear something?

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