So apparently Larry King’s divorce was triggered by him sleeping with his sister-in-law and something about his wife banging their kid’s baseball coach. I don’t really know because old people sex should be illegal, but what I find hilarious is reports that the couple were physically abusive towards each other, according to TMZ:
So began 5 years of never-ending drama. Friends tell TMZ there were numerous instances where the couple was fighting, sometimes physically. One friend recalls an incident outside of Nate ‘n Al in Beverly Hills a year and a half ago where the couple was “punching each other.”
1. How does someone even know they got punched by Larry King? You’d just assume a faint breeze softly caressed your face with maybe a twig in the mix.
2. Who the fuck punches Larry King back? The man’s 800 years old! The fact he didn’t explode into a cloud of dust proves we still understand very little about the human body. Or that Jews really do know magic and we should start hiding our money in lead boxes so they can’t see it. I go back and forth.