Lady GaGa solved the AIDS crisis, everybody

By: The Superficial / April 13, 2010

Lady GaGa has declared herself celibate in an attempt to solve the AIDS epidemic, according to People:

“I can’t believe I’m saying this – don’t have sex,” Gaga said in England, where she is promoting MAC’s Viva Glam Campaign to fight AIDS. “It’s okay not to have sex, it’s okay to get to know people,” she says. “I’m celibate, celibacy’s fine.”
Gaga says she is advocating a ban on sex for herself in part because the HIV cases among women around the world have steadily risen, while cases among men have dropped.

Wait a minute. How many people is Lady GaGa banging that personally abstaining from sex will stop the spread of HIV? Hasn’t she ever heard of wiping her genitals afterwards with a Clorox® Disinfecting Wipe? That’s why I carry at least ten in my wallet and have the world’s palest penis. Translucent, you might even say.

Photos: Splash News