Lamar Odom Just Quit The Dallas Mavericks

April 9th, 2012 // 33 Comments
'It's God's Plan'
Khloe Lamar
Lamar Odom Traded To Dallas Read More »

Back in December, Lamar Odom was unceremoniously traded to the Dallas Mavericks by the Lakers and somehow talked Khloe Kardashian into moving with him despite her family’s track record of never leaving LA because it’s rich in whore-ranium. At the time, Khloe called it “God’s plan” for them, so of course only four months later, they basically just said “Eh, fuck that guy” because Lamar just quit the team. ESPN reports:

“The Mavericks and I have mutually agreed that it’s in the best interest of both parties for me to step away from the team,” Odom said in a statement to
“I’m sorry that things didn’t work out better for both of us, but I wish the Mavs’ organization, my teammates and Dallas fans nothing but continued success in the defense of their championship.”

I honestly don’t follow basketball at all, so I don’t have any legitimate theories of my own for Lamar’s lackluster performance this season which I realize everyone will blame Khloe for, but let’s be realistic: If the man was going to show fatigue from hours of marathon Wookiee sex, it would’ve manifested itself by now. No, what people should be looking for are two bite marks on his neck that clearly suggest Lamar’s lifeforce is slowly being drained by an undead, plastic vampire woman with a dry vagina. Again, I don’t have a degree in sports medicine, but I’m pretty sure someone who does will wish they thought of this first. (FACE.)

Photos: Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Splash News, WENN


  1. WhiteChick

    We like whores in Texas, but she wasn’t blonde enough..

  2. Clarence Beeks

    Now he kan koncentrate on his Reality TV kareer.

  3. Cob Bostas

    He quit the moment he put on a Mavs uniform.

  4. Dick Hell

    Kris Jenner’s F5 vaginal dust devils will eventually destroy us all.

  5. it had to be said

    Never bring a non-K into the Family. Without the NBA, this is just the Wookie and Bald Giant Show. Not one “K” in that title.

  6. Khlodom want quit Texas! Khlodom want move back near water! Khlodom want more ball time! KHLODOM SMASH!

  7. Bonky

    He went from the Lakers to the Mavs and now to nothing. This will not sit well with Momma Kris and I sense that right now she is going through her filing cabinet looking for a copy of divorce papers to fill out for Khloe.

  8. o0

    Simple as this. Being a trashy Karsashian pays more than being an NBA player these days. Sad but true.

  9. Lamar Odom Fired Cut Mavericks Khloe Kardashian
    suck it
    Commented on this photo:

    You know this nigga must be a GIANT if he is making Khloe (in heels mind you) look petite standing next to him… Dam!

  10. El Jefe

    Divorce in 3…2…1..

  11. Lamar Odom Fired Cut Mavericks Khloe Kardashian
    Commented on this photo:

    He just does not look very bright.

  12. Anonymous

    Doubt they’ll get divorced. He’s still worth over $50 million which is probably more than all 3 sisters combined and was due to be an UFA at the end of the seaon. All he did was free himself from a team he hated and freed the Mavs from having to pay him $9 million this season.

    • it had to be said

      Except, of course, he proved that he is a head case, and a quitter. He went from being a cornerstone to being a “piece.” Probably cost himself a lot of dough.

      • Anon

        Cost him $9 million probably more like $4.5 million since he did play over half the season. Someone will pick him up. He just won’t be making $9 million a year ever again.

        However I would not be surprised if he never plays in the NBA again with such a huge fall from grace.

    • Bonky

      But he doesn’t help “sell” the kardashian image any longer. He might have money, but right now he looks like a loser and the Kardashians are very shallow people who won’t allow that.

  13. Wasn’t aware “quitting” was an option in pro sports. Seems like it would be a contractual nightmare for whoever is interested in the dumb SOB.

    • it had to be said

      Yeah. If you’re lucky you can try to not pay him. But if the $$$ is guaranteed, and the decision was mutual, they might pay him not to play.

    • Anon

      It’s not the Army–quitting is an option. A NBA contract probably has some sort of non-compete clause though so if you do quit–you can’t just go and play for the competion. The player probably has to sit out for a period of time, not get paid and possibly give back some of the money the team paid out.

      • Pretty much what I meant, yeah. As well as the idea that, “Well, in Dallas it didn’t work because he is the one interested party in a sham TV marriage to part of an entire family defining the modern definition of ‘whore’ — plus he’s only happy in LA” might be a hard thing to push past even a desperate NBA GM.

        But after Vick, it’s clear anything goes in sports as long as the ball goes where it is supposed to go.

  14. Alex

    Between him and Delonte West, they put more hours in strip clubs than practice anyway. Mavs don’t have time for that shit. West will be next to “leave”.

  15. misterfister

    He is a useless milk dud that sucks and his wife has beef curtains.

  16. Pop

    E channel is the murder channel. Karma for at least one of those scomsuckers.

  17. jim

    She is the hottest woman on earth and was amazing!

  18. KK-Hater

    Who quit what? Who the fuck is this useless dick “Lamar Odom”? What the fuck are the Dallas Mavericks, a Lacrosse team? Either way who gives a shit if he’s attached to a cunt named Kardashian then he deserves all the shit he gets. HA! HA!

    Fuck all you Kardashian Twats!!

  19. Colostomy Bag

    Epic failure of a trade. LA got worse, Dallas got worse.

  20. Jessic

    I LOVE THE KARDashians. They are the first Family of America and BillionaireDatingSite was Fabulous!

  21. Lamar Odom Fired Cut Mavericks Khloe Kardashian
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